Midnight || Phan {Complete}

Three

Phil woke up that morning, feeling perky after the last date with Dan, it wasn't super 'romantic', it was more deep, not in that way-- Phil thought, giggling. He opened his phone, to see if he had any texts from Dan complaining about how impossible it is to sleep.
He had none.
Phil wasn't sure to be excited or worried. Did Dan get a good nights sleep? Or-
No, he couldn't have. Phil shook his head. The thought wouldn't leave his mind.

Phil's corgi ran around his feet as his mum gave Phil his breakfast.
"How's Dan?" His mum asked, sitting down next to him. Phil's mum loved Dan and thought he was the perfect boy for her son.
"He's good?" Phil didn't even notice how he seemed to answer with a question
"Not so sure, are you?" His mum didn't even look up from her newspaper.
"He hasn't texted me, but I haven't texted him so its a mutual confusion" Phil laughed slightly, ever since he met Dan his vocabulary has somehow grown.
When he finished his cereal, Phil went to get ready for the day. He texted Dan

U okay? U didnt text me last night x

Phil didn't know what he was expecting, some sort of long paragraph about how sorry he is for not texting him (which Dan has sent before) or some sort of acknowledgment of the text, however, Dan didn't even read it.

He and Dan had been dating for almost 3 months before Phil said I love you. He would've said it sooner, but Dan was so cut off at first, and he didn't want to risk losing him. 

The night Phil said 'I love you' was memorable for many different reasons. One of which was that he found a box without a lid, filled with knives of different sizes, all speckled with blood. The one on the top had the most, and it seemed the freshest. He tried not to think about Dan running the blades along his soft skin, and prayed Dan wouldn't notice the tears in his eyes when he came back. He didn't notice. Phil hid the box, and wrote a note on it, while Dan was asleep.

What if he finally- Phil grabbed his hair as if he could just grab the thoughts and throw them out the window. He sent another text to Dan.

Bear?

Phil didn't want to tell Dan he knew, not yet. He wanted to help Dan, but he couldn't risk losing everything. Risk losing Dan.

--//--

When Phil got to school, he had sent Dan over 20 texts and tried calling him 10 times. It was unlike Dan to not respond to Phil, or show up at school. Just because he basically always lived alone, he still had an almost-perfect attendance. So Dan not being at school was a big deal to Phil. It wasn't really to anyone else, but it was fine because nobody really cared about either of them. 

'It means more care for us to give to each other'  Dan laughed at Phil's sudden awareness of how nobody ever noticed them.

Phil couldn't focus in class. All he could think about was Dan and the lack thereof. He thought about all the things he had wanted to tell Dan but didn't
And now you're too late. He's already- Phil mumbled 'no' under his breath, hoping nobody would hear him. He shot his hand up
"Yes, Philip?" His maths teacher sighed
"May I go to the bathroo-"
"Go." His maths teacher pointed to the door.
Phil ran, letting the tears begin to fall down his cheeks.
Dan's gone. Dan's gone. Dan's gone. Dan's gone. Dan's gone. Dan's gone.
His head kept chanting the same two words, Phil shook his head violently.

When he got to the bathroom, he ran into a stall, closed the lid, and began silently sobbing.
You weren't enough for Dan. You're the reason he's gone. You couldn't keep him alive. 
Phil tried to tell himself that he didn't know if Dan was dead or not.
In a hope that just maybe Dan had texted him, he opened his phone.
One word brought his entire life back.

Seen by 'Bear <3' at 11:45 am

Phil sobbed in relief. Dan saw his message. Dan is alive. He still has his bear. He still has his bear.
He typed out a message, hoping Dan would respond the moment he sent it.

Bear, please respond I'm worried. I love you more than anything in the world. 

The entire text was true. Phil doesn't think he could ever love anyone as much as he loved Dan. Not Winston, his corgi. Not even his mum.

Dan was Phils everything.

Phil hoped Dan felt the same.

--//--

Phil was walking to class when a girl slid in front of him, making him stop in his tracks.
"Mariah" Phil didn't even look up
"Where's your boyfriend" She spat, forcing his face to look at hers
Mariah was Phils ex-girlfriend. He regretted dating her. She was clingy and hated Dan with a passion. When Phil told Dan he was dating Mariah, he pulled back, and pretended to not care.
"I don't know, God Mariah why does it matter" Phil tried to push past her
"Oh, getting a little sad again, are we, Philip?" She mumbled, grabbing Phil by the collar of his shirt.
"Get off me" Phil replied, not wanting to be aggressive to Mariah
"You still cutting, then?" She smirked evilly.
"Fuck. Off" Phil pushed himself off Mariah.
"Don't let little Danny know~" She sang, as Phil charged the other way.