Forbidden Secrets (Completed ✅)

Thirty Seven

Jordan said nothing. The lump in his throat seemed to be preventing him from breathing good much less talking. They walked silently in to the suite of rooms. Every step that Jordan took seemed to feel like his feet were made of lead weights. Bubba said nothing as he went straight into his room. Jordan paused by the sofa to watch him. He had never seen Bubba that dejected before. Walking into his own room he felt the lump get bigger as he saw the empty hangers in the closet. Some were crooked because of her hastiness to leave. He threw himself face down on to the bed and screamed into it. The muffled sound filled his ears with a roar.
There was a small knock at the door and he sat up quickly almost hoping that she would be standing there. Chad looked back at him in concern.
"What the hell happened to you tonight" he demanded frowning
"Go away I am not in the fucking mood" Jordan snapped with his face down in the bed.
"Come on man, I have some people you need to meet" Chad said with a gesture to the door.
"You have got to be fucking kidding me" Jordan hissed  jerking his head up
Chad laughed "No I'm not, come on this will cheer you up"
"Chad nothing could cheer me up at the moment so fuck off" Jordan barked  laying  his face back onto the bed
Chad walked over and pulled at Jordan's leg "come on man, this is important" Chad almost whined
Jordan gave a noisy frustrated sigh into the bed. He slapped his hands down in anger as he pushed himself up glaring at Chad.
"This better be good" he hissed at Chad has he dragged himself to the door.
Jordan stopped dead in his tracks. He couldn't believe what he saw. He slowly turned to look at Chad who was grinning, overly  please with himself.
"This is what was so fucking important" Jordan said through clenched teeth, "You have got to be out of your fucking mind" Jordan snapped as heat radiated off him in violent waves.
"What's wrong with it?" Chad asked  grinning sheepishly as he walked over to the sofa.
Jordan watched in fury as Chad picked up a beer from the six pack on the table and sat down in between two random women. Jordan stood in utter disbelief. What the fuck did Chad think he was playing at? Did Chad  actually think that alcohol and random women he couldn't give a shit about were the solution to his problem?
"Hey Jordan come over here" the lanky blonde said with a seductive smile and a gesture.
Disgust waved through him as he saw her apparent easiness. His mind flashed back to the night he met Steph ,how he  needed to actually walk over and introduce himself. She'd ignored him. Ice filled his heart with shocking speed.
"Jordan?" the blonde said again.
"Sorry guys I am  beat, so I'm tappin out  have fun" he said with a slight wave in their direction.
"Come on man" Chad said
"This is more up your alley" Jordan snorted  as he went back in to his room ,slamming  the door with a resounding thud. He kicked at the bed.

Where did that fucker get off thinking that was what he needed? A fucking divorce is what he needed.

Jordan fell back on the bed , staring blankly at the ceiling.

What in the fuck  was he going to do now?

Jordan  pulled out his cell. He wanted so desperately to call her, needed to hear the sound of her voice for comfort. He settled for a message.

Please remember that i love you no matter what.

He sighed as he got up to empty his pockets. The silver S seemed to scream at him from the dresser. He pulled off his sweaty clothes and left them where they lay as he fell back into bed. He reached out his arm to turn off the light and the last thing he remembered before he fell into an unconscious sleep was hearing giggles from the living room.

The cab ride to the airport was pure agony. Steph felt like all of her emotions had been split in two. Part of her wanted to just run back into Jordan's comforting arms , accepting everything that came with loving him and the other part of her just wanted to run and disappear from all of it. She guessed that's what she was doing running away to her only source of support. She wasn't quite sure how they would react to the news but she was sure they would support her. She felt a since of comfort as she stepped into the sea of anonymous people going about their daily lives. She absently drug herself through the normal routine of check in almost with a numb sense of herself. Standing in line for security she felt her cell phone buzz, an alert that she had a text message. She gasped and slapped a hand to it as she began to shake. That could only be one person at this hour and she was so afraid to see what it said. She gripped the phone tightly in her hand as if it were her only life line. She felt the tears that were burning in the back of her throat flood into her eyes and she wiped them away quickly. The lady in line behind her gave her a concerned look and Stephi gave her a halfhearted smile. She knew she couldn't read the message here, she would lose it completely. When she regathered her things after their complete search she found the nearest airport bar and sat down. Taking out her cigarettes she lit one to steady herself and opened her phone. When she read what the short message said she couldn't control the shaking. The tears spilled over from her tired eyes and she hid her face as she finally gave into flood of emotions that had been threatening for so long. The bartender gave her an odd look as the tears subsided into silent racking sobs. Steph didn't know what she was going to do now. She had just given up everything that mattered to her in a blink of an eye. Her job and the man that she loved.

What was she thinking, how could she just do that over something as stupid as a comment that he had made to his wife?

The thought sent daggers of fire down her spine.

His wife.

In the back of her mind she knew it was about his life and career, but why hadn't he ever told her. Did he not think he could trust her? She shook her head to clear it. This was about Jordan and no one else. He had to get his shit together she thought angrily. She was tired, so tired of the excuses and the denials to everyone. Every time a comment was made he went ballistic, who were they talking about, how did they know? She was mentally exhausted from trying to put out all the fires that had been rumors about them. Of course she had help. Her girls were great at stomping out any rumors that were floating around. That made her laugh. The stories they had come up with to cover up the sightings and pictures that had surfaced of her and Jordan. She winced again as the burning in her throat rose. What were they going to say? She knew that they would support her without a doubt but would they hate her for breaking Jordan's heart? Her rambling thoughts were easing her mind and she ordered a straight shot of vodka to steady her nerves. She composed herself and made her way down to the terminals. She thought she would at least let Brian know what was going on, like he really cared but he was attempting to play the part so she figured she could too. The phone rang in a far off place that she once upon a time called home. The machine picked up and she wondered absently where he could be at 1:15 in the morning. She left a brief message giving him the change of plans and where he could reach her if need be. The thought of him cheating on her at that very moment seemed to flash in the back of her mind and the fact that it didn't really bother her spoke volumes about their crumbling relationship. It had long been over and she knew that. Jordan had always feared that he was the cause but she knew that it was over even before she had met Jordan or they would have never happened. The burning in her throat rose again as she thought of what she had reassured him of. She had told him that when your heart was consumed by true love there was no room for anyone else to slip in and that love just didn't fade.

Steph  knew that she had been in love with Brian at one time but that had long passed and it took her meeting Jordan for her to finally see it. She pulled her knees against her chest up into the seat with her as she rested her burning head on them.

Why did life have to be so fucking  complicated?

Steph  really just wanted to scream, wanted to run out onto the runway and scream until she just passed out from the exhaustion. Her mind wouldn't be quiet, wouldn't stop from all of the memories and the ramblings. She reached in her purse and pulled out her wallet. She opened it and found her pictures that she was never without. She pulled out the one of her and Jordan that was taken on the beach in Florida not even a month ago. She ran her hands over the image as the tears splashed down in her lap. Jordan was spinning her around in his sunburned arms as she laughed historically. Bubba had taken that picture when they were getting ready to leave. Jordan was chasing her up the beach and had threatened to toss her in the water. She laughed as the tears continued to fall. He was such a baby, he wouldn't even go into the water far enough to throw her in so he just spun her around until she thought they both would throw up. The old woman beside her leaned over and looked at the picture.