The Wheel

29. Michael

"What an 'unexpected' turn of events," I said sarcastically, leaning back on the chair.

"Can you remember the seven deadly sins, Mr. High?" asked Ayama, ignoring my comment.

"Lust, gluttony, sloth, greed, envy, pride...wrath."

"Excellent, Mr. High," she said, pleased, "if you think about it, we commit those sins in the course of life one way or another: when we are young our hormones get the best of us, so having sex with unfamiliar people every now and then becomes something ordinary for us. Of course, not everyone lives like this, but it's quite common. It's lust. Gluttony in the age of fast food? Is it surprising? But I admit that you, Mr. High, eat healthy food."

While she was talking I was looking at the wall and saw different photos, pictures and GIFs from social networks, connected to sins.

"Sloth. Oh my God, he didn't text me back, he doesn't wanna talk to me," said Ayama, overreacting. "I don't know what to do, so I'll just go to the club and hang out there for a while. Oh, there are so many things to do, I can watch a couple of episodes of 'Mr. Robot'. Greed. What wouldn't we do to make people believe we allegedly live in luxury? Endless loans from banks only to boast of our new purchase that was allegedly bought with our own money. Then again, Mr. High, your parents are quite familiar with that, aren't they? And chasing success? I'm sure you know the feeling when you want to be richer and cooler than the people you studied or worked with or, for example, than those you hold a grudge against. All of your class mates and group mates become your rivals in the race for fame and fortune. Do you go to class reunions to have fun? No, you go there to see who has more money and to give an opportunity to your ego to rejoice if you're the wealthiest one! And when it comes to genuine happiness, well, nobody cares about that..."

It was hard for me to hear her words about my parents – I wanted to hit the table once again!

"Envy," she continued. "What a beautiful life he has in comparison to mine. Oh, he has the best MacBook and I've got nothing! Damn, what a great body she has and I've spent years trying to lose some weight. That jerk's salary is two times higher than mine, yet I work way harder! It's unfair! Pride. Frankly speaking, it's my favorite sin. Look at me! Over here! Look at my family! Look at my body! Wanna 'like' it? Look at my works! Look at my money! Look what a happy person I'm! Why don't you 'like' anything? Take a look once more! Look at my 'perfect' life! And 'like' me again!"

When Ayama pronounced the last phrase pictures of me and my group mates appeared on the wall: my photos from the ring, photos of Kate from the party, photos of Chris and his mother with his newborn brother, photos of Veronica travelling, selfies of Emma, David, Miguel where all of them smile happily. I don't see Sam's photos; he doesn't like social networks.

"Only a sham and a lie," said Ayama. "You are not just easily hiding our problems you are looking for easy ways to deal with them."

There were cuts and pieces from silly commercials and movies about self-development and achieving the goals. I managed to hear some phrases like: "We'll tell you a secret that will turn your world upside down!", "It only takes five minutes on this innovative fitness equipment and your body will become slim! Order now with a discount!", "Become the creator of your reality in twelve days with secret quantum practices from Himalayan yogis!", "You'll be able to live the life of your dreams with the help of the law of attraction!", "Do you want to have a fancy car, a big house and run your own business that works automatically? Enroll now!"

"It's surprising how people keep trying to find this 'magic pill' that will change their life," she commented the cuts from different films and trainings. "People don't even think about what they really want from this life, nevertheless they're positive that a lot of money and a big house will definitely make them happy. How do we call that? An American dream that was put in our head in the childhood?"

Ayama made a short pause to give us time to think about what she said.

"Well, we got carried away a little," she said. "What do we have left? Wrath."

There were recording of my fights in the ring where I win easily.

"Don't you think, Mr. High, that you look like an animal on those videos? Is that the reason they call you 'Varan' in your fight club? Of course, first you were called 'Mantis' because everyone thought you had sadistic tendencies and after every fight you were ready to eat your opponent alive, but a mantis is very thin so that insect hardly can be associated with you, but Varan suits you because that animal can kill those who several times bigger than it due to its venomous saliva. No, you don't spit in the ring, but can beat anyone...almost."

"Almost..." I repeated the last word angrily.

"But there is one opponent who is still unbeatable for you, am I right?" she asked obtrusively.

"Should I start talking?" I asked.

As I expected my chair turned to my group mates. Kate was showing her genuine disregard, and I saw it in Emma's face that she was the most worried one.

"Ah, you love stories," I emphasized, "of course, it's not enough to say that my biggest sin is wrath. You need a story!"

"I'm sure everyone in this room knows about you biggest sin," Ayama started to explain, "but have you ever thought why it is essential part of you?"

The guys pursed their lips and lowered their heads because of the awkward situation; everyone except for Kate.

"Okay, I'll start. Well, I have a little brother Jasper. He's..."

"Wait, wait," she suddenly interrupted me.

What? Did I say something wrong?