Who Can You Trust?

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"What?"

"I'm addicted to sex Akoni, that's what that means"

"But how?"

"I don't know it's been this way since I was little. Well apparently I've always liked to hump since I was a baby. Then when I figured out what it did it was a wrap for me. Plus some other things that could have triggered it.

Then going to countless doctors and therapist they came up with me being one. Then again I wasn't allowed to fully tell them what was going on with her.So I live with the shit ain't no medicine so I'm just me. I guess that's why I never did the relationship shit. I didn't want nobody to feel I was a monster. Then I think about it they probably already think that since I make it clear it's just sex, it'll never be nothing else."

She sits there looking at me not saying nothing,I ain't going to lie it's making me nervous. This is why I don't fall for nobody. I don't get attached to anybody.

"So you want sex all the time?"

"Something like that, Im not no animal or nothing but it's on my mind most of the day. Its put me through allot of shit, I went through depression,self haterd just allot of shit. You tell people the shit they look at you differently. I don't need that, I don't need no judgement. I already do that enough for myself. It's like it takes me to another place thou. Something like weed, all my problems disspear for awhile. Maybe it's from being beat instead of being loved. Maybe it's from my mama selling me off to multiple women for drugs. Maybe it's from me killing my mama when she beat me bloody.I don't know what it truly is, I never got to the root of it. But it's apart of me,I love with it everyday of my life"

I look down at our hands again liking this feeling that not going to last when she says fuck me.

"So why me? Is it a thrill to try to get my virginity? Then what your going to leave?"

I look at her crazy ass. This girl just don't know

"Listen I've been with allot of females so let's just put that on the table. If you give me your virginity then I'll cherish it. I told you no other female had made me feel the shit I do with you. I'm not going to lie when I first met you I wanted to fuck the shit out of you. As soon as you opened that door. But then I got to know you, they say you know somebody when you love together. You've been through allot I know that. Just by the little bit you told me. You don't trust just like me. But we can help eachother with are problems we live through everyday"

"So something like a best friend"

"Uh yeah I guess you can say that"

"Oh well sorry I already have one of them even if I'm not taking to her trifling ass right now"

"Oh ok, it was stupid to think you know um just forget it"

She kisses me on my lips catching me by surprise, I turn side ways so I can deeping it she complys with no regrets. Sparks form when ever or where ever we touch. I'm addicted to this right here. This will be on my mind if I get a urge. She pulls away opening her eyes while smiling.

"Shut up nigga"

"So will you be my girl?"