Chpt 22 : Class Betty's POV

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Today was off to a good start, it was obvious considering the morning I had with Jughead, but throughout the day I kept remembering how emotional yesterday was. I was lost in my thoughts in class. Yesterday I almost died. I almost decided to take my own life. I pulled up my sleeve to peak at my arm, checking to see if there was really a red cut on my wrist. I pulled up the bandages to reveal my nasty cut from my failed suicide attempt. It hurt me to just look at it.

     I hated my life. Even though I didn't want to die I still did not enjoy myself. I was constantly thinking about how my life is crumbling into peices. My parents started going off on my after Polly got pregnant, so if terrified of what they will do to me and my baby once they find out. I don't really want the baby, but I didn't want to abort it and I wasn't comfortable for putting it up for adoption, which means I'm probably going to keep the baby.
     I then went on to thinking about what Chuck did to me. I didn't know what to do about it. I never wanted to tell anyone about it, but Jughead was right, he deserves to be punished. The one problem though would be the baby. If he wanted the baby, I couldn't imagine their life living with Chuck.

     I was lost in my thoughts and I needed a break from class. I raised my hand to go to the bathroom and I was let out the class. Feeling to need to cry, I quickly jogged to the bathroom. I turned into a stall and started crying. I'm that moment I was so confused on how to handle life. I had so many problems I had to try to fix, but I couldn't seem to find a solution.

     I heard the bathroom door open and heels clicking. I tried to be quiet and stay hidden, but that only made me cry more. "Betty? Is that you? Are you ok?" I heard a familiar voice say. It was Veronica. With a worried look on her face he peaks her head into the open stall I was in. She quickly wrapped her arms around me, being the most supportive friend.

     Even though Veronica didn't really know I was having family troubles, she still was always trying to help me. "What's going on? Do you want to talk about anything?" She said sympathetically. Taking a deep breathe to calm myself I said, "it'll be ok. Maybe we can catch up sometime." I felt bad for not telling Veronica even though she is really supportive. Veronica gave me a squeeze and told me "you should probably calm down and head to class soon, I'll text you." Veronica was right, I had been gone for at least 3 minuets and people would probably get suspicious of what I was doing.

     The rest of the day continued with me thinking of what I was going to do. I decided to not tell anyone about Chuck hurting me until I was 3 months pregnant and I would have a small bump, but still concealable. I was still feeling glum throughout the day and considering the event of yesterday, I wasn't feeling my best. I was walking home by myself when I saw a liquor store. I had never wanted to drink but I was so desperate to have something that would make me feel better. I've tried self harm and even suicide, so I wondered if drinking would help.

     I grabbed two bottles of vodka to hopefully have enough for the week. I thought I was going to have trouble buying them but it was really easy. I just made up a believable lie and bought them. I snuck into my room just incase my parents got home from their plane early. I unscrewed the kid to the vodka and took a huge sip. It tastes disguising but it was an escape. Even though I was pregnant I ended up drinking almost half of the 4 liter party sized vodka. I was so nauseous and had no clue what was going on. I ran to the toilet and threw up. I was so wasted and it was barely helping.

     I thought being drunk may help me to forget about everything going on but it still was there in the back of my mind. I took one last swish of vodka before I hid it. The next 3 hours consisted of me doing crazy things in my room and then running into the bathroom and vomiting. Then finally, after a while I crashed onto the bed and slept for a while.
     I was woken up by a call from Jughead, still somewhat drunk, forgetting what I was just doing. "Hello Juggie." I said with a slur in my voice. It would take a really dumb person not notice how drunk I was. "Betty are you ok? You sound funny." He asked.

     He seemed really concerned. "I've never been better" I said, sounding ridiculous. I then giggled a little because I sounded so funny. "Betty, are you drunk? You sound horrible." He said frustrated. "Why would I be drunk?" I responded, still sounding idiotic and obviously drunk. "Betty where are you, you sound wasted I'll come help you out." He said, still sounding angry, but I was drunk and didn't care that he was mad. "I'm at home right now, I just woke up." I said, even though I was drunk I still had some sense in me. "I'm coming over, don't drink anymore Betty, it's so dumb and you're pregnant." He said with a sigh. "Alright. Bye." I said and hung up. I sat on my bed laying down waiting for him to come thinking about how my life was actually falling apart.

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