Pleasure

Chapter Eighteen

I watch Jacob intensely as he struggles to word his sentence carefully.

"So, the other night I guess you didn't ask as many questions as you wanted. I see it in your eyes, you're curious. So I'm just going to tell you okay?" I nod, taking in every word not even wanting to blink. He takes a deep breath in before pausing and saying, "Courtney."

"Courtney and I dated on and off a while back. We had gone to school with each other for quite some time and then things got serious between us. I liked her, but then she started to change. She made new friends and got drunk every weekend and slept around. I didn't really want to be associated with that kind of life. I broke up with her but she knew me so well. I showed her parts of me that I shouldn't have, and we just kept coming back to each other. I took her to this bar my uncle owns. He always let us get in because I was older and he told me 18 was closer to 21 than 16.

"She ended up cheating on me in the bathroom with some guy. I got so mad I beat the living shit out of the guy and left them both. The next day at school, all these rumors started about how I'm crazy and obsessed with her. No one knew the truth so everyone assumed her story to be true. I wanted to fight it for a minute but I realized, Courtney's just a bitter bitch. I know what she wants, and that's clearly me. She just doesn't realize her issues. And I wasn't going to deal with them anymore. But what we had was nothing compared to what I feel for you. I don't know, maybe she sees that and that's why she's jealous. But I promise you, you're all I want and need."

I come up speechless. I can't imagine Courtney and Jacob in this life, or even the next one. But from the sounds of it, his description matches Courtney perfectly. He's pleading his case, and that's something I can appreciate. I just pray it's the truth.

"Okay." Is all I manage to say. He looks at me hoping for something more, but I come up empty handed. He laughs and looks down at the ground. His laugh almost sounds as if he's hurt, not amused. 

"Sorry to ruin the mood, I just had to get that off my chest." He admits, mumbling and fiddling with his fingers.

"Thank you, Jacob." I say. He looks up at me with wide eyes. "For speaking the truth, thank you. You didn't ruin the mood, I'm just ... I don't know, shocked or caught off guard or something." He nods and noticeably swallows a lump in his throat. I let my eyes wander his body until I stop on his biceps. His muscles look so defined through his shirt. The same dirty thoughts I had before begin to resonate in my mind again. I bite my lip and lust come over me. I don't know what he does to make me so attracted to him.

"Why are you staring at me like that?" Jacob asks cockily, even though I know he knows the answer. I smile and bite my lip, aware of the reaction it brings out of him now. He slyly smirks and looks at me up and down.

"Last time we were in this bed," he starts, moving closer. "You told me you didn't want me to leave. What do you want this time?" I lick my lips and think of what to say.

"Lay down." He instantly stands up and crawls into bed next to me. I climb on top of him, catching him off guard, and he looks at me in a perplexed manner. I pull hair behind my ears before pressing my hands against his bulky chest and bringing my face closer to him. I can feel his heart begin to palpitate against my fingers as my lips slowly approach his.

I smile before pressing my mouth to his lightly. He doesn't hesitate to kiss me back, freezing his entire body. He brings his hand to the back of my neck, pulling my head closer until there's no empty space between us. I take a handful of his shirt into my fist and moan softly onto his lips. He grabs my hips hard, letting the same butterflies erupt throughout my body. I feel excitement reign over my body as sparks ignite every time I disconnect then reconnect my lips to his.

I begin traction between our hips and he instantly stiffens his body. I try going faster but it doesn't feel right so I slow down and close my eyes, taking in the feeling of his body against mine. I feel his cold breath hit the brim of my mouth while we silently pant into each other's presence. He starts to take control, gripping my waist harder and moving it back at forth for me. The thick layer of clothing we have on becomes seemingly thin in the act of our bodies melting into each other. I bring his hands to my chest and he stares up at me with lust filled eyes. He hesitates before squeezing lightly. Our hips never disconnect in these moments.

I want him. I want him more than I've ever wanted anything and the way his body feels against mine is unfathomable. I can't resist wanting this and wanting him. I want him in every way and I want him to want me in every way.

I dip my face into his neck and begin planting soft kisses on his smooth skin. He gasps for air and lets his hands run up my back, back and forth. I don't stop moving my hips and I can tell he likes it when he lets a mouse-like moan escape his lips. Without hesitation, my fingers slither down his pants button and pick at it. He immediately grabs both of my hands with one of his and looks up at me with wide eyes.

"I can't, Aria." He murmurs shamefully.

"Are you on your period or something?" I laugh but I'm actually noticeably disappointed. I've never had sex before but I got so lost in the moment that if he wouldn't of stopped me, I would've done way more than I planned to tonight.

He laughs bitterly and sits up, automatically pushing me off of him. He swings his legs off the bed and slouches his shoulders. "No, I just ... we can't."

"Why not?" I inquire out of curiosity. I begin to fear that I moved too fast. Maybe I scared him.

"Just not yet, okay? I told you, I want to take things slow." I frown and stare off at the wall. I feel let down, or rejected, and it's not a good feeling. "I want to." He continues, biting his lip and scanning my body up and down seductively. "I mean look at you. God, I want to but..." He trails off with a concentrated look in his eyes. I don't say anything, although I'm hoping he will say more. I don't understand him sometimes. It's almost impossible.

"I think I should take you home," Jacob rises to his feet, fixes his jeans, then grabs his car keys and looks at me with an awaiting expression.

I sigh and bite my lip. "Okay."