I'm Not Okay (I Promise) • Geetrick

62

---Gerard---

"Many years have passed for this, but I'm afraid your time is almost up." Dad croons, his hand resting on my shoulder.

I look up at him, tears lining my eyes. Dad told me I've only been here for 22 days, it feels like it's been three years. Three years without Patrick. Three years without Mikey and Mama.

All I want is Patrick back. I want to hold him and tell him it will be okay. I want him to know I'm here. I'm just trapped. I want him to know that no matter how hard I try, I can't escape my own body.

"Are they..." I choke, "Are they gonna kill me?"

Dad pulls me into a hug, I can feel his tears drop down on my shoulder while his scent fills my nostrils. Maybe that's just the life support, but it smells like gunpowder and smoke.

"I wish I could have saved you." He whispers, "I love you and... I'll see you when you come back to me..."

I sob harder, "I don't want to die. Please, is there anything I can do? Anything you can do? Will I ever remember this?"

"I'm just a dream. It'll be okay. I promise... things will turn out fine..."

"It won't be fine, not if I can't see Patrick. Please. Can't you change something? I love him, I really do, Dad."

He pulls me close to his chest, my face buried in his shoulder as I cry, "I'm afraid I can't do anything, Gerard. I'm sorry. But you have to trust me, okay? You have to be brave. You have to be brave no matter what. Your broken promise doesn't matter. It's okay that you didn't go to The Black Parade. It's okay that you didn't do what I asked, but I need you to do what I ask now. I need you to keep calm because you are going to heal. You're going to get through this. You may not be with Patrick, but you're going to be with me. I'll help you every step of the way."

I shudder, goosebumps rising on my skin, "Promise?"

"Promise."

Deep breath.

It's going to be okay, Gerard...

It'll all be just fine...