PHAN ONE SHOTS

Please Dont Go

WARNING: SELF HARM/SUICIDE ATTEMPTS. TRIGGER WARNING

"Goodnight Dan," Phil smiled as he wrapped an arm around him. Dan held Phils hand and sighed quietly.

"Good Night, love."

Phil was asleep within 10 minutes. Dan sat up, unwrapping Phils arms from him. He looked down at the older boy sadly for what would probably be the last time. He bent down and kissed him softly on the cheek and then the forehead. He leaned his head on Phils for a second, the tears threatening to spill. He finally got up before he had the chance to change his mind. He left the note on the bedside table and walked out to the bathroom and locked the door. He grabbed the pills and slowly poured them into his hand. He looked down at the small pile and filled up a small glass with water.

"I'm so sorry, Phil..." He said before he poured the pile into his mouth and took a gulp of water. He fell against the door shaking. "I'm sorry..."

~28 minutes later~
Phil groggily woke up, feeling Dans side of the bed. He wasn't there. He sat up calling Dans name with his tired voice."Bear...?" He uncovered himself and walked to the kitchen. "No he's not in here," he thought. "The lights  off." He wondered around the flat for a minute before knocking on the bathroom door. "Dan? Are you in there?" He tried opening the door, but the knob just rattled. Panic started to settle in. He knew that Dan wasn't doing to well lately, but he'd been trying to help Dan. He rattled the knob again. "Dan open up... please." No answer. Phil reached up and ran his hand along the top of the door, looking for a spare key. His fingers touched something cold and long. He grabbed it quickly and unlocked the door, shaking. The door finally unlocked and he tried to push it open, but something felt like it was pushed up against it. "Dan?" The panic in his voice started to become more clear. He pushed a little harder and slid through to see Dan laying on the floor. "Oh my god, Dan!" He ran out and grabbed the phone. "Hello? Yes, my boyfriend is unconscious.. he's just laying on the bathroom floor." He started to cry. "Hurry please."

~Timeskip to when Dan is in the hospital~

Phil sat in the waiting room with his head in his hands. He sighed and shook his leg up and down. "Come on.." He thought. Suddenly he heard hurried footsteps toward him. He looked up quickly to see a nurse smiling wide. 

"Mr. Lester?" She smiled wide and wrapped her arms around herself. 

"Uh yeah. That's me. Is he okay?" 

"Oh him? I think so, I'm not too sure. He's going to be sick for a while. You can come see him now, though, Follow me." She smiled again and almost skipped down the hallway. 

Phil was disgusted and enraged. "How can anyone be so happy at a time like this? Dan is hurt. My Dan is in pain." He thought as he sighed and dug his fingernails into his palms. He turned into a small room with a bed in the center, and an angel laying in it. There was Dan, oxygen tubes in his mouth, IV's in his arm, sleeping. Phil bit back tears as he walked up to Dan and placed a soft kiss on Dan's forehead. It was hot and his hair was matted to his forehead. He pushed it out of the way and leaned his head on Dan's. "I'm so sorry, bear." He finally let a tear fall. "I'm sorry I wasn't enough to make you happy. I'm going to try so much harder." He kissed Dan's forehead, then moved down to his nose, and then his cheek. "I love you, Dan."

He sat down looking at the curly haired boy. Sadness and guilt overwhelmed him. Dan shouldn't have even tried to do this. He was supposed to be happy. Phil finally broke down and he curled up into a ball on the hospital chair. 

Dan might be about to die and it was all his fault.