Suicidal

Old Tree

Lee Yoonji

I woke up at exactly five. I did my things and went off.

I rode a train from here to my hometown. I sat beside the window and put my earphones. I looked out on the window.

It's still early and the sky was a bit gray and blue.

It's like how I feel right now.

I felt so uneasy.

I don't know what will happen when I get there. I'm not sure what will I act when I see them.

It's been a year since the last time I saw them.

Come to think of it.

It's been a year since I feel this kind of things.

After two hours, I'm in my hometown.

I took a bus to get where my home is. I got off the bus when I see the familiar road where my home is leading to.

As I got off. The familiarity gush through me.

As I walked, I remember my childhood.

I saw the park where I used to play with my sister. Where my mom and dad will look at us happily.

It's still early so I decided to went to the park and sat on one of the swings.

I looked at the sky and started swinging.

I remember, since I was a kid I really like the swings because every time I swing, it feels like I can reach the sky.

I also remember the little boy I used to play with.

I got off from the swing and went to the old tree near the lake.

This is where I met the boy I was talking about when I was six years old.

That day I was bullied at school because I always get praised. I cried a lot and sat here. I didn't want to go home early that day.

Then I heard a noise near me. When I looked up, I saw a little boy blowing on something. He just continuously blowing it and I heard sharp keys.

I looked at him playing and stopped crying. He noticed me looking at him and he stopped playing.

He looked at me for a moment and he smiled at me.

"Why are you smiling?" I sniffed and asked. He just smiled.

"Now, you stopped crying." And he walked towards me and sat beside me. I just stared at him.

He shyly looked at me.

"I... Um... I'm sorry... I don't like to see someone crying." He said and looked that at his fingers.

"That's why you... Play that instrument?" I asked. He looked at me and smiled brightly.

"Yup!" He happily said. I hold my knees near my chest.

"What is that?" I shyly asked.

"It's a harmonica." Then he showed it to me. I nod.

"But, why it sound bad earlier, if it's a harmonica. It should be sound nice." I simply commented. I got startled when he shouted.

"Hey! It sounded like that but I'm practicing!" Then I saw him pouted.

He's too cute so I laughed. Then he laughed too.

"What's your name?" I asked. He looked at me.

"I'm —" He was about to say his name but I stood up quickly when I saw the sky and I know it's getting late already.

"I'm sorry. I have to go home. My mom's looking for me." I said and he just smiled.

"Take care. And don't cry anymore." He said.

And I went home feeling fine that day.

The next day I went to the park again. I was hoping I can see him again. I saw him running to me.

Since that day, our friendship started.

It was summer and we play almost everyday. But then one day, I didn't see him anymore.

I went to the park that day, feeling excited because I'm going to play with him again.

But all I saw was a small box under the tree. I saw a letter and a harmonica inside when I opened it.

I knew it was from him. I opened the letter and silently read it.

Fairy,

I'm sorry, I didn't get the chance to say goodbye. I going back to my real home now. I was waiting for you but I really have to go.

Don't worry, you'll still be my only fairy. I hope this harmonica will make you smile even though I'm not there with you anymore.

I'm going to miss you, really. And I hope I can see you again.

Take care~

                                            Your Harmony

I know, it's so stupid but we didn't exchanged names. He just called me Fairy because of my fairy designed hair clip he see I always wore and I called him Harmony because he always carry his harmonica with him.

Well, what do you expect to a child. Of course, we like to give names to anything.

I looked at the lake in front of me.

I wonder if he still remember me.

My trail of thoughts was interrupted because of my phone. I reached it and I saw my mom's name. I inhaled deeply.

Okay, Yoonji. Let's go now.

And I answered the call.

[Thank you for those who still waiting for me... 😄😄😄

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