Positive Regard

Chapter Thirty-Four

Tony and Pepper's wedding was lovely. Big, but lovely. Bucky got worried that I would want a traditional wedding after seeing it, but technically I'd always wanted one, and seeing it just made me want it more, but I wasn't going to tell him that. But I knew there was no point in having one, since we had few friends and no family, so we weren't going to have one. Bucky didn't want one anymore anyways.
I moved out of Bucky's arm to hug Pepper. "You look absolutely gorgeous."
"Thank you! Thanks for coming." She hugged me back and then turned to hug Bucky.
"Absolutely stunning, sweetheart." Bucky agreed with his charming smile. "Congratulations."
"Thank you." She smiled, her cheeks flushing. Bucky made everybody blush.
I hugged Tony. He looked happier than I'd ever seen him. "Congratulations."
"Thanks, kid." He hugged me and kissed my cheek. He held out his hand to Bucky, and he shook it, but they didn't say anything.
We didn't stay long at the reception. Bucky was ready to leave almost before the wedding started, so we only stayed an hour at the reception.
"We're going shooting tomorrow." Bucky said as we left.
"We are?" I raised my eyebrows.
"Yes. I want you to know how to shoot when I leave."
"When are you leaving?"
"I don't know yet."
"I don't have a gun."
"I have guns, doll." He opened the car door for me.
"I'm not gonna be good at it."
"You'll learn." He smiled, looking amused.
I really thought he overestimated my abilities.
When we went shooting the next day, I proved myself right by hitting the target very, very few times.
Bucky had the audacity to look amused the whole time. "Well, doll, looks like we won't be skeet shooting any time soon."
I didn't know what that was, but I didn't want to say that so I just laughed like I thought it was funny. "Why don't you have to wear glasses?"
"I don't wear glasses."
"Why not? Always use protection."
"That's for sex, doll." He smiled. "I don't like stuff on my face. It freaks me out."
His answer made my heart hurt, but I didn't want him to know that, so I turned back to the targets.
"You'd do better if you weren't scared of the gun." He smiled.
"I'm not scared of inanimate objects."
"You're holding her--it. You're holding it--like you are."
"Did you call it her, Buchanan?"
"Shut up and shoot, babe."
"Just relax." He said after a minute.
"Use both eyes; don't close one."
"Don't pull the trigger, squeeze it."
"Maybe you should just stay with Steve when I go." He said eventually.
"Are you saying I'm bad at this?"
"No. I'm just saying you're... not good."
"No, I'm bad." I laughed.
"Practice makes perfect. Well, better, at least."
"You're perfect." I countered.
"I should hope so. I was an assassin after all." He laughed.
"I don't need to shoot. We have neighbors, you know."
"Who's gonna shoot someone for you? Johnny? He won't even kill a bug. Try again." He held the handgun out to me.
"I can just call Loki--"
"I don't like him. I don't trust him with anything, much less with your safety." He put the gun in my hands. "Go on, doll. Try again."
"I don't like failure. Besides, this is unnecessary."
"It'll make me feel better."
I tried again, and I actually hit the target this time. It was right on the edge of the silhouette, but it was on it.
"See, there you go." He smiled. "Feel better?"
"Yes! This is fun."
"I thought you'd say that."
I really did wonder what it was like to shoot a real person. Or to stab a real person. I'd ask Bucky, but it'd probably either trigger him or make him think I was weird, so I wouldn't ask. I really was curious, though.
"Jay'll kill a bug." I said as we got in the car. "Just for the record."
"I don't care. I don't want your safety dependent on a guy I barely know."
"I'm fine, Buchanan. Loki's always there literally within five minutes of me calling, usually less. We know him."
"What if you don't have five minutes? Then what? Besides, I think you and I view him very differently."
We went home, and I spent the next hour convincing him to go on a night hike with me.
"I have to go to SHIELD early tomorrow." He said.
"You're not going until eleven. Nice try."
"But I'm tired."
I widened my eyes. "Please, Bucky?"
"Damn it." He sighed. "Fine. Let's go."
By the time we got to the top of the mountain, it was completely dark. The path lead out into a clearing on the edge of a cliff. I pulled Bucky over to a rock and laid down, waiting for him to lay down with me. Eventually, he did.
"I've pushed people off of cliffs." He said as we laid there, looking up at the sky as wispy clouds pass over the stars. He went on to say the names of people. So much for romance.
"It wasn't you, darling." I said softly, propping myself up on my elbow to look at him.
"Stop. It doesn't matter. I did it. Rosie?"
"Yeah, love?"
"I knew you were back." He said quietly. "But I knew you'd be better without me so I stayed away."
"You've been lying to me?" I raised my eyebrows, sitting up.
"That's what you're mad about?" He raised his eyebrows too. Where I did it because I was angry, he did it because he didn't believe me.
"You asshole." I snapped. "Do you wanna get pushed off a damn cliff? What the hell?"
"I was trying to protect you."
"From what?" I should've cut his hair in his sleep or something. That would've pissed him off.
