I mutter hopelessly to myself
As my throat begins to feel thick.
And I know it's so wrong,
but I just can't help
acting like this righteous dick.
My head hurts like a son of a bitch and
I hate how I get emotional like this.
But I just can't stop,
Just wanna stop feeling like this.
So I try and I try but nothing changes,
The world's always the same.
I wanna stop pretending
But I'm just a pawn in the game.
So I push it all back,
until nothings left and
I've lost everything I once knew.
And everyone's gone
but somehow nothing's changed.
In my mind, still got so much to lose.
Reality, it's you I refuse.
I don't like ever feeling like this
but there's never really a choice.
Sometimes I forget who I'm s'posed to be;
I never really had a voice.
Silence is my only friend
And as humans, we pretend,
Life is just an enormous test;
it's purpose to see who's really best.
But if I'm honest for this one time
With you and them and myself.
I know the best just isn't me;
Not me or anyone else.
I'm never gonna be a role model
And never gonna reach the bar.
I'll probably never find
my purpose in life,
And I know I'll never reach the stars.
But still I know that I will try
If only just in my useless mind.
And that is such a disturbing thing.
For hope is dangerous, if it clings.
Reality discomforts me,
shows me all that I could find.
All the ways, I could be sweet,
How if I just used my mind,
I could possibly be great.
Filled with love
Released from hate.
If I got up and worked for it,
But I just know I won't.
I could be all those wonderful things
If I took it day by day.
But instead I know I'll just lay here
And dream it all away.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Hey my friends and fellow poets and poem-readers(:I started writing my author's note but got carried away and now I'm just making it another chapter instead called Do You Love Yourself? It was way too long. But important, so read it, I'll publish it in a sec. I tossed my heart and mind and soul into it.
So as usual,
Vote, Comment, and
Follow Me For More Poems!~Dustin the Great
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The Things I Leave Unsaid
PoetryMy thoughts in poems. I'm not suicidal or even truly unhappy. I'm just confused and lost and I hope someone out there understands. These are the everyday thoughts I have that float around in my mind. This is my life, in poems. I like my poems and I...