Double-Edged Sword - $UICIDEBOY$

Blood In A Bathtub

    Ghoste's car was freezing. Either that, or the slick of mud coating the entire lower half of your body was cold. He looked terrified of you when you opened the door and stared inside. The reflection in his window revealed that not only was your face dirty, but the welts from hitting thin branches in the forest had drawn blood. Thin rivulets of crimson ran down your face and left dried drops on your shirt.

"Y/N, what the fuck were you doing?", He asked while putting away his phone.
"Trying to not be a problem anymore."
His jaw clenched.

"Don't worry about getting the seat dirty since it's leather.", He tried to smile at you.

You shook in the car ride home. Home. That wasn't your home, so why did you call it as such? You didn't have a home for ages and suddenly deemed that house in hours as yours. Then, ruined it.
As you peeled some of the dry earth off of your elbow, Ghoste spoke up again, "Look... I gotta tell you some stuff and I dunno if I should. Their tour kinda made some tension between them. Usually they're so close that they're never apart. Shit right now is just tense, and they need to calm down and get back to their roots."
You blinked and curled up in the seat. The car turned into their driveway and Ghoste helped you out back towards the door. Everything inside of you screamed to not go back inside. Your feet kept tripping and your pulse galloped. Ghoste still firmly held your arm through it all and you felt cared for again. He opened the door, eerily unlocked already. The house lights were on, and Ruby's door was open. When Scrim stepped out of the room and looked at you, his eyes widened. You bared your teeth from the physical strain of facing reality. He took a step forward, then you narrowed your eyes and he stepped back. Ghoste put a hand on your shoulder and wished you a goodnight. You hardly heard him, your ears were fogged over.
Ruby moaned in the distance and caught both of your attentions. Scrim hurried back into the room, and you followed suite with your shoulders hunched. Even though your body felt alive again, you carried a heavy limp in your hips and your arms hung instead of swinging. Peering into Ruby's room, he was now half sitting up against the headboard of the bed. His face was rolling back and forth. When he looked up, he raised his brows.
"Someone found the devil?", He asked with a slurred tongue.
Chills raked your skin. His eyes, though sunken in and glazed over, focused on you. He looked like he had a faint memory of you, but was still shrouded in confusion. He was looking at you, from the other side. Scrim sighed heavily.

"You look..."
"I look like shit, I know. I'm gonna go clean up."

You clawed the mud from your skin in the shower. Slowly, your body reemerged from that earthy shell. You washed the welts on your arms and the cuts on your face gingerly. Somehow, over the course of minutes, you transitioned from showering, to laying on your side in water with the bathtub filled. You longed to find a space of existence void of words and eyes. Your head was turned just enough to keep your nose out of the water. You tried to mentally retreat, but the door opened.

"Y/N- look I don't want anything, but I needa talk to you. Look..."

You rolled over in Scrim's direction and stared up at him. He looked thinner and sunken in, even gaunt. He sat right down on the floor and put his hand in the rim of the tub. You half-way turned upwards and looked at him. His chest heaved.

"Look... tour is great 'n shit but it kills us. Before tour, this wouldn'ta happened. But.. look it's all my fault, you did nothing wrong. Remember when Ruby said he knew what it meant when I got nosy? Yeah yeah... I fucking just got in too close. Usually Ruby and I fuck hoes. We throw 'em around and kick 'em out. You ain't like that though. I ain't seen Ruby care about a girl in... years. He had his heart broke so many times man.. both of us had. Ion know what to do, cause you been so good to me too. Ruby could explain this better but, you got a gaze. And like, you got something that tells me you share this blood. Half of me feels like you belong here, but half me feels like it's curse to have you here- or any outsider for that matter. Ruby told me too, that you seem to belong here. He told me 'bout the bridge and how you had that urge to fuckin' JUMP. Shit man, only people like us get that urge."

You looked down into the bathtub and watched a scrape in your forearm continue to well up with blood and tint a space in the water.

"I... I just wanna wait it out. I have nothing to give.", you hunched over.

He was silent, gritting his teeth which were still adorned with blackened gold grillz. Something deep in his mind took root and his throat tightened. His heart seemed to tear before your eyes.

"I was gonna say that.. I didn't see what Ruby sees in you- to the point of lashing out like this. But like.. I can't say that cause now my ass is hurting too.", $crim looked away and sniffed hard.

You laid back down in the water and slipped under. Your eyes stayed open and stared into the bathroom, distorted by the lapping of the surface and a smoggy red hue. Tiny silver bubbles shot out of your nose and popped at the surface. Scrim's silhouette hung over you still, ungulating softly. Eventually, your lungs burned and you raised your lips to the surface. With your ears still underwater and unable to hear yourself, you spoke.

"I said to Ruby that I was ready for this ride, whatever it was. This is the ride. I wanna own it then. Throw me out or don't, but I want to live this life at its fullest. I don't want chains on my heart and smoke in my brain. I just... want what feels right. Coming here was a whole new world. I never got to have a chance like this."

Scrim's arms plunged under the water and wrapped around your back suddenly. For a thin guy, he still managed to lift you from the water with confidence. Your face laid on his shoulder while he walked you from the bathroom, feet dangling. You clung desperately to his body, wanting the moment to last. The water on your body soaked through his white shirt revealing the faint imprints of tattooed Hell. For someone who drew close to a demon, his current gaze held the impression of a guardian angel, struck down from the sky and damned to Earth. Your back brushed blankets, and you were then immersed in a comforter next to Ruby. He was on his side, curled up now in what looked like a deep sleep.

You glanced up at Scrim, confused.

"You two got shit to work out. But, he needs you right now more than me. That's for sure...", Something in his eyes glistened.

You tried to speak, but he left with the silence of a ghost and shut the door. The posters on the wall looked down at you, all expectant. Staring back at Ruby, you slid under the blankets and curled up in front of him, like you were mirroring his position. Your hands brushed his hair back and cupped his face. Understandably, he didn't wake at all from it. He continued to lay in a death-like sleep, gone from this world and its pain.

Ah, poor creature.

But you, you were but a poor creature too.

Scrim too.

Ghoste, Pouya.

You all were just poor creatures scraping yours lives from the floor.

You pulled the blanket up to your ears and continued to stare at Ruby's eyelashes which fanned out in a pristine flourish. You smiled softly and toyed with words in your head while pretending things were okay. A lock of his hair fell down on his cheek, and you quickly pushed it back again. The back of your mind recalled his real name. He'd never disclosed it to you, for one reason or the other. But, he didn't know that you'd been a fan for years. Clearly you knew his name.

    "Hurry back to us Aristos..."

His eyelashes fluttered momentarily, but again, he was gone.