"From me. From people after me. I'm sorry." He grabbed my hands so I couldn't walk away.
"I'm so tired of you trying to protect me from everything, Bucky. I'm a grown ass woman and I can take care of myself."
"Baby, you won't even kill a spider."
"So? That's irrelevant."
"I'm not saying you can't take care of yourself, doll. But there are some things you can, and some things you can't."
"You?" I raised my eyebrows. "I can handle you."
"I'm vio--" He cut off and sighed before continuing in a normal volume. "I didn't say that so we could fight. I said it so I could be honest."
Too late, we were fighting. "Why'd you come back, then?"
He closed his eyes and put his elbow over them. "Because I can't say no to you. Happy?"
Somebody grabbed me from behind, slapping a hand over my mouth and pulling me away from Bucky. I tried to scream, but my mouth was covered so not much happened. I kicked and hit, but the man didn't let me go.
Bucky was standing up in a second. "Who are you?"
The man was holding me with both hands, so there must have been other people around, because someone threw something small and black at Bucky. He caught it and held up what looked like a mask. "What the hell is this? Let her go. If you don't get your hands off my girl I'll kill you."
"Sergeant Barnes." An accented voice said.
Even from a couple feet away, I could see Bucky's eyes widen and his posture change. "What the fucking hell is this?"
A man walked in between me and Bucky. I stopped struggling, partly because I assumed Bucky would get the situation under control, and party because I was hoping he'd loosen his grip on me.
"Sergeant James Barnes, Prisoner #56898." He didn't have an accent. He was holding a recorder or something. "Lovely night, isn't it?"
Bucky threw the mask at him. "Who the hell are you?"
"You don't know me. You don't need to know me. You'll just have to say yes sir and do what I say. You'll need the mask."
"Let the blonde go." He snapped.
"Your wife? No."
"She's defenseless. Let her go."
"She's quite lovely." The man turned to me. "Much more beautiful than the pictures." He took my hand to kiss it, but I punched him. It wasn't a very hard punch, because I couldn't move my arm (also because I was weak), but it was a punch. He slapped me, but it mostly hit the hand of the guy who was holding me still.
"Don't touch her!" Bucky snarled, starting towards him. "Get your hands off of her and get your stupid goon the hell off of her, or I swear to God I'll rip your throat out."
The man calmly pressed a button on his radio thing. "Longing." A voice said, and Bucky froze. "Rusted."
"Stop." Bucky said cooly. "Stop. Stop now. What do you want?"
"Seventeen."
"What do you want?"
"Daybreak."
"Stop--"Please."
I had no idea what was happening, but I knew it wasn't good, so I bit the hand of the guy holding me. He let out a noise and his grip loosened, so I kicked him and ran out of his reach.
The man with the radio thing turned and looked at me, giving the man who had been holding me a disapproving glance. "Really? You got bested by a defenseless woman? Somebody shoot him."
"Furnace."
A gunshot rang out through the trees. The man's blood and brain juice splattered on me, and he fell over. Bucky was yelling at me to leave, but there was brain juice on me and I was screaming.
"Nine."
"Get out of here!" Bucky was screaming. He grabbed the guy with the radio thing by the neck with his left arm. The man dropped the radio, and it shattered, but the voice continued.
"Benign."
"Rosemary." Bucky grabbed me with his right arm and shoved me towards the path. "Get the fucking hell out of here. Go home and call Steve. Now. Now." He was sounding and looking terrifying, but he looked and sounded terrified too. "Now, Rosemary. Fucking go! Loki! Loki!"
"Homecoming."
Loki came waltzing up as Bucky started rummaging through bushes and under rocks. "Ah, there's a fight and nobody invited me?"
"Get her out of here." Bucky said coldly, with underlying hysteria that scared the hell out of me. He grabbed the mask off the ground and grabbed a gun from his pocket, handing it to one of the men the guy with the radio had come with.
"I really think we should go." Loki said, grabbing my arm and pulling me. "Now."
"Freightcar."
Bucky threw the man away from him.
I didn't know what the hell happened, but the next thing I knew, Bucky swung at Loki. Someone shot at him, and he turned around and started attacking the men in black.
Loki grabbed me and ran. When we got to the bottom of the mountain, Loki shoved me in my car and got in on the other side. "Drive." He said calmly.
I started calling Steve.
"Drive!" Loki yelled.
It scared the shit out of me, so I backed out of the parking spot and started driving.
"Rosie, hey." Steve said when he answered.
"Something just happened and I need your help."
"What's up?"
I told him what happened.
"Shit. Go home, Rosie. Now. Go there and stay there until I come. I wouldn't've thought you'd've left."
"Loki made me."
"Really? Okay. Do me a favor call Tony. Tell him to meet me up there. I have to go."
I called Tony, and after I hung up I realized I was getting farther away from Bucky, so I slammed on the breaks.
"I'm not going home." I told Loki.
"Yes you are. If he wanted you to be there, he wouldn't have told you to leave. Honor that. I'll stay with you."
"I fucking hate when you're right." I snapped.
"Most people do."