Good To Go (camren)

4

           

The next few days were rather emotional for Lauren. Things with Camila had been much worse with the two conversing much less now, and her trying to distance herself from the son that she had known to love all this time. Figuring that it would be much easier to leave the boy with some sort of distance between them, Lauren was a mess on deciding what to do next, along with the fact that their anniversary was just around the corner.

It was then the night of their anniversary and Lauren chose to stay behind at work to avoid reminiscing in the four walls of their home. For the past 9 years now, Camila and Lauren had always celebrated their anniversaries in hotels, out on a holiday to commemorate the sanctity of the occasion. However, things started to change when Lauren had brought up the thought of trying for a second child through a donor. The thought never sat well with the brunette especially with the thought that she never had anyone to share Jacob's milestones with especially on late nights when it was a struggle to even get Lauren pick up the phone. When things changed and she found herself falling into the company of new people, the abrupt change of having a child to call hers and someone's, along with sharing those milestones seemed so beautiful and convincing that the life she was living was far from what she was promised.

Sitting on her executive desk, Lauren called over Normani to celebrate the evening with her. She was definitely considering losing the battle to alcohol that evening, to drown herself from the misery that she was feeling. It had been 3 days since Camila had handed her the documents which she reluctantly took, but never signed until this evening.

"Take it easy on the alcohol, Jauregui. You're still driving home." Normani worriedly warned her best friend.

"What an irony it is that I have a home but live in the office? Ironic that I have a wife that I'm on the verge of losing, when all I've ever dreamed of was her loving. Funny how on the night of my anniversary, I'm tucked away in an office signing divorce papers." The raven-haired chuckled at the pang it sent to her chest as she verbalized her miseries.

"You don't deserve this, Laur. You never did. It's high time to think of yourself, don't you think?"

"All these years I've given her everything I thought she could have wanted. I gave her a home, everything designed to cater to her needs. Now even on the brink of losing myself, I still find myself caving in to what she wants." She sighed in defeat. Through whatever, it was always Camila first.

"It's time to man up and make wise decisions for yourself, don't you think?" Normani uttered as she caressed the back of her best friend. "I've got you, Lauser. You're never alone."

"You're right, Manibear. I guess it's just sinking in that in the next few hours I'd be losing my family." Lauren sighed as she downed the bottle of beer that was on the edge of the table. It would have been such a pain to lose both her wife and the child she had learned to love over the years, but she knew that if it was what her wife wanted, she'd offer her whole heart to cater to what would make her wife happy.

Arriving home at the wee hours of the morning, Lauren walked over to the Jacob's bedroom to enjoy the last few moments she'd be having with her son. She knew that she had to make this trip to his bedroom quick, else she might just cave in and sob at the thought of having to leave him behind. Approaching the headboard of his bed, Lauren had kissed his forehead softly, but far too long for her liking that tears started to pool in her eyes. "I love you so much, Jake. I love you that I can't have you grow up see this. I'm sorry, baby. Mami loves you. Don't forget me." She silently sobbed as she had forced herself to walk away from the room.

Now onto what had to be done, Lauren went back downstairs to grab the Manila folder she had brought home from the office. Knocking on what used to be hers and Camila's bedroom, the raven-haired girl dreaded what she was about to do. It was far more painful to have the gush of memories from the first time she had ever laid her eyes on the brunette, but she knew better and brushed off the thoughts that were about to overtake her decisions. She took one deep breath before entering the bedroom, walking over to her sleeping wife on the bed.