i s a i a h *
I'm over at Carson's, my best friend, house. We're sitting on his bed, talking about a million different things within the span of about three minutes a topic when I bring up a topic that I probably shouldn't have.
"Hey, you know Amelia Hargroves?" I ask Carson, looking up at him and meeting his gaze.
"Yeah," he says. "Why?"
"She likes you,"
He nods and begins to seem annoyed.
"You should see where it goes!"
"Yeah, well, I don't like her,"
"Do you like someone?"
"Yes," he says after a moment of silence.
"Do I know her?" I ask him.
He gets off his bed suddenly and goes into his bathroom that's attached to his bedroom and slams the door.
I look around. Maybe I shouldn't have brought it up? Or maybe he just needed to use the bathroom really badly?
That last theory hits the fan after he's been in the bathroom for about fifteen minutes. I get off his bed and go over to the bathroom door, knocking on it softly.
"C?" I ask through the door. "Are you okay?"
There's no response.
"C?" I ask again, knocking harder this time. "Are you okay? Do you need anything?"
"No," he says, his voice low and shaky.
"'No' what?"
"I'm not okay,"
"What's wrong? I'm sorry, I shouldn't have mentioned Amelia, I just thought you liked her."
"I did when I was younger. I don't like her now..."
"Oh," I say, sliding down the door and sitting on the floor, leaning against the door. "Well, that's okay...people change. Is that why you're upset?"
"No, I'm upset because I want someone I can't have,"
"Why can't you have them?"
"I just can't, Isaiah," he snaps, and silence falls between us and the door.
After about ten more minutes of silence, I say his name once more.
"Well, you know I'm here for you right?" I say, hoping that he'll reply. I hate when he's sad, I just want to wrap him in my arms and kiss him until neither of us can breathe.
"Yeah, I know, Isaiah," he says softly.
"I love you, you know that too, right?"
"Yeah,"
Silence falls once more and I lean my head back against the door.
We sit in silence for another ten or fifteen minutes.
"C?" I say.
No response. Maybe he fell asleep.
"Hey, C?" I ask again.
No response. He's probably fallen asleep.
"I think I'm gonna head home, okay?" I say.
When I'm met with no response, I stand up, but before I can take a step the bathroom door swings open and Carson stands there, looking at me.
"Why?" He asks me.
"You're not feeling well, and I figured you'd probably want to be alone..."
He shakes his head. "No," he says softly, grabbing my hand and sliding his fingers through mine, but only for a moment, and then he puts both of his hands on my waist and pushes me backward. I fall back on his bed and watch as he climbs on top of me. He sits on top of me but makes no move to do anything else.
'I want you' is what I want to say; what I want him to say, but I'm scared to say it, and he doesn't say anything.
After five minutes (give or take) of him sitting on top of me, he bends down over me.
"Don't go," he whispers, leaning his head against mine.
"I won't," I say, looking into his eyes. I put my hand on the back of his neck and hook my lips with his gently. I move my other hand and put it on the other side of his neck, still kissing him. He slides his top lip over top of my bottom lip, sucking gently. Somehow, I manage to sit up and keep him on my lap and now both of my hands are on his waist. One of his hands cups my cheek, and the other one rests on my chest. His mouth opens against mine and then closes over my top lip. He breaks the kiss to stand up and pulls me off the bed and into his arms, where he stumbles backward and crashes back on the bed, taking control of it. His hands run, up and down, the length of my ribs on both sides as his lips press softly against mine. I groan a little as he nips at my bottom lip, allowing him the time to slip his tongue into my mouth; he smiled at this, squeezing a little right at my sides.
"Baby," he whispers against my lips when he pulls away briefly and leans his head against mine. "Oh, baby," I like it when he calls me 'baby', I realize. I want to beg for him to do it again. Over and over. But I also don't want to break our kiss.
"Say it again," I say quietly, a begging tone in my voice. He smiles and bites his bottom lip before leaning back down and kissing me roughly, but still gentle.
"Baby," he says again and I feel his lips moving against mine to form the words. My heart flutters—it feels like it could and —might actually— flutter out of my chest; I let out a groan once more, this time, however, it sounds more like a whimper than a groan. He smiles against my lips as he moves his kisses from my lips to my jawline and neck.
"Mmmm," I moan, whimpering. "Oooh,"
I feel him smile against my neck and when he looks back up at me, his blue-gray eyes are twinkling at me. He pulls my bottom lip down with his pointer finger, meeting my eyes. He leans back down and kisses me once again, and I squeeze his waist with my hands, being gentle so I don't hurt him.
"Oh baby boy," he says against my lips, his voice low and seductive. "Don't make me act up,"
I feel all kinds of things at that; my heart nearly jumps out of my chest.
That night, Carson has me pulled into his arms and is holding me against him tightly.
"I'm sleepy," I whine.
He laughs and kisses my forehead. "Then go to sleep, baby,"
I nod, but before I close my eyes, I grab his face, turning it toward me and pressing our lips together, then, when I pull away, I close my eyes and welcome sleep gratefully.
1/20/20
I wrote this in the car with a blanket over my head 😂 also, this story, at least I thought, was a little different, but I love it a lot.
