evanescent

eighteen

The pounding wasn't just one or two knocks here and there. It was a constant pounding, it never let up either. If anything it got more and more loud the more we let it go. I had a feeling in my gut that I knew who it was but I didn't want to believe that feeling. Harry got up and put his eye against the peep hole before looking back at me.

"Fuck our lives", he whispered and I tiptoed over to the peephole so that I could see whoever it was too. There Niall was, just as I had expected but I hadn't expected him to come with bags and suitcases, which I assumed were full of my things. 

"Fuck", I whispered back at Harry all while Niall was still pounding insistently at the door, " I am just going to go back to eating and act natural while you open the door."

I scurried back to my seat at the table and began to cut my pancakes, minding my own business. This wasn't my house so it wasn't my responsibility to answer the door. I was just going to use that as my excuse. I was actually more nervous as to what Niall's reaction would be if I were to be the one who opened the door instead of Harry. It was Harry's home after all. 

Harry slowly started to open the door and the second it was open just a little, Niall pushed it open. He carried the bags in setting them down as soon as he was fully in and just stared at me eating my breakfast.

 "You have got to be kidding me", Niall said walking over to where I was at the table and sat down. His voice made it seem like he was really angry but his actions as he sat down and just sat down said otherwise. Niall was a guy that you thought could get angry and be angry but never really could in the way that you anticipated. Harry just sat down and ate his breakfast too, ready for whatever show Niall and I were about to put on for him.

"So you come here? I should have known? I should have known that you would come here of all fucking places".

"Yeah, you should have", I retorted back, " because I was trying to make you trust me and worry less about my whereabouts. You constantly worry about Harry and I together, so why wouldn't I come here. You are just shocked because someone finally exposed your secret and I don't have to look stupid in our relationship anymore."

"Let me explain myself", he said and he opened his mouth to say more but I stopped him.

"What the fuck is there to explain, Niall? Seriously, tell me! Because I can tell exactly what is going on just by looking at these pictures. You played me the whole time we were together. You liked to have no comitment when it came to your family and you wanted to live the single life whenever there was a holiday. You wanted to fuck other girls while still getting all the benefits of being in a stable relationship."

"It was never like that", he started to raise his voice but it was also weak. It was like he knew that everything I was saying in this conversation was right.

"Then tell me what it was like. Every Halloween when I wanted to dress up in matching costumes, every new years kiss I never got, every birthday of yours that I never got to spend with you, It was all so that you could pretend you were single. I thought this secret about you two being brothers was bad but I never knew what you were hiding from me."

" I was thinking about you the whole entire time, Daisy", he tried to explain, " I thought about you the whole time and every single girl I was with I was thinking about you. I hope you know that and I am sorry. I am so fucking sorry I fucked up everything we had."

"Don't."

"Please just let me", he tried, he was practically begging now and I just couldn't do it. I could no longer feel sorry or weak for him.

"No. We never had anything. You were with other girls from the beginning of our relationship and never took us seriously. You liked how I genuinely loved you and you liked to think you were a good boyfriend with me when you never were, Niall. I can't entertain the idea that you are a good boyfriend anymore because you never were."

"That isn't true", he seemed truly upset now but I had no remorse for any ounce of sadness he had. I wanted to be as ruthless as possible at this point. He had played me for so long with no intention of telling me what he was doing. So many people could have known what he was doing with these other girls and the fact that I was just now finding out made me look so stupid. I didn't want to be with someone, or even associated with someone, who had no problem making me look stupid.

"Daisy I-"

"You constantly wanted to argue with me about trust because you knew I shouldn't have been trusting you so much and I'm over it, Niall. I can't do this", I stopped and just started to eat my food again. As if he wasn't even there, I didn't even want to give him the time of day.  I felt his eyes still on me and at some points he glanced back over to Harry.

"But thanks for bringing my stuff, saves me the problem of having to see you again", Niall then stood up and walked over to where the photo album was. He saw all the pictures of him with the girls, him with his family. He slammed the book shut and walked over to Harry. 

"Fuck you", he whispered at him before looking over to me, " And fuck you, Daisy. I am sorry for what I did to you but fuck you. Fuck you for coming back to him like I knew you always would."

Niall grabbed his keys from where he had set them on the table and slammed the door behind him as he left. 

U.N.I // Ed Sheeran