book 1 ✔︎
book 2 ✔︎
book 3 ✔︎
PART OF ME - you become so emotionally close to someone that you feel like they are literally a part of you, like a half of your heart. You don't want to live without them - you can't.
Aviana Ember wouldn't know this fe...
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41 | already gone
I want you to know, you couldn't have loved me better
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We spend Axel's last night hanging out with friends at his place, which we managed to fix up because he refused to move in with us. I don't know everyone that's here, except for the usual crew and Axel's friend, Clay, the drug dealer.
Axel makes his rounds, talking to people, them wishing him luck in Seattle, and although I'm occupied with Tasha and Helen, I can't stop watching him, wishing he'd only pay attention to me. To come here and hold me. And then not let go when it's time to leave.
To my surprise, Clay sits down in front of me and notices me watching Axel. He puts out his dart and waves my boyfriend over, telling him, "sit, we have gifts for you."
Axel sucks air in through his teeth and plops down beside me, taking me into an arm while he drinks a beer. "I don't think I want your gifts, man," Axel tells him, "I won't be able to cross the border with them."
Clay chuckles, "it's not drugs." He pulls out a unicorn gift bag that he must have hid under the couch earlier and smiles, "go ahead, open it."
Axel sets down his beer and takes the bag cautiously. The others have formed a group around his small living room as he opens the bag, and as I'm trying to peer in, he pulls it away, squinting at me playfully. I hold my hands up, laughing, and back off as he glances into the bag.
He grunts, and drops the bag onto his lap, closing it up while he sighs.
Clay bursts out laughing.
Axel's head falls into one of his hands and he rubs his eyes. "You're fucking gross."
Clay laughs harder as we all wonder what's inside, and he somehow manages to say, "you're gonna need it man. Avi's not coming with you."
"It's not even in a package," Axel's voice cracks, and he crinkles his nose, "have you used it already?"
"It's clean," is all Clay replies with.
"Dude, what is it?" Will finally asks for everyone, leaning on the back of the couch behind Clay.
Axel shakes his head, as if to say 'I can't believe I'm showing you', when he reaches into the bag to pull out a Masterbater.
Clay shrieks with laughter now. "A portable vagina!" he yells, and although everyone laughs, they shake their heads. This must be the usually Clay they know. It's so hard not to like him, but fuck, I'd love to whip a pillow at him right now. "Don't worry, Avi," he turns to me, "your man won't be too lonely now. But what about you? Where's Tasha?" he asks, and looks around frantically, only to find her already beside me, "did you get your friend a dildo?"
