Hooligan | Dazai Osamu

Summer Rain

When does one know that they met their true love? Is that the deep connection, that two lovers feel between them, which tells them that they're meant for each other? Or do the sweet, tender kisses tell them this? No, it's tritely. There should be something deeper.

In your case, these were eyes.

His chocolate orbs with the golden dots in them, they were the ones, that told you that you were meant for the suicidal maniac, everyone called a fool. His eyes, that looked at you as if you were his whole universe were the ones, that made you feel special. Wether he was looking at you, while you two were having lunch and drinking coffee or when you weren't looking at him or when he stared in your eyes before you would close them and go to sleep - you could always see the great amount of the unbearable love, that he was holding for you. Those golden dots, you believed, were sparkling like a fire, started by his love and loyalty and this fire was keeping you warm better, than anything else.

Chaotic, mysterious, messy, destructive, impulsive - this was all about Dazai. He could come into anyone's life and turn it upside down with just his presence and then, he could leave without saying or leaving anything, but the feeling of incompleteness. He was a man, who saw lots of terrible things, that didn't make him a good, normal man. In the eyes of the society, he, perhaps, was considered as a bad person. He had dark past and suicide intentions, he was drawn to alcohol a lot before, he had different morals and opinions so in other words, he was something unknown.

But you always loved solving mysteries.

He was the thunder, while you were a simple, quiet summer rain, but perhaps, your quietness and calmness were the ones, that drew him to you. You met him by an accident, but it was the best accident ever. He simply went to you to ask you for a direction of the closest river, but then, one question led to another one, then to another and soon, suicide was canceled out of his schedule that day.

You were still wondering, how did a simple summer rain could turn a great thunder into a quiet breeze. Since when this hooligan became quiet and started singing about love more, than about chaos? When did he stop wanting to die and started wanting to live? None of you knew. He said, that he didn't even notice himself, when did he start looking forward for every new day to come because he would see you.

Happiness came to him slowly and gently like a small wave in the evening.

Sitting next to him and listening to his honey-like husky voice, while hugging him and feeling his warmth, was the best thing ever. This was your everyday tradition: each evening, you would sit on the couch and cuddle, while telling each other how your day went. You often ended up falling asleep on him in these moments because you were feeling too happy, too tired and too peaceful to resist the grip of sleep.

When did you even start to live together? You couldn't remember either. It happened so naturally and slowly so that none of you payed attention to it until it already started. Most of your clothes were already in his house, his bedsheets smelled like you, you could spend the whole week in his apartment - no wonder, you didn't notice. It just felt...right. Being with him just felt right and natural so living with him seemed like an inevitable thing, that would have happened no matter what.

Moreover, he himself felt right for you. Although, your parents used to say, that he wasn't a match for you, or his friends and coworkers at the same time were too shocked after finding out, that you were his official girlfriend, you two still knew, that you were connected with a red string of fate ever since the day you were born. You knew, that you weren't always drawn to all the mysteries, but just one, which was him, and this whole time, you were simply trying to find him by looking at the other ones. He also knew, that he was feeling incomplete not because there was something wrong with him or he had a mental illness, but because he was simply craving you without even knowing it.

You two, being the weirdest, yet sweetest couple alive, always knew, that a thunder was always the perfect match to the summer rain, despite all the differences.

So now, the answer to his question, consisting of 4 simple words, seemed to be the perfect, final dot in the first chapter of your tale:

"A million times yes!"

~~~

Don't forget to vote or comment and I hope, that you liked the first chapter of this book c:

Just as before, I'll be trying to update regularly and at least, once a week^^ I'll try to update more, but for now, it seems unlikely bc of school

Anyway, hope, you will enjoy this book!