Finest Jin

Third Time's the Charm

The rest of the week flew by, with the only highlight being when BTS fan sign tickets came available for purchase. I managed to score one for each of us and circled the date in March. On the weekend, I took my family to a raccoon cafe. These bizarre cafes were one of the many things that had made us select this country. Canada just didn't have these sorts of fun dining experiences. We laughed and took post - worthy selcas with the raccoons, each other and the unique treats served. My soul felt refreshed seeing how happy my children were. It was their first experience out of country, first experience with a foreign language and their first time in a public school. Homeschooling had been our saviour when the world came crashing down. My husband had died when the children had been toddlers. I was pregnant with his son. The littlest was adopted 3 years later. We had been each others' island in the wild storms. Sadly, the storms had been fierce for a single mom of 4 and we were drowning in the waves. After a decade of treading hard to keep our heads above water, I had decided we needed a change. I went back to school, completed my degree and was soon after on a plane to a brand new world. 

Korea was our rebirth.

Two Mondays in a row had breathed new life into the embers of my life. It felt good to be excited about seeing a handsome man I had no hope of ever being with. A teenaged crush in a Noona body. I embraced it just the same and prayed that the briefest of moments weren't the end of this for me. 

I was early to the cafe the next Monday evening. It was calmer than the week before, much to my relief. I stole into my cushy chair, saving it with my sketchbook and pencil case. I ordered a hot drink and sat down, headphones on, BTS blaring. I had almost 3 drawings planned out before I became vaguely aware of my surroundings again. Someone was standing directly in front of me, holding hot chocolates topped with whipped cream. I scanned up the lean, muscled body, then startled as I realized how close he was leaning over me. My jump surprised him and his reaction was far better than mine had been; he let out a "Whoa!" and pulled his hands back, sloshing the drinks onto his hands and over my lap. 

"Ye-ouch!" I rose quickly to my feet, pulling the fabric from my legs and dancing a little on the spot. Jins' face was instantly red, and a bit pained. I relieved his hands of the drinks and quickly blew on his singed skin. When the urgency had passed, I gazed up into his face, pulling the headphones from my ears. He was humiliated. 

"Annyeonghaseyo." I smiled first. His distress was heartbreaking. 

"Annyeonghaseyo." He replied. 

"Was this for me?" I gestured to the hot chocolate. He nodded. "Thank you." I pushed extra emotion into my response, feeling his embarrassment. I picked up the cup, took a sip and smiled brightly, ensuring he saw. "It's very good." I passed him his cup. Jin was still flustered and it was apparent that this was not a regular state for him. I clicked off the iPod and shoved the headphones into my bag. I didn't want the music to make him uncomfortable.

My chair was wet so I swiftly beckoned the wait staff and moved instead to the other end of the couch, my back to the window. "Please sit." I patted the couch and he obediently sat. "Thank you...thank you very much." Jin was making an effort to hold eye contact. "How is your hand?" 

"Good, thank you." He held up the palm briefly and I saw the skin pink but sealed. 

He gestured to my legs, inquiring. I passed it off. "They are fine. No big deal." 

A busboy blotted up the spilled drinks and hustled back behind the counter. We sat in silence, the awkwardness growing thicker by the minute. I finally shook my head and held my hand out to Jin.

"Nae ileum eun Telly-hamnida." Jin looked up at me and then laughed. He sat up and took my hand, shaking it firmly in his own.

"Jin-hamnida." I caught his eye and smiled. This was much better. 

Jin turned out to be a good conversationalist. His english surprised me and he was helpful and forgiving with my halting Hangul. We kept it superficial. I enjoyed the opportunity to have those dark chocolate eyes and milk chocolate voice to myself. The staff kept the hot chocolates coming and, at Jins' instructions, had started adding flavouring to them. I took a sip of my third cup. "Mmm...caramel." Jin raised his eyebrows, then tasted his cup experimentally. 

"Mmm...strawberry." He mimicked. I laughed. "You...taste?" He offered the mug. My heart flipped. Did I want a taste? I would taste anything this man offered me. Anything...I bit my lip, praying my thoughts weren't written on my face. He held my gaze, inquisitively. Damn. I feigned innocence.

"Sure. Here, try mine." We swapped cups to try the flavours, nodding and making appropriate yummy sounds. Then we traded back. A wait staff supervisor came over apologizing about the spills and set down a plate of cookies. Jin positively lit up, making me chuckle. He bit into one right off the bat and I set about folding away my drawing notebook to free up my hands. In a burst of confidence, Jin reached over and pulled it from my bag, flipping it open. 

"Oh no! I'm not much of an artist..." He carefully viewed each drawing, nodding and pursing his lips. He handed it back with a smile. I slid it into the bag. We were seated shoulder to shoulder, my leg warm where it lay against his. Jin offered me cookies and small talk. I had hoped he would be fully relaxed by now but as I looked around, I saw why he wasn't. He kept a baseball cap low on his head, his eyes lowered. Despite giving him a respectful space, everyone in the cafe was very aware of his presence. Wait staff watched him out of the corner of their eye as they brought our drinks. Other patrons had their chairs angled to keep him in their sights. Jin was constantly on display. My heart sank. His lifestyle must be very stifling. 

In that moment, I realized also that it was possible that our Monday sanctuary was unlikely to stay such. Last week had been packed and the chance of glimpsing a superstar was very likely to be the reason. This week was also uncommonly full. I sighed. Jin was watching me closely, trying to discern my thoughts. I chugged down the hot chocolate. 

"Let's go for a walk." He swallowed his down, and nodded.

"Nae." We smiled.