Not what I expected ...

Ricebowl

"Girls you're going on in three!" my head snapped towards the quivering backstage curtains as I released a shaky breath. Tonight was our first show. New York City, just the name makes me tremble with fear. Thousands of people watching us, mostly Alessia but that doesn't mean that there can't be at least some people who see us. It's even more nerve wrecking knowing that is was just the four of us taking on the entire stage behind Alessia.

To anyone watching it would seem as if I was just an ordinary dancer, shaking out the nerves, warming up, but my mind was a mess. Suddenly just relaxing and being myself wasn't enough. Absorbing the energy around me was the last resort, all the chatter blurring in my mind, the colours blending as people sped by, the buzz and excitement were the only things staying solid.

With a faint call of 'one minute left' ringing in my ears I zoned out, thinking about my late night Facetime with Sean. He seemed off, blushing and avoiding eye contact for the weirdest of reasons. Though that wasn't what occupied my mind at the moment, it was just the small thing he told me seconds before hanging up.

'Don't be nervous, you'll do just fine'

'Sean, it's a huge stage with thousands of people watching. What if I fall over or forget the whole thing or-'

'Stop, Kaycee breathe. Listen to me, this is a one in a lifetime opportunity and I understand that messing up could cost a lot but I know you. You Kaycee Rice are strong and unique, you could take on any challenge and any failure only makes you want to get back up even more. You have to take this risk or else it will be too late.
Just know I'm always here to support you, I'll always be there for you.'

I couldn't help but think that his words sounded awfully familiar to those of Josh the night before, on the plane. Now that I really think about it Tahani's words really had something meaningful in them.

Flashback

"Never knew Josh could be so insightful" I mumbled, discretely pushing my phone into the front pocket of my hoodie.

Tahani's head whipped around from where she was searching the drinks cabinet, her words sounding doubtful "If you mean Josh Price then he really can't."

"Well T he may seem like a complete goof but he can be sympathetic and quite professional at times" My reasoning clearly didn't convince her since all she did was quirk one of her eyebrows up.

"Kaycee, we're talking about the guy who was humping a teddy bear in my musically, wearing swimming goggles in dance class and who's vocabulary mainly consists of the words 'GIT' and 'BRO'. The only thing professional about him in the 'official' part of his Instagram user." The popping of her soda was like a finale to her statement leaving no room for argument.

Josh is good friend to both Sean and I  but him and Tahani had grown even closer over the past couple of months so I guess it does sound strange if even she points that out in Josh's behavior.

In the haze of my thoughts I fiddle with the bottom of my mesh skirt when the thing I feared most occurs to me crystal clear. My jaw slacked and eyes wide, all I can do before Taylor dragged me on stage was mumble the few fateful words that struck my head like lightning.

"He called me Ricebowl..."

...End of the show...

It was crazy to see these huge crowds, to take in the scale from above and not within. What's even crazier is knowing that every person out there can have an impact on our lives much like we can on theirs. All of them can have their own opinions on us, whether they be good or bad, romantic or platonic, or they may just not give a damn about who we, the backup dancers, are.

The thing is that when dancing in front of these extraordinary masses we as dancers have to both take in all the possible outcomes of our performances and still stay true to ourselves. It really would be nice to know that the potential love of your life might just be staning there in the front row, yelling their lungs out for you but just thinking about you and how you see yourself is the thing you should focus on first and foremost.

Everybody is beautiful and perfect in their own unique way.

If you're thinking this is random then you are right, it is random but those are all the emotions that pulse through my body as my feel carry me across the stage in my solo to 'Scars to your beautiful'.

The tour organisers had seen my solo from Jojo's class and asked if I could recreate the 'captivating' moment live on stage.

Where the nerves would usually kick in was just pure emotion and me being too absorbed in the dance to fully acknowledge that unlike before, more attention was on me now than Alessia.

And then it was silence. For just a few brief seconds my heart tensed up in anticipation before sending an uproar of butterflies inside me as the crowd erupted into uncontrollable cheers.

The girls were called up on stage with me while Alessia did her speech of thanks to the audience. It was a brief moment of euphoria for the four of us, having come this far with the ost amazing people in the world was the best feeling ever. Having only known them for a few months it was as if we were born and raised together, and so I hugged them closer, wordlessly showing my endless appreciation to each of them.

"Can I please have a round of applause for my spectacular dancers! Tati, Tahani, Taylor and Kaycee!" I exchanged shocked glances with he girls, not expecting to have this kind of ovation just for us.

"Hey, do you hear that?" Tati whisper yelled as we bowed.

I strained my hearing while looking at her before I finally understood what she meant, my mouth easily forming an o. There among the crowd, right in front row we heard the voices of the four boys who we didn't expect to see for at least another mouth.

Taylor started laughing uncontrollably at the sign her friend, Josh Beauchamp was holding. It was her name with fairy lights and Canadian flags all around.

Tahani was too grinning toothily at Josh Price who along with Gabe was throwing flowers at the stage. It's safe to say that Tati was in tears at the mere sight of her boyfriend, trying to cover her face with one of his roses that reached the stage.

I just stood there with my hands covering my mouth, a smile plastered on it. No flowers or banners were needed for me, I had no clue why but just seeing Sean be there for me just like he promised was enough to make me teary eyed.

We waved our last goodbyes too New York when I felt a hand clasp around my wrist.

"Come on, they're waiting!" Tati yelled in ecstasy.

________________________________________________________

What's up guys? It's ya girl Sean Lew back at it again!

I'm sorry for the time delay but I couldn't post my chapter in the morning because I got my phone taken away....good times, right?

New chap will be up tomorrow

This story is coming to an end

That's it, bye!

XOXO