☾A wandering, surreal, reader-insert fanfiction for $uicideboy$ fans☽
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..."You heard Ruby scoff to himself, 'This part of the world sorta attaches itself to people... Maybe ya belonged here... I've lived by the Causeway Bridge for as long as I can...
Author Note: AH YES, HELLO MY LOVELIES. I hope y'all are ready. Honestly, not a lot of $B fanfiction out right now, and only some is really quality. I'm gonna be touching on Ruby AND $crim, so every one of you trash-hoes gets what you want. (TBH, I've been screaming in the pre-writing and I love all you guys.)
The air was perfect that night, so you ran down the streets and cut through the darkness.
The pursuit of yourself had led you to Texas lately for the warm dry air. No house, but not homeless. You had everywhere to go instead of nowhere. You'd decided on this journey rapidly after getting a college degree and stuffing funds under your belt from heaps of dead end jobs. And tonight, in Texas, the world was beautiful. The night wasn't sweltering but didn't give you any goosebumps. You'd come down from the northern part of your journey as November began to take bitter grips. Texas wasn't exactly where you saw yourself ending up, but the train you hopped on kept chugging along until it halted right in Dallas.
You dashed around a nondescript building and felt a vibration in your feet. Somewhere, music was blaring in the city. You felt yourself out and decided to chase the sensations. As you drew closer, a pale realization swept over you. You knew the music too well. It felt ingrained in your brain and soaked throughout your blood. Your feet led you to Texas's House of Blues. The building was beautiful and full of rustic aesthetics mixed with dazzling Vegas-related lights. The music inside spoke to you, because you'd been fans of the performers for ages.
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You snuck around back, knowing you would never get in. Instead, you searched for the nearest foothold, which ended up being a maintenance ladder, and shot up to the roof. The music buzzed under your feet the moment you stepped onto the roof. The world was silent around you but achingly loud below you. The noise of traffic and conversations all but faded into obscurity, but the crisp hum of the music clearly echoed upwards towards you. The bass pulsated, but then came in the voices. You had never heard them live before, despite your pitiful attempts as a teen. A deep whirring voice cooed and then bit down on the air below you, followed by a harsh growl and smooth purring. Your body swayed with surrealism. They were playing here tonight? $uicideboy$... So you laid down immediately and rolled onto your side so that your ear was crushed into the roof. The words rolled off into you, you closed your eyes, and then became lost.
The world of rejection is brutal. Having to tip-toe around what is believed, what is said, and what is done becomes incredibly tiresome. To utter a dark word, or an obscure emotion is to discomfort everyone. To think anew about society and its values is to be a threat to the norm. To be any different is to be condescended upon by people who "know better". Society values optimism, faith, love, equality.... collectivism, mindlessness, control, deception, artifice, false idols...
Who was left to see where the line was drawn...? Were the good values worth it? Were the dark values understood? That was the $uicideboy$ core- the ripping apart of society's false values, good and bad. They dismissed the naïve faults of optimism, shredded faith, played down love, revealed the utter lack of equality, stood against collectivism, became aware of mindlessness, thwarted control, called out deception, ruined artifice, and fought false idols. As a result, they were influential, raw, and real; as a result, they were hated, rejected, and loaded with the connotation of fear.
