I couldn't ask for life to be going any better than they were after being engaged a year during some time off back in February Bri and I decided to go Vegas and get married Briah had no relationship with her family they hated me so we knew if we had a wedding they wouldn't attend with exception of her brother Parker who visited whenever we were home so Vegas it was..naturally we told my mom and Jared on the plane ride there with their blessings of course...it felt good to escape Los Angeles for a couple days but here we are back on the road having hit Russia, Austria, Poland, and France a nice working honeymoon as I called it...today we were in New York found Briah going through some possible designs for me for Black Fuel..my baby really our baby...I pressed a kiss to her cheek as my hands rest on her hips "Mrs Leto.."
Briah smiled slightly "Shannon.."
I smiled "What we got here?"
She sighed "Trying to figure out the shirts...the Black Fuel Trading Company and the Black Fuel with the rose shirts have sold amazing...I'm just trying to come up with something."
I pressed a kiss to her shoulder "I know baby but don't drive yourself crazy over this."
Briah nodded "I know..."
I reached up closing the book "Now how about you pay a little attention to your husband this can wait."
She sighed softly "Shannon..."
I nuzzled her neck "I love you."
Briah turned facing me "I love you.."
I nodded with a smile "Want some coffee?"
She shook her head "Already had a cup."
I nodded "So when are we going to talk about this Briah...you had a miscarriage it's not just something that happened babe we lost our baby."
Briah pulled from me "I hate that...lost..it wasn't my keys, phone or some fucking object it was our baby Shannon our baby."
I watched her we had found out she was pregnant when we were in Poland she was about 5 weeks of course we were estatic unfortunately a couple days after we returned home to LA Briah miscarried...she was devastated as was I but I kept it together for her but she hasn't cried she just closed herself off..I sighed..."Baby.."
She looked at me those beautiful blue eyes full of so much hurt and sadness it killed me "Shannon.."
I just pulled her into my arms holding her as close as I possibly could "I'm here baby I'm here."
Briah gripped my shirt and finally let it loose she cried into my chest "It's not fair.."
I buried my nose in her hair comforting her the best I could...I never felt so helpless in my life sure it was my baby too but I wasn't the carrying it...I didn't have to go through what she did..."I know baby but listen to me we have all the time in the world to try again right now we need to heal...when you're ready we'll try again.."
She sniffled slightly "I feel like I did somethinf wrong."
I moved taking her face in my hands "No you didn't this was something neither of us could of prevented...if I could change this baby I would in a heartbeat.."
Briah took a deep shakey breath "I'm sorry.."
I shook my head "Never apologize to me about something like this...I'm hurt too but you went through more than I ever could...as your husband that's what I'm supposed to do."
She nodded "Are you okay?"
I nodded "I will be."
Briah moved back into my arms "What if we can't have kids?"
I sighed softly "Doc said everything was fine nothing should prevent us from having a healthy baby."
She nodded "I heard him I'm asking what if I can't give you that...there is always that chance Shannon."
I nodded "Then we'll look I to other options adoption a surrogate..I'll do anything I need to do to make sure you have all you dream about."
Briah nodded her fingertips gripping my shirt "I love you.."
I nodded pressing a kiss to her hair "I love you too..."
She sighed "Can we go eat I'm starving...and I actually want to see people."
I nodded "Anything you want."
Briah moved from me wiping her face "Okay.."
I gently took her face in my hands pressing a light kiss to her lips "I love you."
She smiled softly "Even when I'm a crying mess?"
I nodded "Even when you're an overly emotional crying mess...I love you with all I have."
Briah smiled "I love you too.."
I chuckled softly "C'mon lets go eat."
She checked herself in the mirror then picked up her stuff."Okay."
With that we left..after a nice lunch we walked through the city I lifted her hand pressing a kiss to it "You okay?"
Briah nodded "Slowly but surely."
I nodded "We'll be okay when the time is right we'll have our family."
She smiled softly "I know baby.."
I wrapped my arm around her shoulders pulling her closer to my side as we walked...I stopped walking tilting her head up "I love you baby."
Briah smiled "I love you."
I smiled pressing a brief kiss to her lips...this was going to be a hard year for us both but with each other we would get through this
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