Tom Holland/Peter Parker Imagines

Slowly | Peter Parker

The title sounds like smut I promise it isn't I swear to god I don't believe in.
-A
I gasped for air as he held his grip around my neck. A metallic taste crawled up my throat and I spat it at him.
He threw me to the floor and sighed, stretching his hands and making his fingers click. "You really are useless, aren't you?"
I scrambled at the floor to get up, but my legs kept giving way under the weight of everything, physically and emotionally. I've been abused so close to death every second I blink, but the emotional baggage of my responsibility, what caused this, how pathetic I feel, so many things dug a hole under my feet to make me drop with every attempted step.
"Get away from me!" I screamed and they just grinned. I could feel my body slip into the darkness. It's a fact that someone taking a fatal shot wouldn't hear the bullet go, because the sound of the shot travels slower than the actual object.
I felt a heaviness in my chest, and darkness grabbed at me instantly.

I woke up with a start, but I didn't sit up. In fact, I didn't do anything. My eyes just opened. I tried to move my fingers to turn off my alarm that I despise so much, but I couldn't. I tried to sit up. I couldn't. "What the-" I would have choked out, but I couldn't even stumble out the first letter. Is this sleep paralysis?
I kept up the attempts to move or speak, but each time it failed. I let myself sink
regretfully back into a nightmare. As soon as I did, I tried to shake myself awake, but my brain wasn't having any of it. I strolled around. Lights flash in my eyes and I'm in school on my first day. I can't even answer attendance without people staring at me, and I hate it. I quickly get used to not having my beaten up and dilapidated bag, instead having a locker. I can't open it, and someone helps with it. I thank them and they stutter out a "no problem!" It makes me chuckle and they go to leave. I ask them for their name. They said something "Parker" but I didn't hear the first bit, seeing as he was already jogging back to his friend. I later found out their names were Peter and Ned, but I never spoke to them, however funny or kind they seemed. I mean, Flash jokes about me being worthless, which apparently matched a "pathetic penis Parker."

Black surrounds my consciousness and it's me with my ex boyfriend that I broke things off with around five years ago. God, we were actually 11 then. I was young, but when I lived in Britain that basically meant we were a teenager. There were tears in my eyes. I was so angry with him, but I cared, so I kept getting annoyed at the voice cracking and the tears threatening to spill. "You. don't care!"
"Really?! I'm the only one that could care about you you selfish brat!"
"You just lower my self esteem all the time! You're toxic!"
"I treat you better than anybody would want to!"
"Get away from me. Now. If I ever see you again I swear to god-"
"What? You'll hit me? You'll hurt me? You couldn't hurt someone if your life was counting on it."
So I hit him. Right on the nose. It started bleeding and I freaked out, yelling out an "oh my god, I'm so sorry.." before quickly leaving the park and going home.

Colours flash and I'm finally shown when I first walked in the doors of my new home. I was around five at the time, and I was so glad to be adopted.
But that night I broke down, and out of habit I stayed in my room and quietly cried myself to sleep. I was so grateful, but it had finally settled in that I could have lived in the orphanage forever, and that my real parents didn't care. Thoughts linked to worries that linked to past rumours that travelled their way to my head. They were screaming at me and I was quietly sobbing in response. I was so young, I was only five. But I already knew how cruel the world is.

I've always imagined how they left me at the orphanage. Did they smile and put on a facade before turning around, leaving and letting out loud cheers and "WHOOP"s? Did they hand me in, leave and break down when they left? Did they wrap me in a blanket, put me in a box and leave me at the doorstep like the cliché movies I watch in my room with my best friend Liz?