Chained by Destiny (Camren)

Chapter 11

~No, this is not your legacy~

Lauren’s POV

The boy’s eyes haunted my dreams, they dug into my soul, split it open and made it vulnerable to all the emotions. Remorse, self-hatred, fear, everything was absorbed. I jumped and sat up in the bed, drenched in sweat. I rushed my hand through my wet hair before glancing at my hands. There were no evidence of yesterday's events except from the traumatizing images in my head.

Then I looked further out in the room only to spot Camila sleeping with her head on the side resting it on her arms. The rest of her body was curled uncomfortably together on the floor. Her hair was messed up and in due to her position I could nothing but assume that she was exhausted. Her tiredness had not influenced her beauty one bit though, the sun shone through a gap in the clouds and highlighted her strong facial lines. I had to restrain myself not to pull her up to me, feeling her warmth. 

I sighed at the memory, nothing changed the fact that she was dating someone else. They were maybe not officially, but more than what we would ever be, and that hurt. I flailed out of bed and heard low sniffing from the smaller girl. She rubbed her eyes sleepy and looked at me, «Good morning Lauren.» She smiled, despite her experience of  the bloody and frightening event that occurred the day before.

«Morning.» I said nonchalant. She bit her lip nervously, probably uncertain about how to attack the fragile subject about yesterday. «What did I do?» She asked apprehensive while fiddling with her fingers. I frowned, even with her betrayal her biting her lip was more attractive than it should be. «Nothing. You did nothing.» I said looking past her and out the window. She let out a sigh, «Yes, I did. I can see it in your eyes.» She took a step closer and stroke her hand down my cheek.

«Your emerald eyes betray you Lauren. No matter what you claim they always reveal the real truth behind your words.» Her touch vanished from my face, but left a burning path after her soft hand. «Don’t you ever get sick of constantly keeping your guard up?» She asked while looking into my eyes. There were no pity or scorn in them, only tenderness. For a brief second I wanted to melt into her eyes, let everything go, but I couldn’t, not after yesterday. 

The eyes of the terrified boy never left my mind, his eyes were too familiar to Camila’s. Ignorant to the awful things that ravaged the world. Last night I had hurt him, or worse. I had no knowledge of his condition, maybe he was lying in a ditch somewhere crying for help or he bleed to death on the hotel floor, alone. If death was the result I recited a silent prayer that he was in a better place than where I would end up in.

There was nothing I could reverse or remove from the prevailing story, last night I’d hurt a boy, a boy younger than the girl in front of me. «Camaustin.» I spat out, trying to distract myself from the thoughts that punished my inner mind. «He’s your public playboy.» I vindicated while her eyes radiated consternation. «Austin is an acquaintance, that meaning can not be compared with you.» She confirmed leaving me muddled. 

«Lauren, last time we spoke about this you were the one that suggested a low profile.» She put pressure on the words us and gestured to the two of us. «Have you changed your mind?» She asked and switched the weight between her feet uncomfortably. «No, but there’s something else you should know.» She quirked an eyebrow and the relief that was present a moment ago was replaced by curiosity.

For the second time this morning I ruffled through my hair with my rough hand. I was nervous and it was about to take overhand, but I couldn’t. Hearing the truth changed nothing, I was still a monster and I would do everything in my power to keep her out of the mess I’d created. «A boy, he jumped me from behind. I’d taken a knife from him before..»