The DarkNess Within Him | ✔

Chapter Forty Five

The wind that attacks me is cold, hitting me sharply from all angles and forcing my gaze to dip downwards. Carter lays n the ground, lifeless. He’s dead.

My best friend is dead.

I killed him.

Murderer.

Mer rushes over, her eyes never meeting mine even when she leans down to touch Carter. She leans down to shake him and I only take an instinctive step back, my heart starting to pound wildly. I lift up my hands, noticing how they are shaking when I see the blood all over them, tainting them.

Everything hits me at this point. The pain all over my body slowly starts to come back at the same time my eyes shift back to normal. Everything shakes, my body vibrating uncontrollably especially my legs that want to do nothing more right now than to give way due to their lack of strength.

I stare down at Vicky and let out a gasp. When my eyes find Carter again, I fall to my knees.

I killed him.

I drag my knees through the grass to Carter, each breath I take harder than the last. Mer moves away from him, her sobs engulfing the air and I bite the skin on my shaky lips when I look at his wide, dead, green eyes. My heart shatters and I let out a breathless sound. My blood-stained hands go to his chest at the same time my tears find his face.

“I’m so sorry,” I choke out, my voice hollow as I squeeze his chest. “I didn’t mean it!” I scream lowly as I push my forehead into the crook of his neck. “I lost control Carter. I’m so sorry.”

I cry into Carter. Just continuously sobbing and unburdening myself against him, my pain all but forgotten. I cry until I feel like my eyes are bleeding, just like my heart. I didn’t mean to kill him, I couldn’t control myself when I did. I knew what I was doing but I just couldn’t stop Rae from doing it.

I don’t move from where I am until Mer tries to tug me off. I relent, not wanting to leave Carter. The only thing that takes me away is when Mahsa is called and sedates me, causing me to drift off into a painful sleep.

~*~*~

It’s been a week of pure hell. A week of being unable to sleep or eat. A week of being unable to close my eyes without seeing Carter’s dead body lying down beneath me and my hands stained with blood. It’s been a long week. A very long week indeed. My body has managed to heal, somehow all the pain is gone. At least physically….

Now, I’m standing in the middle of the bedroom I haven’t stepped foot outside of in a week and looking into the eyes of my husband, Matthew, who stares at me from the door. His eyes drink me in, the hairs on every inch of my skin standing up in response as his scent creates confusion in my belly.

He closes the door behind him, shutting Mer who was standing behind him away and then he walks carefully towards me. I hold my own hands as I take in his appearance. His black hair is shorter and there is a new tattoo on the left side of his neck. A small infinity symbol like the one on his pelvis but without the rose.

He stops before me and for some reason, his scent seems more intense as he hovers over me slightly. My legs begins to twitch.

“Lift up your hands,” He commands calmly, while I give him a questioning look, scrunching my face together in a lack of understanding. He repeats the same sentence again. “Raise your hands above your head, Mikayla.”

Reluctantly, I obey, not understanding why he’s asking me to do this but doing it regardless.

Matthew’s hands go to my sides and then I feel it on my jumper. His fingers tickle my skin as he takes my jumper off, pulling it over my head. Afterwich, he tosses it to the floor. I only look at him until I feel his hands on my stomach again. This time, on the waistband of my sweatpants. He undoes it and the minute he does, it wastes no time in hurriedly falling down my legs.