Even Though You Won't Be Mine °rosé

ch; 18

°MORE MESS

Jungkook had been staring at her for a long time already much to her discomfort. He didn't notice. But she had glanced up several times to find him directly staring at her.

"What is it?" she bravely asked hours later now that they're alone in the library.

"Sorry?" He snapped out of his trance and answered.

"Apology accepted," she giggled as he only got confused. "I'm going to assume that you were spacing out thinking about your dad and coincidentally your eyes were on me. But to tell you, I got creeped out."

"Yes," he lied, fixing his textbooks and avoiding eye contact. "He's still in bed just as we saw last time we visited. He's recovering for now, but he still doesn't know about the company's state."

"I'm not good at comforting people Jungkook," she said in embarrassment, reaching for his hand across the table. "But you're not alone, alright? I'm here."

Jungkook gazed at her with happiness, grabbing onto her hand tightly. At that moment, he didn't know what exactly he was feeling. This is what everything's supposed to be.

"Roseanne!"

They both turned around to the source of the voice and found her lover smiling at them. Daniel's eyes dropped on their connected hands, his smiled fading.

"Hi!" Roseanne waved at him with her free arm. "Are you here to study with us?"

He cleared his throat and sat down beside her, eyes fluttering on their hands from time to time. This was the first he gave a mean glare to the boy and Jungkook did just the same, not letting go of her hands.

"Are you playing a game?" Daniel smiled, brushing it off. He wanted to trust Roseanne and that's exactly what's he going to do.

"Hmm?" Roseanne asked in confusion before realizing she was holding his hands. His gaze went almost cold when she let go and smiled at the newcomer, taking back his hand. "No. Jungkook needed comforting, he's going through a hard time at the moment."

"Ah, I thought you were having a thumb fight that went wrong," he chuckled fakely, not yet forgetting both of their looks while they held hands. "Or having a romantic moment," he muttered under his breath.

"Then that would've been wonderful," Jungkook crossed his arm and leaned back, a provocative smirk appeared on his face. "I got to tell you, Roseanne's hands are really soft. If you want to know anything about her, feel free to ask me because I know a lot, hyeong."

Daniel's hands instinctively reached Roseanne's, he didn't fail to see it. She gave Jungkook a what-are-you-trying-to-do look and he responded with a sweet smile, making the other boy's smile gone completely fake.

"I'm fine discovering things for myself Jungkook," he said, looking at him dead serious though his smile didn't disappear. "I'd rather know her through her, that's why we're dating, right?"

Roseanne was between them as they looked at each other menacingly. She wasn't stupid to be oblivious to the murderous looks they were giving to each other but before she could interfere, Jungkook had beat her to it.

"It'll going to take you long to know this so I'm going to tell you then, just this one," Jungkook leaned forward on the table on his elbows. "She looks really cute when she's sleeping, snuggled under those warm covers that you just want to slip in beside her."

Daniel breathed angrily, glaring at the smirking boy across the table. How could he know that? He was bluffing right? They're friends of course they see each other sleeping, but then, sneaking inside her room?

Before he could grab him and choke him, Roseanne had let go of his hand and stood up, grabbing the other's arm and dragged him out of the library.

"What the hell are you doing?!" Roseanne erupted in anger once they got out. "Are you trying to set him off?!Are you purposely telling him we're together? I thought we talked about this already."

"But we are together!" Jungkook snapped, hurt to why she was mad about it. He was just making him back off and what's wrong with that? They're engaged! "For the record, we are engaged Roseanne, set to marry next year. Tell me, why are you dating someone else when you're already engaged?!"

"It was forced Jungkook," she gritted her teeth, anger blurring her mind. "There you go, we're set to be married next year, so why don't you let me date someone I like for the meantime. I never dated anyone unlike you, everything is forced so don't tell me what I know! Do you have to ruin my happiness?"

"Funny," Jungkook smirked, heart beating in pain. "I try to make you happy every time I get the chance but the next day, I'd be back to square one. I don't know anymore Roseanne, you make me believe and hope you'd be there for me but in truth you aren't. You'd be there, but then he shows up and all you can see is him."

"That's not true!" She countered.

"Oh yeah?" He said, his expression turning cold. "Why are you worked up when I'm just trying to tell him the truth? Ah, because you like him, too bad you're engaged. I really don't get you, you make me feel like I'm important for once in my life other than my family. I guess it's because you don't have someone at the moment that you decided to play with someone willing to be played."

"You're just as important Jungkook," she said, looking at him. "But what you did was immature and childish. I'm sorry if-"

"I don't want to hear your apology anymore," he looked away, trying to stop the tears that wanted to come out at that moment. "We fight, we make up, I don't want to repeat the cycle again. I don't get how could I forgive you easily while I had to search for the world for something to show my sincerity."

Her mouth hung slightly open, taking in everything he said.

"Thanks for the comforting words the past days and earlier, it wasn't obvious that they were empty," he chuckled, obvious he was mad and hurting. "You can do whatever you want, date whoever you want as long as you want. I'm done hoping you would make me a priority just for once. I'm going back to myself before I met you, at least I was numb from everything."

"I meant everything i said," she grabbed his arm but he just pulled it back and walked away. "Jungkook! Jungkook!"

He didn't turn around, knowing he only said those out of frustration and over weighting problem about the company and his father. But he was damn to proud to take it back, he's just as himself, arrogant and cocky, proud and overbearing with vanity. Though he felt afraid for a moment that she could make him feel this hurt and angry.

Roseanne was left, trying to rewind everything. Was it empty words that she said all along? Was it all true? But she was too dumbstruck in a guilty way, and hurt. But did she deserve to feel hurt when she was the one hurting somebody else?

"He thinks I don't care about him," she mutters, tears falling down. "Was I deceptive with him?"

_____

[a/n]
i was in the mood
to write when this
scene popped inside
my head, in the middle
of climbing the stairs
when i was supposed
to do something
regarding school. but
i still don't feel any
regret since i get to
write another chapter.
but though i am kind
of a little uncomfortable
that i just wrote
their major fight.