Love On the Brain (Corey Crawford)

5| Home Sweet Home

Jessica

As fall starts to take over the city I see the people within it start to change too. People pack away their swimsuits and bring out their sweaters. There's pumpkin spiced everything around town and the leaves start to fall to the ground. And while I would rather be outside in the park drinking hot chocolate and people watching, I had to go back home for a little. It wasn't too far from Chicago, I was from a city few hours south in the capital of the state. But it was finally time for me to take the drive down and be with my family.

I pull up a gravel road and up to my childhood home. I smile to myself as I get out the car, it's just as I remembered it. I let my heavy feet carry me up into the porch and straight to the door. Before I can even knock the door swings open and I see my Mom standing there with her arms wide open. She pulls me into a great big hug as I hug her back.

"God I've missed you so much" she insists.

"I missed you too momma. How have things been around here" I wonder as I walk inside. I see my old dog Bailey running around and I call her over so I can pet her. She happily jumps into my arms as I give her all the loving she deserves.

"It's been pretty good. Quiet as usual, but your brother and his family will be in town later tonight so I'm sure that will change" she tells me.

"Sweet" I smile. 

"And until then you and I can catch up while we eat some cookies I made" she claims.

"Which is the real reason I'm here" I tease.

We head into the kitchen and she pulls out the bin of cookies she always has, this was a family recipe that's been with us for generations, and it'll be there for future ones as long as I get a say in it.

"So who are you working with now, anyone interesting" she asks.

We don't usually talk about my work because I'm not allowed to say much. But she makes sure she's caught up in my life to the best of her abilities.

"I'm working with a professional hockey player" I say and she laughs.

"How in the world did that happen" she questions. She knew I wasn't that into sports or anything like that.

"They needed a new brain and I wanted a challenge" I shrug. To put it in the simplest terms.

"And how is it going so far" she wonders.

"Pretty good I would say. He's a tough nut to crack, I'll give him that. I can tell he's sheltered about a lot of things and didn't really want to be there at first. But even though he won't admit it, I can tell he wants help trying to figure some things out about him and how to change. He's screaming out for help from everywhere but his mouth. I hope I can actually help him and he doesn't do good for a little then he just turn right back around into his old habits" I admit.

"Is he cute" she asks and I gasp.

"Mom" I whine.

"Oh my god... you think he's cute" she squeals as I start to blush.

"He's not bad looking" I admit.

"Awww you guys should date" she claims.

"I can't date a client. There's too much on the line to be threatened with trying to make a relationship" I insist.

"Not everyone who needs help needs a life coach. Maybe he wants a friend who will listen to him and someone to guide him. Or maybe a girlfriend who just so happens to be you" she says not so subtly.

"That's not how this works. Our relationship has to have specific dynamics that do not include romantic interests" I say.

"Do you like him" she asks.

"I hardly know him" I defend.

"But you like him" she says.

"I don't, maybe. Maybe not. I know nothing about him or hockey and if it wasn't for this job there is no way we would ever end up together. A guy like him never ends up with girls like me" I insist.

"Surrrre" she says and I roll my eyes. It never ends with this one.

Eventually my brother and his wife and kids arrive and it was time. We pack up and head over to the cemetery down the street with a bunch of flowers and American flags. We go to where my father laid to rest and gather around the tombstone. I feel a tear shed as I look down at the grave. Today would have been his 56th birthday. I feel like I lost so much time with him.

"What was Grandpa like" my brothers son asks and I smile.

"He was really funny. Had a dad joke for anything and could make the most difficult situations a little bit better. He used to pick on your father all the time" I laugh.

"I kinda miss him picking on me" my brother Carter admits.

"Is that why you pick in me now" his son asks and we all kinda laugh.

"Actually it is" he admits. I know my brother wanted to be like dad in a lot of ways, I think he's doing a pretty good job.

After a while we head back to the house where mom makes us dinner. She hangs out with Carters wife in the kitchen and I hang out with my older brother in the living room.

"So mom tells me you're talking to a guy" he claims and I roll my eyes.

"He's a client" I defend.

"Oh... you're being defensive. Spill it" he begs.

"Are we 12" I ask.

"Are you avoiding the topic" he counters.

"My business is none of your business" I argue.

"And this isn't about business. This is about my little sister who thinks the mind is the key to everything just because it was to Dad. But you couldn't have stopped him Jess, you weren't the problem. And I know you love this job because you have the power to help people like Dad but this is their lives that you're messing with. You can't just slip in and out of someone's mind and I know for a fact you won't forget them either.

But your job isn't just a job. It's your life too, and you know just as well as everyone that you cannot prevent the inevitable. If you were meant to be with this man you will be, and the fact that you're denying that anything is happening between you two tell me that you have feelings for him" he insists.

"I mean... he's great. Most people wouldn't let me in like he did, he obviously didn't want to do this but he's never told me no. It was almost too easy, the way he let me in. And even though he's had his doubts he always tries for me. But I can't say that I have feelings for him or that he has feelings for me. It's not that simple" I say.

"When was the last time you went on a date with a guy you were actually interested in" he asks and I shrug. "Because you seem pretty interested in this guy."

"Well yeah, he's no like anyone I've ever worked with or even known before. He's a interesting man, I find him very intriguing and I like learning about him. But that doesn't mean I like him" I defend.

"It kinda does" he says.

"Says who" I ask.

"Me" he teases and I nudge him. "Listen, I just want you to be happy, okay" he asks.

"I'm happy" I assure him. "I really am."