Depression and self harm quotes and poems.

157

I thought I finally moved on after months of waiting and crying just wondering if I would ever see your face again.
I did last night. I kept running into you. That's when I realized I wasn't over what happened. Every single feeling I thought was gone. The love, pain, and fear all came back and nearly knocked me over. I couldn't breathe. You probably don't care though anymore can if you did see the way I trying to avoid looking at you or the way I was shaking so much and breathing hard to keep my panic and tears back. After all if you still cared maybe you would have said something rather than just stare at me.
I don't even know why it hurts so much. I've never felt anything like any of those feelings for anyone. Not one person but you. I don't know why. I don't even know what I'm feeling because I'm drowning in my thoughts. If you ever see this just know that I never once lied to you.
I promised I would never let you go.
I promised that I loved you and cared about you.
I promised that I would never forget you no matter what.
I promised that you were my everything.
I promised that I would never be the one to leave.
I promised that I would never break up with you.
I kept them all still to this day even after almost a year.

I still can't get you out of my head. I can't let these feelings for you go. I don't know how.

I still love you and I still care so much about you. I still wish the best for you.

I didn't forget you. Every day I spend wondering what we could have been like if you were still by my side.

You still are my everything. You mean the world to me. You always have. I don't think that will ever change.

I wasn't the one to leave. You just decided that you didn't want me one day and I never heard from you again.

I didn't do the breaking up. I had to wake up one morning to a huge fucking break up text the day of one of the most important nights of my life. I couldn't breathe. All I could do was run to the bathroom, turn on the water and cry. I stayed there on the floor for 2 hours because I could calm down.

I'm still not over you no matter how hard I try.  Hell I've even dated two people but none of them lasted over a week because I couldn't get you out of my head. I thought I liked them but really I guess I did it so I could feel loved again. So I didn't hurt them with rejection. I really just did it to not feel so alone without you. I hate that. I hate that I did that. I shouldn't have don't that. I regret it. I don't regret you though. I never will. I'll always worry about you. Every day. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I can't do what you told me to. I'm so sorry I can't be happy without knowing that you're okay. I'm so sorry. I failed you. I couldn't be who you needed me to be. That's why you left. I just wasn't good enough.