Joshifer - Summer

Chapter 12

Josh's P.O.V.

Chapter 12

I can't believe what I did. I can't even look at Jen without wanting to kill myself in guilt and anger. I am such an idiot. I talked to Liam and Sam about it. They tried reassuring me that it was an accident and Jen was fine, but it didn't sway me much. I can't take my mind off of it..

When we arrived at Disneyland everyone was so excited but I have to admit that morning had taken anything good and replaced it with awful. I could see a few bruises on Jens neck and I obviously knew it was my handiwork.

The rooms went: Jena and Willow, Elizabeth and Woody, Sam and Liam and then Me and Jen. They all had single beds apart from Liz and woodys room and me and Jens room *sigh*

But I knew I had to talk to her sooner or later, I couldn't put it off forever.

I sat down on our bed and started to unpack my suitcase. Jen had gone to the buffet with Willow. Since it was 3pm we were gonna unpack and then go straight to one of the restaurants. About 20 minutes later I felt the bed sink down next to me, Jen.

"Josh, I-" she started.

"Jen. No. I feel awful, I want to die, I want to kill myself because of the pain I put you through. You could have died because of me, I will never be able to forgive myself, you deserve someone so much better than me. I can't even look at you without feeling so much guilt Jen, I'm sorry." I said before taking a deep breath. I needed to get that out.

"No josh, listen. I don't care how bad you feel, you need to get over it now. It was a genuine accident. I shouldn't have turned out the lights out. It's my fault not yours, I just didn't need an ambulance and it would have ruined the holiday. But you don't need to feel bad at all. We are over it ok? We are gonna have a nice holiday and forget this ever happened alright?" She said, this is why I loved her. She wasn't afraid to speak her mind.

"Right." I said standing up. "Firstly, DO NOT even dare try to blame yourself.. It was my fault so don't even think it was you okay? Secondly, I don't know Jen, I am scared I will hurt you again. And I can't let you live in danger by being with me.." I looked down and a tear fell onto my lap.

Jen huffed and then said "look at me." I kept my eyes down and pretended I couldn't hear her. "Josh, look at me." She said once again, I looked up quickly then glanced back down suddenly. "Joshua Ryan Hutcherson look at me right this second." Jennifer demanded and she lifted up my chin and forced me to stare into her gorgeous blue eyes. "Get over it josh." She said with a smirk before leaning forwards and pressing her lips against mine. When she pulled away I smiled and said "I missed you jennykins."