omegle • joshler

am i suffocating you yet?

josh looks himself over in the mirror one last time. he wears a long, white death cab for cutie muscle shirt and black skinny jeans and a black snapback over his purple curls. he thinks he looks okay. nodding to himself as an approval, he walks downstairs.

tyler on the other hand, looks at himself in the mirror for the billionth time today. he wears a black, oversized sweatshirt and black skinny jeans. he slides his red backpack onto his shoulders and sighs deeply at himself. what if josh thinks he's ugly in person? or what if he isn't skinny enough? what if he doesn't even show up? millions of questions race through tyler's mind.

"YOU'RE MAKING A MISTAKE. HE WON'T BE THERE ANYWAYS."

tyler ignores the angry voice and messes with his fluffy, brown hair, trying to tame it down. he groans out of frustration over his tired, bloodshot eyes from staying up all night due to blurryface. but not today. tyler is going to forget about blurry's existence and finally meet his best friend.

"YOU KNOW HE'S JUST GOING TO HURT YOU. THEY ALWAYS DO."

"n-not today, blurry." tyler smiles, walking past him to head downstairs.

blurryface appears in front of him, but tyler walks around him once again.

"STOP." he says angerly.

tyler opens the fridge, nervously. he doesn't usually like to eat, but josh might notice if he doesn't. he frowns as he glances around at the leftover pizza boxes and the unfinished beer cans spilling down the shelves. there's nothing edible in here, and the milk is outdated. but cereal without milk is always good, too.

he grabs a bowl and dumps the stale cheerios inside, ignoring blurry's dark painted hands wrapped furiously around the table next to him.

"YOU WILL REGRET THIS."

"shut up."

"ONCE HE SEES HOW DAMAGED AND BROKEN YOU REALLY ARE, YOU WON'T STAND A CHANCE."

"shut up!"

"AM I SUFFOCATING YOU YET?"

"leave me alone!" tyler now screams, throwing the bowl at his dark passenger. it flies right through him and he disappears, the bowl slamming into the wall and shattering into pieces.

his mom races into the kitchen, half ready for work, glaring at her son with her mouth wide open.

"what the hell is wrong with you? clean that up!"

tyler's eyes almost spill over with tears as he looks to blurryface, now standing right next to him, frustrated that his mom couldn't even see him. he whimpers, now unable to speak completely.

she scoffs. "you are absolutely crazy."

tyler now allows the tears to drain from his eyes as he races past her and out the door, ignoring the fact that he hasn't eaten in a couple days. who needs food anyways?

"SKIPPING MEALS WON'T MAKE JOSH LOVE YOU, BUT IT'S WORTH A TRY."

...

josh drives down to the bridge, the place where he used to go all the time when he was going through what he was going through. he's glad that part of his life is pretty much over, because that bridge is a long drop onto big rocks and deep water. hopefully that's not the reason why tyler goes there so often.

he parks on the side of the road away from where the people were, and walking steadily towards where they would meet. maybe tyler doesn't want to see him after all and he should just turn around and go home. no, he can't think like that. he trusts that tyler wants this as much as he does.

walking a little closer, josh's eyes soften and his lips turn upright into a smile. he notices a small, fragile boy sitting on the edge of the railing in all black, a red backpack on his shoulders, and a ukulele in his hands. it's tyler, you couldn't miss him if you tried. he actually showed up.

tyler stares down at the waves, crashing onto the shoreline along with all the pointy, scary rocks. maybe if josh doesn't show up, he should see how far down the water really is.

"JUMP."

the words echoes around tyler's head, his legs now dangling. he strums the ukulele louder, hoping to block out the voice. it's almot twelve and josh hasn't shown yet. he'll give it a few more minutes.

"tyler?" josh's voice calls out, quietly. tyler almost flinches at the sudden noise and turns around carefully, unable to believe that josh was standing right there behind him. he's real, he's truly real. and he actually showed up to see him.

"oh my gosh." he whispers so quietly that he barely heard it himself.

"i see you brought your friend." josh smiles, glancing at the instrument. tyler can't stop the smile spreading across his face. he swings his legs around and stands in front of josh, not breaking eye contact.

josh blinks slowly before opening his arms, somewhat worried that touching tyler in the slightest bit would break his fragile frame. "come here."

tyler walks nervously towards the other boy, falling into his arms. josh wraps them around the boy's almost too skinny frame, tyler tensing up but immediately sinking into josh's arms. it feels right. he feels right.

after a few minutes of hugging and weird glances from people walking by, they let go. josh smiles sadly, taking in all of tyler's features. his sad eyes and tear stained cheeks, and the fact that he looks like he has never eaten before. as warm and friendly as josh's eyes seem, tyler notices how they look almost as if they're holding back a lot. not just tears, but a lot of emotions he's afraid to show and words he can't say. maybe josh is just as screwed up as tyler.

"hey." josh finally speaks.

"h-hi."