Look Away, Ignore the Pain

Chapter 12: Good Enough

~Kaitlynn’s Point of View~

“Good luck on the rest of your tour and tell your footballer mate I said happy belated birthday!” Dad laughed and hugged Niall as he was about to get in the car with Paul. I was standing right there with all three of them, but no one actually seemed to care much for my existence, so I went back to house.

“Hey Kathy,” Paul called after me. I turned around to face him and he gave me a beckoning smile, so I walked closer to him. “I have a Christmas gift for ya.” He said happily and laughed a little when I gave him a confused look. Niall and Dad were shocked, too and I could tell Dad wasn’t too happy about this man trying to be nice to me in a way a father should. Well, you know what, Dad? I don’t care! Paul seems to be the only one here that actually wants to make me smile… or at least seems to… When I was just about a metre away from him, he pulled me into a bear hug, which caught me well off guard, but I wasn’t going to argue with the only hug I got from someone who’s not Sophie or Tom. When we pulled apart he handed me a small box about the size of my palm, wrapped in black and white stripes like a piano. I smiled slightly and he urged me to open it. I shyly opened the small box to find a small silver treble clef necklace. I looked up to meet Paul’s proud eyes. “I’ve been told you play piano, so I went with musical stuff. Do you like it?” he asked happily. I nodded slowly with my jaw wide open, still from when I received the wrapped box. I didn’t know what else to do, so I just wrapped his neck with my arms, hissing quietly from the impact of the contact on my fresh cuts, and being careful not to drop my new present.

“Thank you.” I mumbled into his neck. Since this was the only thing I’ve said since I yelled at Niall and I didn’t really bother making any sound aside from that, it hurt. My throat was tightening and I couldn’t help my cough, so I pulled apart and coughed like a fucking smoker.

“Are you alright, Love?” he asked me worriedly. I nodded slightly and gave him an assuring smile.

“Katy, are ye okay?” Dad asked, but didn’t have the same worried tone as Paul. I didn’t even nod my head to him. I wish I could just go back to England with Paul. He seems to care about me more than anyone here. I thought bitterly to myself.

“Niall, are ye ready yet?” Paul asked and motioned Niall to get in the car. Niall nodded and stepped in, quickly closing the door after him. “Bobby, do you want me to take her with us? It would be a shame if she’d have to get a taxi in London all by herself to get to the school, ye know…” Paul offered Dad. Yes, yes, yes, and more yeses! Please Dad!! I begged inside my head. I could tell Dad wasn’t too comfortable with the situation, so I decided to plead to Paul with my eyes. I could also tell he knew just how much I actually wanted to stay here.

“The school’s closed during the holidays.” Dad said simply and my heart sank. I think I even showed my despair physically, since Paul tensed up a little.

“You know, I have a small flat just around the lads’ complex in the middle of London. I could just have her there and since the next few performances are around England, she could just join up or chill back at my flat. She seems responsible enough for that.” I carried wide, shocked eyes at Paul. This was beyond anything I’ve expected anyone to say.

“But you’re traveling all over England. Surely you can’t expect it to be alright with your manager.” Dad tried to counter. Honestly, Dad, why do you give a damn? Ever since I’ve came you haven’t even taken my presence into account. I don’t think you even know I’m alive unless I do something that captures your attention. Admit it, compared to Niall and Greg, I’m nothing. I thought bitterly. No, fuck it. I’m old enough to choose for myself. I ran back into the house, up the stairs, and into my room. In two minutes I had all of my things packed and I shot myself down the stairs again. “Where the hell are ye goin’?” Dad asked, shocked by my sudden behaviour. I didn’t even notice and instead, I just clutched to my small luggage and tightened my grip on the backpack that had my laptop and blanket in it. Paul gave me an assuring nod with a warm smile and I returned a shy one.