Pleasure

Chapter Fifty-Two

Today is the day I return to school. I haven't been there for a while, my teachers probably forgot about me. I wear a hoodie because I'm starting to show a bit more and although, my pregnancy won't stay a secret for long, I do want to keep my business to myself for as long as I can.

I walk out of the bathroom and see Jacob standing near the door with his keys and phone in his hand. He looks up at me and smiles, infatuation flooding his eyes.

"Ready Freddy?" He asks, giving my shoulder a comforting rub.

"Ready ready." I reply, even though I'm not that ready. I feel like I've got a big sign above my head that says hey world, I'm pregnant let's talk about it.

I'm not sure when I'm going to tell more people, but Jacob says I don't need to rush it. I just have this weight on my chest from it, it bothers me so much. I feel like if I at least told my family, I would feel much more comfortable telling others.

Jacob can tell I'm thinking too hard. He nudges me and gives a soft smile before asking, "You all right?" I nod simply, looking down at the floor and pulling my bottom lip in.

The drive to school was a silent one. I can see Jacob watching me out of the corner of my eye, but I never look his way. He wears concern on his face beautifully and he doesn't even know it. Sometimes I look at him and watch as the guilt picks at his brain and makes a home there, decaying and rotting and haunting. He tries not to let it affect him but I see.

When I walk into school, Jacob throws his arm around me. It's almost as if he's protecting me from the thoughts of the other students. I know they don't know but it still feels weird to be back here.

I go to my locker and put in my combination. When I open it, a little letter falls from the top shelf. Jacob and I look at each other, then down at the note. He bends down to get it and hands it to me. Before I can unfold it to read it, my stomach churns uncomfortably. I grab it and draw into myself.

"Hey," Jacob whimpers, leaning towards me. "You okay?" He asks, rubbing my arms. I nod, feeling a small amount of uncertainty.

"Hey." Natalie's voice chirps behind us. I turn to look at her and smile faintly. "I see you got my letter."

"Yeah, thanks." I wave it up for a moment, although I never got to read it. I stuff it in my back pocket and shut my locker door.

"Think I could steal her for the day?" Natalie asks Jacob, already looping her arm in mine. Jacob smiles and nods. He leans in to plant a soft kiss on my forehead. I start to walk away, but his deep voice stops me.

"Hey, call me if you need anything." I nod once. "I'm serious, Aria, anything." Natalie nudges me towards the other end of the hallway. I don't look back this time, but I know he's standing there watching my figure disappear.

The day progresses quickly but the pains in my stomach continue to worsen. I want to tell Jacob about it but I don't think much of it. I've never been pregnant, nor have I been around pregnant women so I assume since another life is growing inside of me, it must be normal.

After school, I meet up with Jacob at my locker. I grab my things and begin to trudge to his car. I feel a tightening in my stomach, almost worst than the previous ones combined. I whine and clench my stomach. Jacob reaches for me but I seem to hit the ground faster than he can catch me. I'm immediately engulfed in a pain so unbearable it makes me scream at the top of my lungs. I hear Jacob calling my name, but it sounds far and faded. All I can think about is this pain. I curl my body into a fetal position and lock my hands in between my thighs. I feel a warm liquid on the palms of my hands. I look at my hands and see the dark red liquid dripping down my wrists. I begin to lose myself in the choppiness of my breaths.

"Aria, look at me." Jacob says, grabbing my face. I can't concentrate, and nor can I breathe. I try to hold his gaze but my eyes keep revisiting the blood on my body. I feel the same pain in my stomach once more and clench my entire body.

"Aria, you're hyperventilating." Jacob grabs my face. "You have to breathe, Aria. You have to go to the hospital, okay? We're taking you the hospital." He keeps telling me I'm going to be okay. I want to believe him. I want to believe those words, but the pain surrounds me like cold air clinging to bare flesh.

And I know I'm not going to be okay.