Criminal Minds One Shots

He's From Vegas (TeamxReader)

"I got squat," Morgan admitted deflatedly. "I'm out."

"Same here. What about you, JJ?" Prentiss asked.

"No, no, I'm staying in. I wanna see Spence in a collarless shirt," JJ said with a flick of her eyebrows.

"Really??" Spencer nearly begged.

"How you doin' Mama?"

"Mmm, you tell me my Chocolate man." Garcia called Morgan over to show him her hand.

"Mmm, no bad sugar."

"Hey, Peanut gallery, you done comparing notes?" Rossi asked.

Everyone laughed.

"Yeah, I think so. How bout you, y/n? Fold?" Spencer asked.

"Not a chance," you replied, a devious smile on your face. "Flush."

The rest of the table revealed their cards. Prentiss had the lowest hand and was eliminated, leaving you, Rossi, JJ, Garcia, and Spencer. Three rounds later and it was just you and Spencer.

"Fold and you'll get a lighter punishment," you offered.

"Not a chance, y/l/n."

"Fine. What's your hand?" Before he could answer, you lay your cards flat and smirk. "Four of a kind. Kings and an ace."

The previously eliminated players 'ooed'.

"Damn, Pretty Boy. I think y/n's got you!"

"It does appear that way, doesn't it?"

"Reid, what are you hiding?" Prentiss asked.

"Oh nothing," Spencer replied innocently. "I'm just pointing out that looks," Spencer laid his cards flat, "can be deceiving."

"Crap," you said to yourself. "Straight flush."

"Yep," Spencer beamed.

"He beat me. How did he beat me??"

"He's from Vegas," Rossi reminded.

"I am banned from several casinos," Spencer admitted. "Now, your punishment."

"Oh please go easy on me," you winced.

"Okay. Eat (least favorite common food)."

Your eyes widened as your mouth fell open. "You- you can't be serious??"

"Indeed I am, y/n. Indeed I am. Actually, I think we have some in the fridge over there." Spencer got up and returned with a container of (least favorite common food). "Go on now. Eat some."

Hotch stepped out of the elevator right as you vomited into the nearest trash can.

"Hey, Hotch," you eeked out.

"What's going on here?"

"Y/n lost Texas Hold'em," Spencer informed with a bit too much glee.

"Right. Well, Casino Royale, make sure you clean this all up before you leave." With that Hotch walked up to his office. "Oh and y/n? Never play a strategy game against Reid. It's never gonna end in your favor."

"You sound like you speak from experience," JJ prompted.

"He does," Rossi replied.

"David," Hotch warned, struggling to keep a straight face.

"Let's just say that Garcia might be able to dig up some photos of Hotch wearing an 'I Wuv Hugz' shirt."

The whole team began laughing hysterically as Hotch locked himself in his office, chuckling lightly at the memory.