Muscled Mafia Love {manxman}

Chapitre Seize.

Orlando Bloom as Colonel David McKenna.

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Muscled Mafia Love: Chapitre Seize

~John Cavanaugh~

I fucked up.

I fucked up badly and I knew it.

Just one look at his face and as those pretty blue eyes started filling with tears, I knew I had broke his heart and I hadn't mean to. 

I didn't mean to push him away like I did. But when he asked about my father, the man I hated more than anything in this world, it felt like I was 8 years old all over again and my father was raping me once again. I felt disgusted, not at Demetrios, but at myself because I couldn't do anything about it. It was because of my father that I was still afraid of the monsters under my bed.

But I forgot all about that evil man when I was with Demetrios, having the best time of my life. Watching him throw his head back and laugh, giving me the pleasure of seeing the most beautiful smile ever, I knew I was a goner. The first time I had ever met him, I took one look into those blue of his, I knew I blew it. I knew I had to have him, one way or another. My heart began to beat erratically every time he was near me. 

He spoke to me in that smooth voice of his, igniting every flame inside my body and all I could think was, 'Oh shit, he's beautiful in every way possible.' Demetrios Kanzaki was nothing compared to the guys I had ever liked in the past. He made me feel things I had never felt before and I didn't know how to describe them or what they were. I could never get bored with him, just sitting there, talking with him. 

I could never get enough of looking at him and that scared me because I had only met him a few weeks ago. Ever since then, I could never stop smiling. I could never not be around him. It physically pained me to not be near him. What was this called and how could I stop it? It made me afraid because for once, I could not see the outcome or the end of it.

I wanted to reach out to him and pull him into my arms and tell him that everything was okay and that I wouldn't let a thing happen to him. I wanted to trace each and every one of his scars and tell him how perfect they were. He made scars look sexy. That night when he asked me to stay with him, his shirt had ridden up his chest and I saw all of the many scars that plagued his stomach but instead of feeling disgusted, I found it so fucking hot.

His hand was intertwined with mine. His hand fitted in mine like it was made just for me. "Demetrios, what have you done to me?" I shook my head, a smile on my lips and it never left. I hated that look in his eyes when he talked about his family, how nervous and frightened his body aura was. I didn't know what do but I wanted to protect him. To hold him and let him know that I would always be there if he needed me, forever and always.

Damn, I had to fix this. Demetrios Lukas Kanzaki was someone that I couldn't go a day without seeing. He affected me and I didn't know why. He had the power to make me bare all of my soul and all of my secrets to him without any problems and I knew I would do it, given the chance. I honestly did not want him to be mad at me. The looks of anger he gave shook me to my very core. 

"It makes me so mad..." I leaned against the wall, sighing. I didn't like how he looked so fearful of me when I saw all of the scars that aligned his wrists. Like he was waiting for me to walk out and never come back. That was something that I couldn't ever do because the thought of ever leaving him gave me pain. I always wanted to be by his side and nowhere else.

I wanted him, that was for sure, in every single way possible. It was probably why I went out my way to make sure he was okay on every mission he went. If a single pore or a single, solitary piece of hair was as so much touched, I was livid. "Just thinking about it pisses me off so much." I sighed. I wanted to tell him everything about me, about my father at the table but I couldn't. It took me back to when I was younger and it made me feel as if I was still stuck there.