The Wheel

17. David

My heart began to beat faster. No, no, no! Shit! Okay, calm down. Don't show your concern or else they'll figure it out. I should tell them about something else.

"Interesting," Ayama declared darkly, "let me show you something."

A demonstration of series of clips from YouTube with people awkwardly singing, falling and dancing started paying on the wall in front of me.

"How does it feel when someone record you at the most awkward moment and then post the video in the Internet? Maybe the audience has fun, but how does it feel to be the one who had been recorded on camera? You should be familiar with that feeling, Mr. Prone," Ayama said suggestively.

They know everything about me! What if Ayama bluffs? Breathe deeply, David and pretend that it's okay. Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out. Follow Emma's advice. Suddenly I felt fear building up in my solar plexus since my chair had done a one hundred degree turn – I can see my bewildered group mates. At that moment I blushed and regretted sitting at the table with the wheel first. Maybe I shouldn't have done it? But who would go in that case? And what would have happened?

"So, David Prone," a female computer voice said to me again, "tell us about your biggest shame."

I squeeze my eyes shut and remember my feelings when I was going through that terrible moment. Everybody saw me, everybody knew me! I don't want to! I don't want to! I try to take a deep breathe again, but I do it too loudly. Questions about how the hell we got here and what is going on keep popping up in my mind.

"We know how you feel, Mr. Prone."

"Oh yeah?!" I objected. "Then why do you make me talk about my biggest shame? Why? What do you need that for? Tell me!"

"Too many questions, Mr. Prone," said Ayama calmly, "you'd better tell us what you have to as soon as possible."

"You know there's not much pleasure in that!" I continued screaming. "It's horrible!"

"Alas, Mr. Prone, you got a sector with a 'Shame', so you have to tell us about your biggest shame. There's no other way. Okay, let's not waste our time."

My group mates kept watching me quietly. I felt like an actor, taking part in a play, and the guys were the spectators.

"I'm not telling you anything!" I shouted.

Wow, it's getting interesting," that bitch Kate was laughing.

"Shut up, will you?!" I told her harshly, because she made me even angrier. Damn it! If she were in my place, she'd know how I feel.

"Hey," Chris said discontentedly, "don't be rude to her."

"Chris!" I said to him. "She'll be laughing at you, why are defending her now?"

"We don't have much time," said Ayama. "Come on, Mr. Prone, I give you ten seconds. Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock."

Ten emojis appeared on the screen: this time they were simple smiley faces.

"I got it! I got it!"

"Ten, nine, eight, seven, six..." Ayama counted down, as the number of the smileys was getting lower.

Oh, no, again!

"Alright, alright," I said quickly, "last year before entering the university my friends and I went to a bar and a slightly overweight girl was hitting on me. Everybody in the bar was looking at me and laughing."

"Oh, liar, liar, pants on fire, Mr. Prone! Lying is bad! I'm going to have to punish you!"

"What are you going to do?!"

Suddenly one of the screens on the ceiling came apart and a pair of headphones was lowered down and... Aaah! Stop it! Stop it!!!

"Stop it! Stop it!!!" I was begging.

That horrible sound stopped and the headphones were lifted up. It was awful. I have never heard that sound before. What was it? It felt like a hundred of drills were inserted in my head and turned on all at the same time.

"Now tell us about the biggest shame in your life."

God, what the hell is going on? I'm sitting in this freaking room and have to talk about my biggest shame!

I take a deep breath and close my eyes, so that I wouldn't see the faces of my group mates.

"Three years ago..." I began talking.

"Oh, Mr. Prone, you have to open your eyes!"

"Are you kidding me?!" my eyes were filled with tears. "What do you think you're playing at?!"

God, it's so embarrassing! They have never seen me cry before! I'm not five years old to behave like this!

"Look at your group mates, while talking."

I take a deep breath. God, help me!

"Three years ago," I started talking not without difficulty, "I took part in swimming competition..."

"Your swim trunks slip down?" Kate asked, smiling.

Shut up, bitch!

"Please, Kate," I said quietly. "I feel terrible! Can't you see, it?!"

Why doesn't this stupid Chris settle her down?

"Kate, stop it, it's not a game!" Veronica asked her.

At least somebody did it, thanks for that! Okay, one more deep breath. You can do it. Don't close your eyes, just talk.

"I took part in a competition. I liked swimming a lot. I went to a swimming pool at school every two days. I went to a school competition – there were so many people. Two hundred twenty-seven people. Two hundred twenty-seven! The competition started, I was going the first one, I was supposed to win that thing. My family, my class mates, my teachers were there!!!" I tried to talk about that shame as slowly as possible. "Everybody was recording it! Can you imagine?"

One more deep breath.

"It's okay, David," said Emma that found it in her to support me, "It's not a big deal."

Her words were like a breath of fresh air for me. At least someone won't laugh.

"I was almost at the finish line, I almost won," I continued. "God, I shouldn't have gone to that café! I shouldn't have!"

"Oh, I guess, I got it," Kate said indifferently.

"Well," I was about to finish, "a couple of meters before the finish line I had...a sudden...diarrhea...in front of everyone...Everyone!"

I want to stop crying! I hear Kate laughing, Chris laughing, Mike laughing. God, kill me, I feel so awful! They know now. You're gonna be ashamed for the rest of your life, David!!!

I heard someone behind me started playing a video. Is it the sound of the water splash? What?! No! No! Not that! Please, not that! Why???

"Yes," Ayma agreed, "Three years ago David Prone took part in a swimming competition. And, obviously, a not very fresh burrito revealed itself in the most inopportune moment."

Everybody was watching the video somebody had taken. They can see everything! It's a dream... it's a freaking dream! I try to get out of the chair, but since I'm tied up it's pointless. I unconsciously start to hit everything I can reach with my fists. I want to tear up my clothes! I want to bite myself!

The video finally ended, Thank God! Let me go!

"You are free, Mr. Prone," Ayama said long-awaited words.

The mechanism released my hands. I immediately stood up and ran towards the corner, to hide myself from everyone who was around me. I feel so bad! I can't believe they know now!!! My body is shaking and I can't stop thinking about Kate's, Mike's and Chris' laughter while watching the video. Why were they laughing at me?! We were watching a stupid video from YouTube in the beginning and everybody was silent! Why were they laughing?! I've always felt that they hated me! Almost having got to the corner, I felt something vibrating in my pocket.