Nobody Forgets Bill Cipher

Sink In Despair

"Grunkle Stan! Grunkle Ford!" Mabel's frantic cries drown out any sound of success. "Bill, hurry! Frick! What do I do?!"
My head spins with an energy crash and fear as I'm aware my legs are carrying me over to where Mabel and Yule lay.
     "Stan, call Pacifica and Dipper back over here!" I hear myself yelling, my voice hoarse from just minutes ago. "Quickly!"
I hear around is the members of the Society of the All-Seeing get to their feet and come closer. The nine of them check base with each other, then stand in silence around us five.
I feel my heart skip a beat and my chest tighten when I check Yule for a pulse. Barely there. No.
I look up at the Society and make eye contact with Dan. "Isn't there something you can do?" I ask, my voice thin. "I mean, you created technology to fight dream demons. There has to be something," I plead, ever so desperate.
Dan looks at the ground, grief pulling at the edges of his mouth. "Even we cannot cheat death. I'm sorry, Bill. I truly am."
I grip Yule's shoulder and will him to wake up. Just this once. This can't be happening. Why aren't Pacifica and Dipper here yet? Why does nobody speak? Why is my closest friend dying?
I hear two outcries growing louder as they near. I turn quickly, never letting go of Yule. "Please tell me we're not too late!" Pacifica's voice breaks and she and Dipper fall to the ground beside the rest of us. Dipper has broken out of his stupor and looks intently at the broken teen next to us.
"He's so pale..." Dipper whispers, his breath hitching. "Ford?" He looks up at his great uncle, for someone as talented and trusted as his uncle could surely save his friend. But Ford sadly shakes his head, regret showing on every inch of his face.
Dipper grabs his twin's hand, and she completely breaks down. Sobs wrack her body as her brother holds her close to him, his own tears falling from his tired eyes.
I just have to talk to him again. Just one more time. That's all I want. Please. "Yule?" No answer. "Hey." No, no...
     "Yule!" Pacifica takes a more direct approach. My heart is stuck in my throat. "Wake up! Frick, frick, dang it, open your eyes!"
     Stillness. That's all I feel around us. Something inside me dies as I notice how waxy Yule's complexion has become. Timidly, I touch his neck, right below his jaw, where his pulse will reassuringly throb against my fingers.
     But there's nothing there.
     "Pacifica..." My voice barely makes a whisper. She sees me pull my hand away and looks at me in utter disbelief.
     "No..." I see her eyes fill with agony and tears as she pulls Yule's torn body close to her own. She whimpers with uncontrolled cries, and she shakes as her hand presses against Yule's pallid face.
     Emptiness. I feel nothing. I don't even know what's happening. I shakily get to my feet.
     Mabel's sobs quiet as she watches my sudden, emotionless movement. "Bill...?"
     I can't explain how the weight of everything crashes upon me at this moment. Grief, agony, terror, horror, anger, sadness, guilt, and frustration are only the feelings I can put name to. Yule is dead. He's gone. I will never be able to talk to him again.
     I scream an agonizing wall of despair from the depths of my soul. He cannot be dead! Not my loving, thoughtful, precious brother...
     Enchantments and curses and every sort of spell in all sorts of languages from so many dimensions and galaxies pour from my mouth, I'm hardly aware of anything I'm saying, just anything, anything I can remember to bring him back to me!
     In this human form, I am worthless. I can do nothing. Another wave of grief washes over me, so strong that I fall to my knees in overwhelming pain. This is all because of me. And the worst part of it all is he was protecting me. It made all the sense in the world to him to trade his life for mine, and everyone else's, too.
     "Yule..." I hiccup and sob with my entire being until my entire body hurts. "Please, no..." My chest is tight with pain as I scream out again.
     I feel a soft hand rest against my tear-stained cheek. "Mabel..." I cry as she draws me into her steady embrace. I wrap my own arms around her as we sink in despair.
     "There were so many more things I wanted to say," I whisper through shaking breaths.
     "I know..." she murmurs back. "I know, I'm so sorry." I feel the dampness of her tears as she buries her face into my shoulder.
     "This is all my fault," I heave another heart-wrenching sob. "He is dead because-"
     "No." Mabel gasps and holds me tighter. "Love, he told you himself. You did not kill him. He chose this." Her voice breaks as she continues. "He didn't want this for us, for his family- I didn't ever want this. I- I loved him, too." She sniffles as fresh tears fall.
     "His family..." I choke out, shaking as dread overtakes me. "How can we even begin to tell them that- that-" My voice ceases to function, and I let my body slump in grief.
     Dipper gently lays his hand on my shoulder. It's all I can do to lift my head. "We'll do it together," he assures me firmly. "You are not alone."
     Vaguely, in the background, I hear Ford calling an ambulance. I absently wonder if the people in this town will treat this like they do Weirdmageddon. They'll take care of whatever needs to be fixed, then pretend the whole thing never happened.
     As soon as Ford finishes the call, he sits down next to us to ask us something. "Children, I'm so sorry that I have to ask you this, but it must be your decision, whatever you feel best to happen. Will you all be the ones to inform Yule's family of this tragedy, or shall we let the authorities handle it?"
     How can we ever make a decision as tough as this? How can I go up to his mother, his brother, and tell them that her son, his little brother, is dead?
     On the other hand, leaving it to the authorities could turn out just a terribly. They have no connection to Yule. Their apologies will be empty, meaningless, not personal at all.
     I notice that everyone is waiting for my answer. I take a deep, shuddering breath. There's no other way we can do this. "We will," I conclude. "They deserve nothing less."
     Silence follows us for what seems like the longest time; we heartbroken friends, our mourning never enough for the most precious friend we ever had.