Love On the Brain (Corey Crawford)

21| First Time

Corey

January in Chicago is a lot like January in Canada. Cold. And while there's the everyday struggle to stay warm, there is a lot of perks of being up north in the winter time. And here in Chicago there's a big perk, and it's a sheet of ice in the heart of the city in the middle of the park giving an amazing view to skate around.

I haven't been to that particular rink in my years living and working in the city. I've played games in the great outdoors a few times and skated in places like Wrigley Field and Nationals Park, but never in Millennium Park. And today that was about to change because Jessica told me she's never even skated before and I insisted that we went there for her first time. I waited until the park was closed to bring her out so she didn't trip over a little kid or get laughed at if she falls. Plus the city at night was amazing and all the Christmas stuff was still up in the park and it looked so nice, I was ready to make some new memories with my favorite girl.

So we put on a bunch of layers to shelter us from the cool Chicago winds and head to the park. I find her a pair of skates that covered her tiny feet and help her get laced up. Once I finish tying her skates she looks up at me a little questionably as she places them on the ground. She was insistent that she didn't want to make herself look stupid and fall on her face but I promised her she could never look stupid to me. So I finally reach my hand out and she places her glove covered one in mine. I pull her up and help her find some stable ground to walk on. We slowly walk to the edge of the ice before she looks out.

"You go first" she insists and I laugh. I hit the ice and turn around so I can help her out. I grab her hands and she slips and slides out to the ice with me.

Once she was all the way out she stands there staring at the ice.

"Okay, first thing is first. Don't look at your feet, look at me" I say as I pull her chin up. She stares into my eyes and I feel my heart start to beat faster and faster. It seemed like a good idea at the moment but now I'm nervous too. "Good. Now I'm going to start skating backwards and I just want you to walk with me" I say and she nods.

We start to go around and around and she picks it up kind of quickly. Eventually I can skate beside her but I keep her hand in my hand. Her grip was so tight on me she couldn't let go anyway.

"I can't believe you talked me into this" she giggles as she slides across against the smooth surface.

"It's not that bad" I defend.

"It's not. I kinda enjoy it. I just never thought I would ever be the one to ice skate" she claims.

"That doesn't sound like something a life coach would say" I admit.

"I have weak ankles" she defends.

"Oh, I guess that's a good reason. But I think you're doing pretty good" I insist.

"Well I haven't fallen yet so that has to mean something" she claims.

"It means you have a good teacher" I joke as she lets out a gasp.

"Wow. You're something else" she insists.

"So you keep saying" I smirk.

After a while we decide to take a break and chill out on the side of the rink. I catch Jessica looking around and she just had to smile as the city reflects in her beautiful eyes. That same wonder and amazement you can find in this city can be found in her, and it was just as beautiful.

"So how long have you lived here" I wonder.

"Ever since I graduated college and got a job out here" she says.

"Is this always where you wanted to live" I question.

"Yeah, actually. When I was a little girl my dad said he would move us up here if he had the choice. He loved this city, loved the sports, loved the sights, loved the people. He would takes us up here every chance he had, we would spend summers at the beach and winters at the park. We always talked about ice skating here but never got the chance to" she says.

"What do you miss most about your dad" I wonder.

"His sense of humor. Even the bad days weren't that bad. He never let the hard times show around me and Carter, that's why his death was so big to me. Until we started family therapy I didn't even know there was a problem. And I honestly thought it was fixed" she claims.

"Are there minds out there that can't be changed" I wonder.

"Yeah, there defiantly are. Some people didn't want to accept that there are two sides to every story and that there's always something better out there than what they know. They don't want to see things through someone else's eyes, sometimes they don't want to see the rainbow and would much rather walk in the rain. Having a one track mind is just as dangerous as having a broken one" she claims.

"What is wrong with mine" I ask.

"Nothing, absolutely nothing" she says as she turns to me.

"So you're just suckering the Blackhawks out of money and using this gig as a excuse to hang out with me" I tease and she shakes her head.

"No. But I can't fix something that isn't broken. And you Corey, you're not broken. You're lost and a little naive, but you're not broken. All I'm doing is helping you see what's already inside of you. Like your writings, those are you words, no one else's. They've been in you this whole time begging to get out. A broken person wouldn't be able to write every single day and know what they're saying. Understand how those words have weight and how they fit together like a puzzle. There's nothing I can do for you that you can't do for yourself, I'm just here to help you find yourself and make a life you're happy about" she explains.

"You're kinda like a guardian angel" I say and she laughs.

"I guess that's one way to put it" she says.

"I know you have helped a lot of people, but I really am so thankful you decided to help me. I can almost assure you that if it wasn't for you I wouldn't have much of anything right now. Not hockey or friends or my something to live for" I say and she smiles.

"You found it" she wonders.

"I'm looking at her" I say. She just smiles at me as she messes with her hair like she does every time I say stuff like that.

"How about we skate again" she says trying to change the subject.

"I'm down" I admit.

We mess around for a little before it starts to get late. We begin to head off for the night before Jess drags her skate along the ice and her toe pick gets stuck in it. She trips and gets sent to the ground and I grab her before she hits the ice too hard. We both fall down but neither of us that bad as we try not to hit the ground too hard. Before I can even ask if she was okay I hear her laughing and that made me smile, her laugh was so melodic, it was like a beautiful song you want to play again and again. She rolls over so she is laying on her back like I was as her hair sprawls across the surface.

"Oh man, and to think I almost got through the night without falling" she giggles.

"Ain't nothing wrong with falling" I insist.

"Of course not. Just doesn't feel too good" she admits.

"Are you okay" I ask as I sit up. I see her with her long hair laid out on the ice and she nods.

"Yeah. I'm just really liking this view" she claims