t a n n e r *
TW: minimal mention of physical abuse
I've been home from school for maybe five minutes when I get the call. I pull my phone out of my pocket, answering the call to a very upset--and very close to tears-- Jace. Jace, my (ex?) best friend; we had a fight about a month ago and he stopped talking to me. It was over his then-girlfriend, now ex, who I walked in on having sex with a teacher. He didn't believe me and accused me of making it up because I didn't like her, which was true, I didn't like her, but I wouldn't have made something like that up. Anyways, they got caught on video and Jace saw it, but he still refuses to talk to me. I have no clue why he's calling me, but something--my gut?--tells me I need to answer it.
"Hey, look, I know you probably don't want to talk to me but I didn't know who else to call." He says when I press answer.
"What's going on?" I ask, not rudely or harshly, but curiously.
"I came home from school and I couldn't find Clayton (his brother) anywhere, but I knew he was home because his car was in the driveway. I found him, I think he's dead, Tanner. He's in the bathroom, a glass bottle is broken on the floor and he's on the floor, and there's blood everywhere and, Tanner, I'm scared," he says, rushing through the explanation.
"Okay, okay, calm down...did you call the police? An ambulance?" I ask him, running my fingers through my hair.
"Yes, yes, I did all of that...Tanner, please come."
"I'll be there as soon as I can."
"Don't hang up. I'm scared,"
"I wasn't--I won't, just try to breathe. I'm backing out of my driveway now,"
I stay on the phone with him until the ambulance and police get there, which is when I'm about five or ten minutes away. When I pull in the driveway, the back of the ambulance is open, paramedics standing outside of it as they try to put the stretcher in the back. Jace is standing with a group of police officers in the middle of the driveway. They all look up as I pull up to the curb and jump out of my truck, walking over to them.
"Do you know of anyone who didn't like your brother? Maybe wanted to get revenge on him?" An officer is asking Jace as I walk up to them. Jace looks up, grabbing my arm and pulling me close to him, burrowing into my chest.
"No, sir," Jace tells the officer. "I have no clue who did this or why. Is he okay?"
"We don't know, son,"
Jace calls out to a paramedic, who says she doesn't know yet and asks if he wants to ride in the ambulance to the hospital. He looks to me.
"Will you please come with me?" he asks. "I don't deserve for you to say yes, I know, but I can't do this by myself."
I nod at him and he looks back to the paramedic, telling her that he'll ride with me.
The ambulance pulls out, the police leaving shortly after the ambulance does, following asking Jace a few more questions.
"Thank you for coming," Jace says, looking at me as the police pull out; we're still standing in his driveway. "I can't lose him, Tanner, he's all I have left,"
"Jace, look at me, you won't lose him, but no, he's not. He's not all you have left," I say, looking at him.
"Who else do I have, Tanner? I pushed you away! My sisters are out of state, my parents--they hate me!"
"Jace, you still have me. I'm still here," I say, softer, as I walk closer to him.
He looks up at me, all kinds of emotions in his eyes. He meets my gaze, and grabs me, pulling me down to his face and pressing his lips against mine. I stumble forward a little, shocked. He pulls away and looks at me. Neither of us says anything; I pull him forward and kiss him again.
We're sitting in the hospital waiting room, waiting to hear something--anything from the doctors. Jace doesn't say anything, but grabs my hand and slides his fingers through mine. I squeeze his hand softly, to let him know that I'm here.
"Holland?" A nurse calls out, and a little, precious old lady and her family get up and walk over to the desk. "Frank is doing amazing, and can see visitors." I hear her tell them. I can see the old lady's face light up at this news, her smile becoming contagious, Jace and I can't help but smile either.
"Porter?" The same nurse calls out a few minutes later as lullaby plays throughout the hospital, signaling a baby's birth. A man, probably in his 30s, stands up, pulling who I assume to be his kids with him, but I am soon corrected on this. "Your sister did amazing," the nurse says, addressing the man, and then turns to the kids. "Mommy did great! Daddy is waiting for you guys in the room! Do you want to go see your new baby sister??" The kids squeal, resulting in being shushed by their uncle. I watch as the uncle and his niece and nephew follow a nurse down the hallway.
"Jackson?" A different nurse this time, calls out through the waiting room. A young boy, probably mine and Jace's age, maybe a little older, stands up, carrying a toddler in his arms. "Your mom is going to be fine. She is in recovery now." I can see a weight visibly lifted off the boy's chest. "You may see her in roughly thirty minutes or less."
