Who Are You? *COMPLETE*

Guilt

[😈]

Peridot POV.

I opened the door to my room and flopped on my bed, not caring to shut the door.

Why does everything have to be so complicated... i didn't even know what to do. What am i supposed to say? How am i supposed to act like i wasnt the one with lapis on the hill?

I groaned into my pillow, before turning and hugging my blanket.

I heard the familier sound of pumpkin entering my room. She whined a bit and I turned over, just as she jumped onto the bed.

"Hey girl..." I patted her head. She pulled back her ears and whimpered again, before nudging my side.

I couldn't help but smile a bit. I sat up, kissing her head. "I think I REALLY messed up this time, pumpkin."

She looked up with sad eyes, and layed her head on my lap.

Just as i was considering being lazy for the next 30... hours, my phone buzzed. I opened it and felt a little surprised.

"Lapis?"

He had sent me a text? Why?

"Hey man. How is your Saturday going? Hope you didn't get in trouble for hanging out with me :("

I looked down at pumpkin, and her ears perked up. I looked back at the phone and typed a response.

"Not too much trouble :). Though my mom was a little angry. And I haven't really done anything today. Have to walk pumpkin pretty soon."

I leaned back against the wall, and although I wanted to, I couldn't stop looking at the messege.

Was this some kind of cruel fate for Me? Being so close, yet oh so very far from Lapis? Or am I just an idiot sandwich who's a giant coward?

Maybe a mix of both.

My phone buzzed again and I glanced back at my phone.

"Wanna meet at the park? I'm kinda feeling down today. I could use some friend time."

I blinked, glancing down at pumpkin. She nudged my leg, and I sighed.

"Sure. How about in an hour? I need to get dress haha."

Oh how I torture myself.

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Lapis POV.

I leaned against a tree as i waited for peri. I was still debating if I should tell him about what happened at the hill...

Or if it was stupid. Was this whole thing stupid?

I heard a familier bark and turned to see P umpking practicly dragging Peri toward me. He barely maneged to keep up to the point he was tripping every few seconds.

I snorted as they got closer, stepping away from the tree and rubbing pumpkins back before turning to look at a winded peri.

"Sorry..." he huffed and breathed heavily. "It took longer because my mom made me do the dishes."

He finally straitened his stance and gave a small unsure smile. "You... said you had a bad day?"

I smiled back at him. "Yeah but it's better now. Can we walk a bit?"

He nodded, loosening pumpkins leash a bit to let her sniff about as we strolled.

"Winter isn't too far away, huh?" Peri said. Looking around at the leaves begginging to fall.

"Yeah. I love winter. The snow, the hot chocolate, staying inside and relaxing..." I was so looking forward to maybe having Peri over to play some video games or something. Maybe I could hunt down a board game, or we could make snow forts.

"Winter is pretty great. Though I haven't really done anything speical for winter in a long time." He seemed to fade a bit, but I chose not to ask.

I turned. "Well that's not gonna stand, Peri. We can hang out. I mean, it won't be speical, but it'll be fun!"

Peri stayed queit, but shook his head as if breaking himself from thought. "Maybe..." he said it almost at a whisper.

"You... okay?" I tried to smile, but Peri's mood shift seemed so sudden.

"Fine... s-sorry." He turned a bit red, continuing to look at the ground instead of me.

"Peri..." I grabbed the loose cloth of his hoodie sleeve, forcing him to stop. "Really, you seem off..."

He stayed silent.

That silence made my heart beat slower. It seemed so... cold. Honestly I was slightly scared.

"How would you know...?"

"Huh?" I barely heard the sentence, but I saw pumpkin pulling her ears back and nudging his leg.

"How would you know, lapis?" He looked up, his green eyes both dark, and bright. I'd honestly never seen such amazing eyes before.

"You barely know me. You don't know what I think. You don't know I'm hurting." I let go of his hoodie as he took a step back.

"And honestly... I can't do this. I don't..." he paused, before growling to himself.

"Stay away, lapis. I don't want to talk to you. This whole thing was a terrible idea..." he turned, pulling surprisingly gently at pumpkins leash before shoving his hands in his pockets and walking away.

What the hell just happened?

Why does this hurt?

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I made my way back home, confused, angry, and most of all... hurt.

Peri had gone from being concerned about me, to never wanting to talk to me again in less than... 3 minutes tops!

I was just gonna push myself to the bathroom to take a shower, but someone grabbed my collar.

"Hey Lapis! Dude where were you? I've been here for 2 hours now."

I turned to see jasper, smiling but with a mysterious look in his eyes.

"Oh... I was just-"

"Off with some mystery girl, yeah yeah yeah I know hot stuff. But I got news."

I blushed a bit as his assumption. Why did everyone thing I had... oh yeah. Jasper knew about the mystery drawer.

"Uh.. okay?"

"Celebration party dude. For winning. You missed out on it after game, but the guys are throwing one In your honor. Their girlfriends decided perscilla is a bitch and they don't care."

He patted my shoulders. "It's tonight. Can you come?"

I blinked at him, then looked down for a second.

If Peri wasnt my friend... fine.

"When, where, and will there be booze?" I looked up at him with a cocky smile.

He laughed. "Starts at ten, Aidens house, and OH YEAH."

great.

[Ha you thought this was gonna be a happy chappy DUFUC.

naw I gotta get some feels in 😀

1063 words.]