Bad Blood

37.

The whole ride home all I could do was stare at the photos the midwife had printed off for us. Never in my wildest dreams had more than one baby even crossed my mind. And judging by Dans stunned silence, he was thinking the same. In no way was it a bad thing. It meant double the joy. And once again, another of our plans had changed.

Even when we arrived home, neither of us could speak. It felt as though we were walking around in a daze. In all the excitement I hadn't even realised that Dan had flown ten hours, missing a show, to be here with me. And now I had him home, all to myself and I wanted to make the most of him. I went into the kitchen to make a cup of tea, but Dan ran ahead of me.

'Go sit down. I'll make a drink.'

'I can-' He cut me off.

'Sit down.' I liked him being bossy. I smiled and did as I was told.

While he was busy, I had a chance to think some more, clutching the photo of the babies against my stomach. Twins. Insane. I wondered what they were. Boys or girls? One of each? It had been too early to see if they were identical or not. I wondered who they'd look like. I hoped they got Dans looks and talents.

'Twins.' Dan said as he came in with two cups in each hand. He passed me one and then sat beside me. He was smiling stupidly at me. It was infectious. I began to laugh and in turn he laughed. Before long we were both in stitches and I was sitting on top of him, pinning him on the sofa. I held his gaze for a long time, searching him. I was so glad to have him home. He quickly pecked my nose and gently rolled us over so I was laying down and he crouched on the floor. His hands cupped my stomach and he put his head right against me. 'Hello in there babies.' He whispered. I giggled. 'So, I guess I should introduce myself. I'm your Daddy. I'm fairly cool, you'll be hearing a lot of my voice. And this lovely warm womb is your Mummy. She's ok, I guess.' I slapped his head. 'Lets not cause Mummy anymore troubles hey? Because I love her very much and we need to take care of her.'

I was moved to tears. The days events had exhausted me. And I was so incredibly tired.

'Hey hey, what's wrong?' He let out a concerned laugh.

'Nothing.' He came up and hugged me. I buried my face into his neck, taking in a deep breath and catching his scent. He smelt like plane food. And then I realised I was hungry. Which upset me, because I was too tired to eat. He stood up, picked me up in his arms and took me up the stairs to bed.

'Stay right there. I'm ordering pizza.' He told me. I shook my head unbelievably at him. How could he be so perfect? And now I felt sad because I didn't deserve him. When he tried to ask me what was wrong I couldn't even answer through my own blubbing. So many emotions and hormones were clashing inside me. I barely felt in control of my thoughts. And then suddenly my mind switched to a new problem.

'We can't live here. We need to move.' I sobbed. I loved my house. And we had plenty of bedrooms. But the garden wasn't big enough and there were no good schools nearby. And it was by a main road. What about pollution. Could we even stay in London? And then there was Dans car, it was too small and I couldn't drive. I needed to learn to drive. I needed to baby proof everything. Who would look after them while I worked. Hell, who would look after them with me while Dan was away? One baby, sure, easy. But two? Shit.

I managed to tell him all my woes and he shot each of them down, assuring me we would cope. He'd get a nanny, we would move at some point, and that he'd love me even if I gained three hundred pounds.

Two weeks later, after a second scan and all was still well, both babies were growing nicely, we could tell people. Dans parents were the first to know. It was a shock for Isla and Rod, especially as they didn't know we'd even got together.

'Oh I've gained a daughter and two grandchildren in one go.' Isla had sobbed. They were over the moon. As was Jazz and her family. And Dans other two bandmates. Everyone was so excited for us and relieved that we'd finally got our act together and committed ourselves. It had only taken twenty four years!

Because of it being a twin pregnancy, I was constantly at the hospital for scans and tests. Dan couldn't always come with me, but I had an army of people lining up to see our babies. At twenty weeks Dan had cancelled a show in Sweden so he could be here. It was there we'd found out they were identical boys. This had of course set me off in tears. Two little boys. Dan cried. I cried. The midwife cried. I just didn't think it possible to be so happy.

Work was impossible. I had no choice but to go on maternity leave. I just couldn't keep my eyes open and there was no travelling allowed. It was devastating, after working so hard for so long, to just walk away, but I had two very important reasons to stop. And it meant that when Dan was home from touring, I got to spend that time with him. With each visit home he would exclaim how much I'd changed. I couldn't see it, only when looking back at the photos of my stomach I could see how much they'd grown. And Dan was there to feel the first, painful, kicks.

We'd been asleep in bed, my bump pressed against his back, when one of them booted me so hard that even Dan jolted awake. And from then on, the moving, kicking, budging didn't stop. It seemed that my boys were on opposite sleeping schedules, so whilst one was resting, the other was kicking. I could sit and watch my stomach shifting from left to right. Twice I was able to catch a foot and hold it there.

'We've got a pair of footballers I think.' Dan had laughed after I'd been resting my cup of tea on my bump and one of them had kicked it off.

'Anything but football.' I sighed.

'Dancers then.' I suggested. I just hoped they didn't inherit Dan's or my dancing skills. He'd done as he'd said, singing and talking to them constantly and he had moved his piano into our home and would play for hours. I couldn't wait for them to be here. It was going to be tough work but it would be worth every sleepless night and every nappy change. My initial fears were replaced by pure happiness. And I had never been more in love with Dan. I was glad we were doing this together.

With four months to go til the big day, and I'd be having a c section the week before Christmas, we decided to sort out the nursery. Each day something was being delivered to the house, cots, baskets, baby swings and bags of clothes. Two sets of everything. As well as everything we'd been given from family and friends. It had all sat in the spare room, waiting to be put together. Dan got the blue paint and I began putting tiny baby clothes on hangers and putting them into the matching wardrobes. With each baby grow and pair of dungarees I held them to my stomach. It wasn't long until I'd have the babies to dress, and they would be very fashionable babies. Except for the matching elves outfits.

'Gosh that stinks.' I told him. Despite opening the windows to air it out, the fumes were going to my head.

'I think you should probably leave the room.' He said, concerned. I didn't argue. I'd just go in later when it was done.

'I gonna go for a little run.' I told him. He didn't agree with my running, but it wasn't like I was breaking speed records or going for a marathon. It was more like a waddling jog. I kissed him goodbye and left him to it. We still had the cots and changing tables to build and then everything would be ready.

I'd been gone half an hour, working up a little sweat, when I turned the corner onto our road and was met by a swarm of police cars parked outside the house. Fear pumping through my veins, I sprinted the last hundred metres to see what was going on. There were dozens of police men and my front door had been kicked in.

'What the hell is going on?!' I demanded. I tried to push my way through into my house but was held back. 'I live here! Let me in! Where's Dan?'

'Step back please Ma'am.'

'No, you step back. Where's my boyfriend? Tell me what's going on right now.' But no one would answer. I only had to wait a moment before I saw Dan being pushed out the door.

'Don't panic.' He told me. I went to hug him but was once again held back. And then I noticed his hands were cuffed behind his back.

'Danny?' I began to cry.

'Everything's gonna be ok.'

'Whats happening?' I begged him to tell me.

'Ive been arrested on suspicion of murder.' He said as he was forced into a police car.

*****

Only four more chapters to post :(