I Had To Know Her

Chapter 30

Elena's POV:

Do you ever wake up somedays and just not want to take on the day? That's the kind of morning I'm having. I went to sleep last night, not feeling like myself. I felt like hurting myself. I've never felt that way in my entire life. 

I don't know why I'm feeling this way in the first place. Life has been going smooth lately. Stefan is no longer a vampire, I'm doing good in school, Jenna is doing a more than great job taking care of me, Jeremy is healthly and not into trouble, I have the best friends in the entire world. So what is it with me? Why am I feeling like this?

I get out of my comfy bed, where I honestly just want to be all day long, and go over to the bathroom that is connected to my room. I open up the cabinet and take out the bottle of the pills that are sitting on the top shelf, open the cap and pop one into my mouth. 

Depression pills.

They were given to me after the car accident, but I never started using them until lately, when things started to get bad again.

Things used to be really bad right after the accident. I wanted to die, along with my parents. I didn't want to see a world without them. I thought I was going to be put into a foster home, until Jenna came along and basically saved my life. I thought that life was never going to be the same again. Life started to get back into the groove after a while, but it will never be 'normal' again. I'll never see the people who raised me again. Me & my brother will never have the bond we used to share again.

I started to get a little better, and I had very supporting friends that were by my side the entire journey. And then Stefan came into my life. He made me forget about all my troubles, like they weren't even there in the first place. I just wanted to around him all the time, and to just... forget.

But ever since he killed someone, and then went looking for the cure, he hasn't been around as much as he used to be and I find myself digging a deep hole, of my feelings, that I'm never going to get myself out of.

I'm still holding the bottles of pills in my hand, and my hands are shaky, from my anxiety. I watch the movement in my hands as the bottle falls out of my hands and hits the ground, and the pills go everywhere.

''Shit.'' I said to myself.

I lean down to pick up the pills, but instead of putting them back into the bottle, I put them into my mouth, even thought I'm only supposed to take one a day.

I find myself putting another into my mouth, and then another, and another.

Sooner or later, I'm pretty sure I've had about 7-8 pills. I know it was a mistake, and I know this a form of hurting myself, but I just blanked. I didn't want to put them back into the bottle after they all spilled, I wanted them to be gone. I didn't want to take them anymore. I'm not some depressed girl. I just needed to get rid of them, so what better way then to just put them all into my mouth and let them digest into my stomach... and then, gone forever.

I leaned against my cabinet, and I heard the found of drips of water coming from my sink, right above my head.

Drip. Drip. Drip.

I just listened in on the water falling, and I felt myself started to fall too. I felt myself getting dizzy, and I had this weird feeling in my stomach like I was going to throw up at any moment.

I leaned over and I did end up throwing up, but none of the pills I took moments ago came out. They were still digesting in my small body.

I blanked out for a moment, and then it happened again. I kept blinking and then I kept blacking out. This happened for several moments, until I realized this was the exact feeling I had before I passed out underwater, when my parents car flew into the Mystic Falls River.

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Stefan's POV:

Elena didn't come to school today. I looked for in first period, where she sits in the front of the classroom, and her long brown hair flows to the back of her chair. I catch her glances at me, but today, I didn't catch a glance or see her locks.

I texted her this morning asking if she wanted a ride to school, and no response there either.

I didn't know what was up with her. She's not someone to not respond to me, or miss school without telling someone.

I decided to hop in my car and take a ride over to her house, and see what she was up too.

I pulled into her driveway, and to my suprise, the front door was wide open, and there was wet footprints leading up the doorway, and right in front of my car, was an ambulence.

I didn't know what to think. Was Elena hurt? Was Jenna hurt? Jeremy? I didn't know which one it was and a million and one questions were flowing in my head. I stopped thinking about everything that could of happened, and jumped out of my car, retracing the wet footprints, and running upstairs.

I walked into Elena's room, and my eyes grew big, my mouth dropped and I became speechless when I saw my girlfriend laid out on her bathroom floor, looking life-less.

''Elena...'' I screamed.

''Stefan, oh my god, thank god you are here!'' I heard someone say as they came closer to me to embrace me in a hug. It was Jenna.

''Jen-Jenna what happened? Is she okay? Is she going to be okay?'' I was panicking.

''Calm down, boy. She's going to be just fine. She just had a little accident. They're finishing up checking her pulse and heartbeat and all that stuff before they transport her to the hospital.'' 

''Accident? What kind of accident?'' I demanded to know. I looked over to the bathroom floor again and noticed Jeremy right by her side, running his fingers up and down her arm. I wanted to be next to her, I needed to be. I needed to be comforting her.

''It looks like she overdosed this morning. I was at work and Jeremy went off to school so we came home and found her like this. Elena isn't someone to want to hurt herself, or even attempt to kill herself, has she been acting weird or skeptical to you lately?'' She said.

Overdosing? Elena overdosing? No no no. My girlfriend would never do something like that.

''No... No, she wouldn't of done something like that.'' I said, before pushing Jenna to the side. I can figure out the rest of the details later, but right here, right now, I need to be next to her. Everything is going to be okay.

-

They ended up transporting her to the Mystic Falls local hospital.

She's been here for hours now, and they have been non-stop running tests on her, and putting needles in her arm, IV's, blood tests and so much more shit I can't even begin to name it all.

Elena is going to be okay. It looks like she took too many anti-depressents. I didn't even know she was taking any of those. She always seem happy to me, like she didn't need to take those in the first place.

It must of been something about her past, about her parents. I talked to Jeremy when we were sitting in the waiting room, and he said that she used to take some pills after the accident cause she was really bad with emotions, pain and more. I didn't even know any of this, she didn't bother to tell me. 

It didn't matter now, because her health was the most important thing at the moment.

I sat in a chair, next to her bedside, holding her hand.

Jenna left with Jeremy to go home for a while, they've been here all day keeping me company and checking up on Elena. I told them I would stay with her, and I didn't plan on leaving anytime soon so they had all the time in the world.

I squeezed her hand with so much force, and I wish she could feel it. She was so numb from all the stuff they put her on, so there would no way she would even feel it if she were awake.

The doctors said she should be waking up in a few hours, but for now, we just have to wait around and hope for the best.