Dongsaeng | J.J.K

[15]Its Just The Beginning

           

Song for this chapter
Love is not over

🎶
I always smile at you
Even the love is a tragedy for me
I always cry after it's over
Farewell Even though it's a comedy for you
Yes nothing is everlasting
I live without you even I feel like dying
Over, over, love is not over
Please take me out of this endless maze
🎶

EunHa's days were now made of sad songs and depressive lyrics. Her skin was dripping honey these days as she would sit like a dumb and numb in the garden or a park in the sparkling sunshine, clearly effecting her snowy pearly skin. Her eyes were losing their distinct light. Dark circles and heavy eye-bags under her eyes were holding a different story behind them but she wouldn't say anything as if she had sworn.

She was losing herself in her self-restrain, since the day she last met him.

She could never to her last breath would think about not to have him in her sight. The moment those cruel words came out of her mouth, her own heart shredded and cried with no voice. She believed, she would be damned to pull this brutal act.

But did she has another freaking option better than avoiding him?

Heaven's sake, he's younger. They had a clear 3 years gap and it was unbearable to even think of lov–
No, I can't. This L-word is a curse when it comes between them. It will ruin the honest relationship they had.

But,

Was it still the same anymore?

•••

"Jungkookie's graduating tomorrow. Ahh ! I'm literally on the cloud nine." JungMi and EunHa were walking towards their last class and JungMi looked happier than usual.
"Eunhiee , you're not looking well . Is everything fine?" She was noticing, EunHa was looking paler than usual these days and her visits to the bar were increasing weekly. All the time, She would tell her to not to drink this much . But she wouldn't listen to her anytime and give just a nod in response .

Though it's bad but still, it's sweet .

And that sweetness was helping her to diminish the bitterness she was filling her insides with. That bitterness was more venomous than the alcohol .

"I'm good . Don't worry. "

EunHa smiled , trying hard to satisfy her best friend, but JungMi could see how tired and fake her smile was . This wasn't even a smile, who knows better than her . After all she was picking EunHa once in a week from the bar, when she would get drunk to her eyes and call JungMi at the night .

But Jungkook never let EunHa know that he was the one carrying her to the car and driving all the way to her house.

•••

Jungkook was rearranging the books in his bedroom's tiny library that consist of 4 shelves with a box containing his journals. He still could recall his graduation day, when he was called on the stage to award a gold medal and a scholarship for his further studies. He was a proud valedictorian and the pride of his school. He would never have dreamt of scoring this well and getting admitted in a prestigious university of Seoul.

Tomorrow was going to be his first day as a degree student . He was excited much but between all those things , he still remembered EunHa's face–EunHa's pretty face and her Adorable expressions when she was struggling to see him but he was trying his best to hide . No wonder he got succeeded because he didn't want to let her know yet, what she was missing . Her eagerness to appear at the ceremony even when she told JungMi that she can't come. It was giving a meaning to the already flaring fire.

He was no longer dying in confusion that she, too had same feelings for him. Her feelings were making her miserable, which was something he was worried about.

Somewhere in his mind he was wondering, that how and when she began to like him?

•••

It's been 6 ungodly months of shit-shitty-shit days away from him. Well, EunHa herself wished for this !

Alright that's sounds so cruel. She was breaking herself into tiny little pieces that she wanted to be only get glued by him, the only one. But on the other side she still didn't want to see him. It will weak her already weaken heart. It would weak her decision, her self-control to just jump over him and embrace him in her arms to her last breath but...she couldn't.

It's something that was never in her hands.

She didn't want to admit that loving Jungkook was becoming terrifyingly hazardous.

Yeah, she loved him.

She was roaming absentmindedly towards some unknown destination while everyone was there in the welcome party for freshmen, having fun and everything. Fun wasn't something she needed at the moment. She wanted peace – peace, away from the continuous bombardment of his thoughts.

But do you really get peace when you want it so badly?

Nope!

Her eyes were on the several couples sitting under different human-size umbrellas, doing some typical couple-ish stuff when she felt a contact of some electric surface with the skin of her hand. She immediately pulled her hand away and took it in her other one, rubbing it. Was it really a charge she got when something similar to her own skin grazed her hand?

She turned around to see what or who it was when a sight caught her eyes, sending her insides into an ultimate shock and fumes of fire at the same time.

There was a boy scratch it– a very, very manly guy talking with a group of girls, flashing smiles time to time. Those girls were literally drooling over him and fiddling with their fingers in nervousness as if he was some celebrity. One of them was trying as hell to cling on his shoulder which he was shrugging in a most unnoticeable manner.

This guy wasn't the one she knew since long. His bunny face was there, but still not there. His white oversized shirt was hugging his body in so little places but revealing so much with sun rays showering upon him.

Damn.

This guy was taking her breath away.

Her mind was in a consistent battle of thoughts, pestering her eyes on him. This guy possessing a hypnotizing aura, standing with an undeniable perfection, was it really him?