The boy nods, looking at the little girl in his arms. "Did you hear that, Maya? Mommy is okay!" he tells her. She looks up and smiles, turning around and seeing me. She waves a little hand at me and I wave back, smiling. The boy turns to Jace and I, a smile spreading across his face as he sees us. He thanks the nurse, and then walks over to us.
"Hi, this is probably going to sound weird and insane, but thank you for not being afraid to hold hands in a public place. My boyfriend and I always love to see other couples not being afraid in public." He tells us, smiling. I look at Jace and back at the boy, smiling wider.
"Thank you," I tell him. "I'm Tanner, and this is Jace,"
"I'm Brady, and this is my little sister, Maya," the boy, who now has a name, says.
Jace and I talk to Brady a little longer, Jace holding Maya in his lap after she crawls up there. By the time Brady and Maya get called back to see their mother, both Jace and I are friends with him on Facebook.
After Brady and Maya's figures fade, Jace leans over and leans into my chest.
"Williamson?" a nurse calls, finally calling Jace's last name. Jace and I get out of the chairs and walk up to the front desk.
"Your brother is awake, he is doing fine. He had to get a few stitches, and he has a minor concussion, but that is all. We were questioning him a little bit more to figure out who did all of it."
"Did he say? Does he remember?" Jace asks immediately.
"Yes, he said so he does remember, although I'm technically not permitted to tell you right now, so we'll let him tell you." the nurse says. "If you'll follow me, I'll show you to his room."
We follow the nurse, who's nametag reads 'Kami'. When we walk into the hospital room, Clayton is sitting up and looking out the window. He looks over at us when we enter, a smile immediately appearing on his face when he sees his little brother. There are two chairs beside his bedside and Jace immediately sits down in one, but I hang back, hesitating. Jace turns around and looks at me.
"I didn't know if you wanted me in here," I say.
Jace gets out of the chair and grabs my wrist, pulling me over to a chair. "Sit," he demands and I sit down.
"What happened?" Jace asks, almost as soon as Kami has left.
"You know how Mom had been acting weird these past few days? It's because Dad was hiding out in the attic. He came up behind me with a beer bottle, said some things and then knocked me out. I don't know why he was there or where Mom or Dad is now. I think they ran, especially since Dad is wanted for some crimes." Clayton tells us.
Jace looks up. "I should've known..." he says.
"No, you shouldn't have," Clayton tells him.
"Clayton...?" Jace asks his brother timidly.
"Yeah?"
"This might not be the time to say this but, um, I-I'm--uh, Tanner and I are dating," Jace says, finally spitting it out. Both Clayton and I look at him. I didn't know we were official; of course, I don't mind, I just didn't think...I didn't think we would be becoming official this soon.
"Well," Clayton begins. "Congratulations, guys, I'm happy for you. I'm also happy you finally realized that you liked him," he addresses Jace during the last part and Jace blushes.
"Wait, what?" I ask.
"Whether he wants to admit it or not," Clayton begins. "Jace has had a huge crush on you for a few years now,"
"Really?" I ask, surprised, and turning to Jace, who's turned even redder.
"I didn't want to admit it, and I think that's why I took our fight harder than I needed to, I didn't doubt you or that she was cheating, I actually kind of expected it, but I knew if we broke up, I'd have to face my feelings for you--my feelings for you that had become increasingly more prominent. And I didn't want to do that, because I was scared--scared of many things, but mostly scared to be rejected, scared that I would lose you and our friendship...I just thought the longer I put it off, the longer I hid it, from myself and you, the better it would be, but that was wrong...it was so wrong, it just made everything worse." Jace says, looking at me, forgetting, I think, that Clayton is there.
"Go ahead and kiss him," Clayton says, although I'm not exactly sure he was saying it to. "I know you want to." Jace takes the chance, and leans forward, pressing his lips against mine, but pulling away a few seconds later because of Clayton.
That night, Jace (and Clayton) opt for staying at my house; my parents already said it was okay. So, Jace and I leave the hospital at 6:23 PM and head to my house, stopping at Taco Bell to get food and taking it to my house, where we go upstairs and eat. After we've finished eating, Jace turns to me and presses his lips against mine softly. I grab his waist, gently, pulling him closer to me, and kissing him back. He climbs on top of me, putting his hands on the back of my neck and then sliding them down my shoulders to my chest.
Jace cuddles into me that night, scooting as close to me as he can and telling me to hold him tighter. I wrap my arms around his body lightly, as well as wrapping a leg around his waist. He leans his head against my chest, looking up at me every so often until he falls asleep. I press my lips to his forehead tenderly before I close my eyes, welcoming sleep gratefully, which comes within minutes of trying to fall asleep.
12/19/19
