pure fiction // ziam

thirty

⚠️ smut warning ⚠️
( also this chapter is really long )

I felt myself tangled in a web of lies that I had built myself. I can't seem to be able to talk about anything without having the need to constantly bring up the topic. And I know that if I do bring it up then it will eventually lead to a fight and that will eventually lead to not talking to each other and then that will probably be the end of us, the end of the best thing that happened to me. But I have to bring it up or else it's going to eat me from the inside out, not letting me sleep, not letting me think, not letting me do anything basically. It's like I was destined to be this way, and the choices that I have made only add on to that.

"Here you go" The cashier hands me my tray. The only thing I can rely on right now is food.

I sit down in the back of the fast food restaurant, away from the crowd, trying to hide myself as much as possible to avoid human contact. Aside from food being my only friend right now, I think loneliness has grown fond of me as well. Spending this time by myself before eventually catapulting into my emotional demise is actually quite effective, especially since there is no other person here to judge me than myself and that's already enough to take in.

I felt my phone vibrate and I check to see who it is.

Liam.

I had told him that before I would go home with him, I needed to do some stuff. He offered me ride but I declined the offer and decided to walk my way around town instead until I ended up here.

Liam: is everything ok ???

Liam: you know you can tell me anything right? you dont have to hide anything from me

I couldn't respond to him right now, doing so will only fuel the already rampaging fire that I caused.

As I was eating I felt the stare of an older guy deep into my skin. He looked a little older than me, around his mid-twenties, has a great set of brunette hair with light brown eyes that go along with it. He has a good looking face, and if I didn't already have feelings for anyone else I would maybe consider it. But the guy seemed to be determined as he signaled me to the bathroom as he stood up.

Now, what I do next will determine everything that will happen after I get out of this place. Should I continue on with my life and reject the offer or follow the mysteriously handsome male into the bathroom. My conscious is saying no but inside I could feel myself screaming yes, as if I should ruin myself even more.

I follow the guy into the bathroom.

Luckily the bathrooms here have a lock and we wouldn't get caught doing what's meant for he bedroom. I walk in and stand with my back against the wall meanwhile the guy washes his hands and looks at me through the mirror.

"Are we doing this?" The guy asked and I moved to the door, locking it and a smirk appeared on his face.

I can't believe I'm doing this.

• • • • •

"Where the fuck are you?"

"I think I might have gotten a little lost"

"A little lost? Zayn you've been gone for hours! I thought it was something quick. You could have told me and I wouldn't be looking like an idiot sitting on the doorstep to your house in the pouring rain"