This is me

Untitled Part 31

Hey!

In case you've read this story or this part or whatever or maybe someone told you about this, I just wanted to say.... drum roll pleaaaase!!!! 

THANK YOU! 

I mean it. 

Thank you for choosing me. Thank you for trusting me (even though sometimes I'm having white lies haha!) Thank you for the support. Thank you for fighting along side with me. Thank you for fighting your love for me. Thank you for loving me even though you're hurting. Thank you for letting me be the person I can be. Thank you for letting me feel that I can be free. Thank you for saving me when I almost committed suicide (you may not know that). Thank you for letting me experience life about taking risk.

Thank you.

But I'm also sorry.

Sorry. Sorry for loving you this much. Sorry because you're being sorry about this. Please don't. In the end I might just think that this is all my fault. Even though I know and I believe that this is no ones fault. We just fall for that love thing. So I'm sorry. I'm sorry if ever you feel something that is wrong whenever you see me. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry but still, I'm thankful.

I'm thankful that atleast I get to experience having a relationship to whom I can say, one of the best people I've met. Although we didn't last long , but still I'd take you as one of those people who saw the real me at some point. Who saw what I can really do and what I can prove to those people who underestimate me. Who encourages me to continue fighting for what's right.

*****

One time we had our assembly at the gymnasium and in there I saw you. I suddenly looked at you and smiled without even noticing. In there I thought that I really missed you, of course hindi mawawala yan. But at that moment what I only said was that

"I'm thankful"

I am thankful. So much. I am thankful for you. But I am most thankful to God for giving me a friend like you. For giving me a companion like you. For giving me the person who'll see me as me.

Because you know?

Without you all those months, maybe I'm the different Sam you all know when you see me again.

I might self destruct any minute without your help and support.

I might have committed suicide that day if it weren't for you.

I might have gotten a bad temper if only you didn't let me calm my mind and only cleared my mind to dark memories.

I might have disappoint those people who is counting on me if it weren't for you.

***

You know what, Bruh? They kept on asking me why you. Of all people why you?

And I just said, "Because it's you..."

**

You know, there are some people who admires me for being strong all these months. For smiling and be that postive optimistic girl they know even though I'm hurting. Even though I'm hurt because of my friends. Even though I'm hurting because of you. But please don't feel bad.

And how they admired me for making this story.

*****

I made this story that is most likely to be about you and me and you again to finally say that this will be the end. I just want to say everything before I let you go emotionally, mentally, and maybe literally. HAHA

I want to end it with a dot. Without any more regrets. Without any worries. But with feeling of satisfaction. With feeling of breathing the same air as you without being awkward. With feeling of waking up without missing your morning greetings and let's me know what you'll do at that time. That I can live without a missing piece. Without missing everything about you whenever I see you. 

I'll end it feeling happy and proud.

*****

If you could go back to the past, who would you want to meet and why?

"Ms. Martin you answer the question"

"Him...? Because if I were given a chance to go back to the past, I want to start it right. In a right time, right situation and right decision"

*****

"Maybe there are times that you need to let go of something for you to truly know the true meaning of it... Maybe this time is not the right time but there will come a time that you and the things that you had let go in the past may come right back at you and they will suddenly approach the same way you did with them. Maybe not now but there will come a time they'll be standing right in front of you or next to you."

-creds to my friend 😘

**

Good bye, Bruh!

-Your Bruh!