Pain 2: Him (H.S)

Chapter 4

Harry's POV:

"I need some clothes." I toss and throw all of Conor's folded shirts trying to find something decent to wear. I don't have time to go home so borrowing is my only option right now.

"C'mon Harry, I just fixed this shit." He picks up the bundle of shirts and refolds them, bending down in front of the open drawer to neatly place them in. Loser.

The sun is blinding me and I can't find the stupid remote to control the shades. Everything is controlled by one. This kid is too damn spoiled and my eyes are sore from the brightness.

This is the first time since the break up that I woke up without wanting to go back. I have so much to tell her, so much I need her to hear and the only thing I'm afraid is, is her turning me down. I was high as shit last night but my mind fully comprehended everything she told me. She said she loved me, but I've already convinced myself that she lied. She probably only said that to shut me up and only agreed to hang out with me to officially tell me to leave her alone. She didn't say it back like she usually does before she ends a call. Is that a sign or something? I don't know. I'm already losing my fucking sanity without her, I'm just aimless at the moment.

"Here," Conor tosses me a dark red colored shirt and walks to the door. I'm no fashionista, but everything he owns is preppy and 'appropriate' and I might need to take him to buy some new clothes. Hell, I'll even pay for it myself even though he can afford the whole mall plus every other one in the city. His sense of style makes me want to gag.

"That's the ugliest shirt I've ever seen." I can't believe he wears shit like this. "Don't you have a white t-shirt?" I should fuck up his drawer again just to piss him off but I'm already running out of time

"Don't you think it's time you change your style? Same jeans and t-shirt since last year." He laughs throwing the ugly shirt at me.

I like my style. It's simple and Alee loves my white shirts and warn out jeans. Plus, it's better than those ridiculous button downs. "I don't want to see her looking like a fucking potato."

"Well, it's either this or Polo's. Your choice."

"Harley likes your Polo's?" I pull my dirty shirt off that smells like stale cigarettes and faded cologne and put on the Tide scented tomato shirt.

I smoke now. Almost a whole pack a day but I won't tell her that. Speaking of cigarettes, I could really go for one right now.

"Yeah, she loves it." He smiles. I've known Conor for years and I've never seen him this happy with a girl. He usually switched a lot but he seems to really love her and it's amusing seeing him so whipped and put in place. He obeys her like a little dog, falls to her command every time and basically meets her every needs no matter what it is. I shouldn't be talking shit since I was the same way with Alee. "You look fine man, you should shave a little though."

"No, she likes it." I stand in front of the mirror and strangely, I look okay. I rub my stubble and smile just thinking about that time she wouldn't stop playing with it. She had always loved it. That and my long hair.

"Alright well, brush your hair. When was the last time you washed it? You look like you dipped your head in oil." He scrunches his face tucking his wallet back into his pocket. He's always talking some shit about my hair when his smells like ass and cheese.

"Fuck you. Get out." I dodge my dirty shirt at him but he shuts the door before it could touch him. He's my only friend I have now, the only one I can trust now that Niall is gone. I'm glad that he is. Son of a bitch was a coward the whole time and ended up just like everyone else.

In all honesty, I look like complete shit. I haven't shaved, showered, I smell like drugs, my skin is rough, and on top of that, the bags under my eyes makes me look even more disgusting but I want to see her as soon as possible. I don't want to waste any time I have with her even though I look like I slept in the gutters so cologne will do for now. I'm going to take her to a pizza place Downtown and maybe go for a walk down Kelly Drive by the Delaware River. I took her there once and she loved it. She said it was her favorite place so hopefully she won't protest and change the plans. I'm nervous though because I don't know what's going to happen. I know she won't let me touch her and that's driving me insane because that's all I want to do right now; hold her and kiss her and fucking give her the love she needs; the love I took away.