When love is near

Chapter 3

Pet peeve, to be placed by circumstances in a crowded place. Why did I said yes again to singing in front of these busy drinking people. 

Eyes roam around.

Ah! Yeah, the bar owner is my friend. Great! Jamie, you said yes taposrereklamo ka. Aba, magaling.

Peek at the crowd. Hopeless face.

"Let us all welcome my very good friend to serenade us for tonight, Jamie!"

Crowd clapping.

Did I hear my name called? Shucks! Jamie ikaw na nga kakanta!

Nervously walks up the stage. Carefully sat down the stool.

Ahem. Ahem

Clears throat. Tapped the microphone.

Hello everyone! Good evening to the beautiful ladies and handsome gents in front of me tonight.

Crowd warmly applauded.

Pasensya na kung medyo kabado ako, nahila lang talaga ako ni Yoj dito sa stage.

Crowd laughing.

Anyway, here's a song that has touched my heart for quite some time now. Hugot song kumabaga.

Crowd cheered. The music played. She started singing.

Thoughts running.

Why am I having a cold feet? I used to sing a lot and being nervous is not foreign to me pero, why this intense? Gosh, even my hands are shaking! What is going on? Oops, my voice starts to sound shaky, I need to calm down before I fall apart.

On the way to the chorus. Eyes pan in every corner of the bar.

Good thing the lights are facing me. It had made performing much easier, making the audience look vague. Wait, I am running out of breath. Bakit ganito nararamdaman ko? Kinakabahan ako ng walang matinding dahilan? At bakit parang masakit?

"Cause every time your love is near, every time I'm filled with fear. Cause every time I see your..."

Shit! 

Catching her breath.

"face"

Is that him? It is him!

"My heart begins to race every time"

Why is he here? Universe! nananadya ka ba? Gusto mong pumalyaako sapagkanta? You really have your amazing timing to annoy me noh?"

Looked back at the guy.

 Shit! siyanga talaga.

Looked away.

Calm yourself Jamie or you'll blow up your performance. Sing from your heart, but he is bugging my heart!

"one half wants me to go, other half wants me to stay"

I can't take my eyes off of him now. It's like in this crowded room, he is all I am seeing. Even if it's vague, foggy he is everything that is clearer. My chest is hurting, bakit?

Taps her chest.

"could this be the to last?"

Snapped. Eyes looked for him. Breathing in and out.

Where is he? Bakit siya umalis bigla almost at the end of my song? Is it too much to ask? I was singing for everybody, but I longed for him only to hear my heart out through my voice.

Crowd applauding, shouting for more.

Nahalataniyakaya? Nai was staring at him intently during those choruses? I've never hated you self.

Hiding backstage. Peeking outside.

What were you thinking Jamie? He is with his wife! Why are you so damn affected! You don't even know the guy! The last time you talked was when he asked for your freaking order. Anongarte yan?!

Peek again.

He hasn't come back huh? 

Inhale. Exhale.

Jamie, please stop acting like a high school kid stalking and hiding from her crush! You are twenty-seven years old! You are a professional Marketing consultant, not a professional stalker!

Hands cold. Walking restlessly.

Get these truth bombs in your pretty little head. The man is married, he is with his wife and friends. He doesn't know your existence nor want to discover you, you do not exist in his realm! You do not matter! Okay? So forget about that strange feeling you are feeling, that invisible connection? That's rubbish! Wala yan, isang malaking guni-guni mo lang ang lahat. So stop assuming and stop imagining or even stare at... oh gosh! He became more handsome and hotter and.... Ugh Jamie!!! You are hopeless. I should've just drowned myself in the sea!