✔︎ | Part of Me (Trilogy)

37 | i think i can handle prison

Hi! I just wanted to let you guys know that I published a new (rewritten) story called 'A Deal With The Devil'! I hope you'll consider checking it out...it's genre is mystery-thriller + romance and I'm super excited about writing it as I'm finishing up POM <3

Thanks for your support! Your friend,

- Adi

37 | i think i can handle prison

Today is Axel's hearing. He's unbearably calm as I freak out, shaking so hard from the nervousness that Will has to rest his arm around my shoulders to try to get me settle down. Axel's quiet though, so I know he's scared, but it's like he's already dealt with the fact that he might be going to jail, and he's ready to just serve his time and get out. 

We're waiting for my parents and Jem outside of the courthouse, Axel finally being able to stand with the help of crutches, although I have to admit that being in a wheelchair because of what Gary did to him would maybe have gotten him more sympathy. Either way, he committed aggravated assault, and even though it was towards a complete scumbag, it comes with consequences. 

There seems to be some tension between Axel and I as he stands across from me. He seems almost apologetic, like he somehow needs to apologize to me for defending me. Or maybe he can't imagine what it's going to be like living away from each other, because I sure as hell can't, even though we were separated for two years. I guess that time apart was enough for both of us. I don't want to go any second longer without him, and he doesn't seem to know what to do with me before he has to go away. 

I give him a small smile, rubbing my hands together to warm them up, even though mid-March in Seattle is warming up and sunny. 

Will glances down at me and finally murmurs something to fill the silence. "Avi," he says in a hushed voice as he nudges me, "don't do anything stupid."

I scowl, looking at my brother accusingly. 

He shrugs. "Just, if things don't go the way you want them to go, don't freak out, okay?"

"Don't freak out?" I say, doing just that already. "What would I do?" I demand. 

A smirk forms on Axel's face. "I don't know, beat up the judge?" he teases. "End up in prison longer than me?"

Will chuckles, and my nerves start to calm. 

"You shouldn't get any time," I tell Axel again, pointing. "It isn't fair." 

"It is fair," he replies, motioning for me to come closer with a hand resting on the top of his crutch. I step into him and slide an around around his waist, resting my head against his chest, breathing in his musky cologne. "I beat someone up, sweetheart. As much as I wanted to hit that son of a bitch, it didn't solve anything, because hitting people isn't the right way to deal with anything. I should know that much."

I sigh, leaning my head back to glance at his handsome face, freshly shaved, and he grins, pecking my lips. "I'll be fine," he whispers. "So will you! You're graduating, and getting your degree, and starting your job. You'll be so busy you'll hardy notice I'm gone."

I scoff at that. "I'll be thinking about you every second of every day, like usual. But," I sigh, reaching up to stroke his face, "I know you'll be okay."

He kisses me again and again and somewhere during that time Mom and Dad and Jemmy arrive, Jem screeching her brother's name the moment she sees him. She doesn't seem to realize that he's still healing because she intends to jump into his arms as per usual, but I scoop her up into mine before she can do that. 

She doesn't complain, but leans in to let Axel peck her cheeks, folding her arms around his neck as he nuzzles his face into her neck. 

I didn't think she should be here. Axel fought against it to. She shouldn't be in a courtroom where her brother is getting sentenced to jail. We thought we should have kept the situation quiet and took Jem back home, and she'd think that Axel was just really busy during the time he spent in jail. 

But of course she overheard things and demanded to be here. She knows too much for her own good, sometimes. But nevertheless, Axel seems to be glad to see her and she definitely relaxes me too. 

When Jamie comes we go inside of the courthouse and to the courtroom, Jem between Axel and I, holding our hands with support. 

・・・

Axel was sentenced to four months incarceration despite the abundance of mitigating factors. If Will hadn't told me not to freak out before the hearing, I probably would have stood up and screamed an objection at the judge and got Axel more time. Thank God I only did that in my head, but nevertheless, I wasn't pleased. 

I didn't think he'd get that long. Four months is a long time when you're used to spending every day with someone. In four months time, I will have had my 21st birthday, gotten my paramedic diploma, and started my job as a paramedic, all while Axel was locked up in jail because I didn't deal with my sexual harassment situation the way I should have. 

Almost like he knows I'm blaming myself, Axel encircles me in his arms and whispers, "Aviana, none of this is your fault. None of it."

I nod against his chest, tears clinging to my eyes. We're at the prison; luckily Axel got to come home before serving his sentence, and I got to be the one checking him in to start his four months. I nod again, hugging him tighter, crying a bit harder, but holding it back for the most part until I get back to the apartment where I can cry with Luci.

I know our baby boy is going to miss Axel too. He won't quite understand what's going on when Axel doesn't appear after a couple of days, but once he comes home after four months, Luci will be ecstatic, and Axel too. And we'll be one big happy family again. 

"I'll get visitation hours," Axel tells me. "You can come and see me and tell me all about what's going on with you, okay?" 

I hold onto him even tighter, shaking my head. "No, please don't go in there. I don't want you to go. I want you to come back home with me." 

The guards are ready to take Axel, but luckily enough for us, they don't rush us. They probably don't want to make a scene by pulling Axel away with me screaming after him. I can't deny that that could happen. 

Axel sniffles, chuckling a little, the familiar sound warming my unsettled stomach. I wipe my eyes to gaze at him, explaining, "I don't want anything bad to happen to you. Jail is scary."

He hugs me again, picking me up at the same time. "Baby, I'll be fine. I've dealt with a lot of shit in my day, I think I can handle four months of prison. Do you trust me?" 

I nod, and we hug a moment longer before he sets me back down and holds my face in his hands, pecking my lips softly and slowly once more. 

"I love you," I whisper. "Be safe." 

He rests his forehead against mine, whispering, "I love you too," back. 

And then I'm watching the guards lead him behind a set of doors and down a hallway until he's out of sight and away from me for what I'm sure will feel like eternity.