Nobody Forgets Bill Cipher

Never Feel It Again

     I call Merrily as Dipper calls Pacifica and we tell them that there's been a slight change in plans and that we'll need them over as soon as possible. It works with their schedules, so we wait for their arrivals.
     Stand, Ford, and Soos, it seems, are not able to see Yule, though they were just as astonished as we were when we told them the news.
     The three of us who can see Yule, plus him, sit in the living room, delivering all sorts of questions for Yule and also expressions of relief.
     "So, Yule," I ask him, leaning forward in interest, "you're the one who will know best: do you think Pacifica and Merrily will be able to see you?"
     "Pacifica..." he thinks for a moment, then his face crumples. "She, too, begged me to stay alive. She told me of all the things we never got to do. I promised her we would do all of it." His voice falls to a whisper, "I promised her I wouldn't die."
     "I'd say there's a pretty good chance, then," Dipper remarks with a nod.
     Yule's expression doesn't brighten. "What all happened? I feel like I missed so much... The last thing I remember is when we all had to cover our ears when Bill did that weird thing with those energy transfer flowers. I was barely able to bring my hands up."
     I grimace as I believe that I caused Yule more pain than he needed to endure. "Well, that stunned and hurt the nightmare fiends, and then the portal closed, taking them with it." I look at him, grief flooding my body. "A couple minutes later, you died."
     Yule's eyes darken. "And... What was that like... for all of you?"
     "Bill took it the worst, for sure," Mabel puts in with a grave face when I cannot answer for myself. "He was yelling all sorts of enchantments and curses from all sorts of languages, and his cries broke my heart."
     Yule looks to me for confirmation, and I answer, "Yeah, if I still had demonic energy when I was shouting all that stuff, we would have been in trouble.  Pacifica took the whole thing badly, too. She was the first to cry, to take you into her arms. She even tried to wake you, much more forcefully than the rest of us tried."
     "The Society gave their sincerest apologies and cut that chain off Bill's neck. Then they just left," Dipper informs Yule.
     "And... how did my family take the news?" Yule asks, his eyebrows furrowed in worry.
     "Your mother certainly did not take it well at first," I tell him, "but she's calmer now, she even hugged me during your funeral. Your brother... I still have no idea what to think of that guy," I give a small smile. "I'm not sure exactly what he's feeling, though he does look upset, a little angry, too."
     Yule nods with a frown. "Okay. And what was the funeral like?"
     "I honestly can hardly remember any of it," I admit, gripping the hem of my shirt. "Merrily approached me afterwards."
     "She did?" Yule asks, and I hear a bit of hopefulness in his voice.
     "One of the few of our classmates who could make it," I reply, shifting to sit cross-legged. "She said that-" I catch myself, but I might be too late. I don't want to tell this to Yule when there's pretty much no chance of the two of them ever becoming closer than they ever were anymore. But he would want me to tell him.
"What?" he asks intently, one of his floating hands brushing back a curl of his hair. I'm still getting used to that. "What did she say?"
"That she liked you, too," I tell him, softer this time.
He does not give the reaction that I thought he would. Instead, he closes his eyes, and a bright smile cracks his face. "Ah," is all he says in reply.
     We hear the doorbell sound from downstairs. Yule yelps and jumps, or rather, phases halfway through the floor. Weird. 
     Dipper laughs. "Idiot, that's my girlfriend."
Yule's face turns a deep shade of... gray? "Oh.. I mean, I knew that!"
"You guys upstairs?" Pacifica yells.
"Yeah! Come on up!" Dipper calls back.
I hear the sound of feet thumping against stairs, and I hold my breath in anticipation for whatever is to come next.
Pacifica enters the room and looks around at us, "What's going-" she stops as her eyes land on Yule. "What?" She stands still, gaping, in complete disbelief.
Yule tries to stand up and greet her, but one of his feet accidentally phases through the floor. "Frick!" he exclaims in terrified surprise. He gets control over himself and stands upright. "I'm still getting used to this..." he says sheepishly, rubbing the back of his head.
"Yule?" Pacifica whispers, her hands over her mouth as her eyes fill with tears. Her reaction is a lot calmer than the rest of ours were.
"Yeah," he murmurs back at an equal volume, a loving, gentle smile across his face as his eyebrows furrow upwards. "I'm home."
"Thank God!" Pacifica exclaims with a sob. She runs to give him a hug, but Dipper catches her before she can.
     "Ah, ah, ah," Dipper says, wagging his finger. "Mabel already learned her lesson. You'll fall right through." He himself embraces her as she dries her tears.
     She pulls away and looks at Yule. "So, you're a-"
     "Ghost?" Yule finishes with a laugh. "Yeah, I know."
     "How does it feel?" she asks with interest and astonishment.
     "Like I really want pizza," he replies, making us all laugh. He pouts. "It's not funny! I really want to eat." He giggles, but then his expression saddens. "It is freeing, not having a body anymore, but... I do miss it. I feel like Haunter from Jokémon." He pauses. "Wait, no, bad example. I feel... like Al from Halfmetal Alchemist. I'm here, but it's just my soul. I miss not being able to eat, to feel. Pain is the worst until you suddenly realize you'll never feel it again." He looks down at his hands. "I don't want to be like this for the rest of my life... or... afterlife?"
     "Would you rather not be here than be like this with us?" I ask tentatively.
     "No. I want to be here. I really do. If I didn't..." he sighs, "I don't suppose I'd be here."
     "I'm so sorry, Yule," Mabel tells him, her eyes big and sad.
     "Yeah," he sits back down, biting his lip and closing his eyes. "I am, too."