All Out War

Chapter 22

Daryl hadn't said a word throughout the entire conversation. I went over and looked at him. He rocked Judith in his arms.

"What are your thoughts about all this?" I asked him.

He looked at me then continued rocking Judith. He patted her back gently.

"Carl, will you take Judith please? Daryl and I need a moment alone," I said.

Carl stood up and reached for Judith. Daryl looked at me then handed her over to him. I grabbed his hand and led him to the far end of the tunnel where Rick and I had talked minutes ago. Rubble fell as the bombs continued to go off. I sat down and he did the same. I looked over at him.

"Talk to me," I said.

"What do you want me to say?" he asked.

"Tell me what you're thinking," I said.

He went silent again.

"Daryl..." I said.

"Everything that we've gotten, we've gotten from fighting. I ain't about to stop," he said in a harsh whisper.

"Carl's right. We can't kill them all," I said.

"I thought we were on the same page. About killing them all," he retorted.

"I am. But that could only get us so far, Daryl. We can't kill them all without the possibility of either of us getting hurt. I'm not willing to risk the life of anyone else here. I can't lose any more family, babe. What if something happened to me?" I said.

"Don't," he retorted.

"No. If we keep going down this path, then something could happen. I could die, I could lose the baby, there are so many things that can go wrong," I said.

"You know I don't like you talking like that," he said.

"I know but that doesn't make it any less true. I'm following you in whatever you decide. You want revenge. I get it. Believe me I do but you can't be thinking about yourself with this one. Think of our baby, Daryl. What are we gonna show them? Our future for us and for them is what we have to constantly be thinking about. I want a future where the both of us are happy more than anything. That's all I want. What is it that you want?" I said.

He leaned in a pressed his head against mine.

"I want you," he whispered.

I placed my hands on his cheeks.

"I'm not saying that we stop fighting cold turkey. You're right, everything we've gotten, we've fought for. We won't stop fighting. I could never stop. It's in my blood just like it's in yours," I said.

I pulled away to look at him.

"But we have to know when it's the time to put an end to it. When it's time for us to start working for peace. That's what Carl is saying," I finished.

He grabbed my hand and kissed the back of it.

"I can't let anything happen to you. If you...if you died..." he started.

I placed my finger against his lips.

"Shh. We've already had that conversation. We don't need to revisit it," I said.

He leaned in and kissed me deeply.

"I'll try," he said once we parted.

"That's enough for me," I said pulling him in and embracing him tightly.

There was suddenly a crack that sounded above us and some debris came falling down. Daryl quickly hovered over me and shielded me from it. I started coughing. Rick, Carl and Michonne hurried over to us.

"Are you guys okay?" Rick asked.

I cleared my throat.

"Yeah. Daryl, are you okay?" I asked looking over at him.

He coughed a few times as well.

"Yeah. Yeah. All good," he said.

We stood up and looked above us.

"If it was any closer, it would have caved," I said.

Michonne looked over at Dwight and made her way to him.

"How much longer do we have to wait?" she asked.

We all made our way over to them.

"It should be letting up soon. Just a little while longer," he said.

"Here. Have a little something since we're gonna be here for a while," Tobin said passing the bags that he had grabbed.

We all sat down together and shared some snacks. I made sure Judith and Carl got enough.

"You're eating for two now. You have to have your fair share," Carl leaned in and whispered.

"I'm just making sure you and Judith are getting enough," I said.

He handed me a can of applesauce.

"Yeah. I'll never get enough of these canned beans. This takes me back to us on the road," he said while he scarfed down his beans.

"Yeah, right. I didn't think we'd ever find a place," I said.

"But we did. A place with a lifetime of possibilities. Thanks for having my back earlier," he said.

"Are you kidding? I've always got your back, kid," I said reaching over and kissing him on the forehead.

I looked over at Dwight. He hadn't touched his food.

"Hey," I called.

He looked over at me.

"Eat. We don't need you passing out on us when we get out of here," I said.

He nodded then started eating.

"I thought you were willing to try," Carl whispered.

"I am. I would have killed the son of a bitch already but I haven't, have I? And so long as he doesn't screw up or put us at risk, it'll stay that way," I said downing some more applesauce.

"Fair enough," Carl said.

Daryl had been feeding Judith and was now trying to get her to fall asleep.

"You should eat something," I whispered.

"When she falls asleep," he whispered back.

I rubbed Judith on her back and she settled into Daryl's arms. I was happy that she had him. I stood up and went to look through the bag. There was another can of beans that I pulled out and opened. I went back and handed it to Daryl. He looked at me.

"Hey, if I didn't insist, you'd go hungry. Come on," I said.

He took the can and emptied half of it into his mouth.

"Thanks," he said with his mouth full.

I chuckled softly.

"No problem," I said.

I went and took my seat between him and Carl and rested my head on Daryl's shoulder. I wanted to see what was left, how much damage Negan and his puppets had done to our home. I was not giving up on the fact that we were gonna rebuild the place. But just knowing exactly what we were working with would help. My eyes closed and I eventually drifted to sleep.