A Soft Devil (COMPLETED)

Chapter 53

The next few days I revisited Lily's words, and overlapped it with Alex's words. It all made sense, but I wanted Grayson to break it down for me. I wanted him to explain everything. We were driving up to Otisville to visit Matt. I would ask him then.

During the first few minutes of the car ride, we were in a comfortable silence, but I was nervous. I was nervous to hear what he would say.

"Grayson," I started.

"What's up?"

"Have you ever," I paused to gulp down my nervousness. "Have you ever killed somebody doing this gang shit?"

He was silent for a minute, but I heard him exhale a sight breath.

"I'm not going to lie to you. I've killed somebody before."

I felt my breath come short, and my mouth went dry. My whole world stopped.

"W-Why?" I asked before he could see my expression.

"Because if I didn't do it then he was gonna kill Ethan."

"Was it just him?"

"Just him."
We were silent after that, but I had so many more questions to ask him.
"Why did you ask?"

"I needed to know."

"You need to know every fuckin thing about me huh?"

"What's that suppose to mean?"

"It means you always have to be up my ass about everything."

"Because Grayson Lily and I were talking last night, and it made me realize you're keeping me out of loop of your gang business that could cost you your life! Ten years from now when we're still together, living life I don't want your past to come up and haunt the both of us. I don't want to wake up one day, and not know why someone would kill you! I can't lose you Grayson. I've already lost my brothers, parents, and best friends. I can't lose another person I love Grayson! I can't!"

"You love me?"

I had realized what I said the second to last sentence. Fuck I didn't mean for that to slip out, but I wasn't going to lie to him. I answered yes.

Grayson got off the interstate to pull the car over. When we came to a stop, he took my face in his hands, and kissed me. It was a hard and passionate kiss. I kissed him with the same amount of emotion. It was a kiss I'll always remember because it was an I'm-staying-forever kiss.

We finally pulled away to get a breather, but he still held my face and looked me deep in my eyes. He placed his forehead on mine.

"I'm not leaving you Cindy. That I promise. I'm sorry for not telling you everything, but I'm not used to opening up to people. I never knew you cared so much."

"I'll always care about you Grayson."

He looked in my eyes before pressing his lips back on mine. He parted from me to place a kiss on my forehead before pulling me to his chest. He held me there for a minute, but I didn't mind.

"I'll tell you everything."

I nodded my head against his chest. We stayed like that for another minute before we parted, so he could continue our drive.

"It won't be long before GFA comes to an end. The trips Alex and Chris are taking are our last drug missions then we're done, but if everything goes by smoothly we'll never hear a word from the cops."

"But how?"

"If you don't want people to talk, you don't start shit, you pay them their money, and you remain unidentified. How you remain unidentified is through different personals. That's why all our jobs are so tricky because you have to remain hidden, but install trust."