Borrowed Time- A Drarry Fanfiction

Chapter 7

THIS SONG IS SO SAD. 

Okay guys, so this is going to be similar to the movie where Draco's crying and all that, but it's obviously not the same time, it's just that Draco's crying but on a different timescape if that makes sense... 

Harry's POV

The next few days, although we still went for the night walks, I no longer felt I could be content with the silence. And yet, I had to be. It was all that I would get, and I couldn't ask for more. Then I knew somehow it would all go away. So I dealt with the silence... In the day I didn't see much of Draco, and when I did I would try and go the other direction without too much conflict. I wasn't hurt, I was just unsure of what was happening.

But one day, after an uneventful Charms class, I was walking alone. One thing you should never do when you're trying to avoid someone is to walk alone, but, of course, I didn't know that. And so there I was, just walking to my next lesson, or perhaps it was lunch. I couldn't remember. Hermione was usually the one who herded us to our classes. (This, Harry, is why you should never take 'Mione for granted) 

And then I heard sobbing. Now, a sensible bloke would have walked away, respecting whoever's privacy it was. But not me. No. (IM HARRY FRICKING POTTAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ok bye) Instead, I went looking for the source of the noise, my curiosity piqued.

It was coming from a classroom that nobody visited because it was so out of the way. Even I hadn't seen it, and I had been basically everywhere in the castle, with or without consent.

When I approached the doorway, I recognized the figure and was backing away quickly. But he had seen me. He turned around, and I saw his beautiful face streaked with tears. 

"M-Malfoy..." I stuttered. I had been prepared to walk out of here, but seeing his face... I knew I had to do something. Anything. Even if it was just for my own heart.

"Sod off, Potter. I don't need your sympathy." he narrowed his eyes at me, and I could tell he was trying to disguise his tears. I couldn't help it. I took a step towards him.

"I said..." he began again, but I couldn't bear it. I couldn't bear the fractured soul that showed in his eyes.

"Malfoy, I know this sounds odd, but... It doesn't show weakness when you cry. It just shows..." I swallowed. "It just shows you've been strong for too long." (FOUND THIS LINE ON PINTEREST)

He took a step back, his eyes wide and surprised. But then he regained his composure. "Rich coming from you, Potter. I bet you cry yourself to sleep every damn night-" Draco was cut off because I seemed to have too much butterbeer or something. Or maybe it was because I could still see that his eyes were full. Either way, I did something so reckless, so brash that I kicked myself afterward.

I leaned forward a little on my toes, and... And I kissed him. Felt his sculpted lips against my own. His lips were completely still, and I pulled away. I knew what was coming, but it still hurt. Still hurt, hell, it hurt so much. 

I knew I had screwed up. Knew it when I looked into those eyes of his and saw no love there. What if the mirror had been a fake? A prank? A duplicate that didn't really work? I had made a mistake. I knew it from my head to my toes, to the fractured pieces of my heart. And yet I knew that heart only belonged to him; That going to someone else to heal it wouldn't do any good.

"I'm sorry," I told him. Sorry for doing this to him, but not sorry for the kiss. Then, head hanging low, I walked away, wishing it could be different. Silently breaking, wishing it could be different.

Argh frick, why am I crying?

Draco's POV

I couldn't take it anymore. No. I had watched Harry, well, more than normal, which was saying something, and he hadn't glanced at me once. He was avoiding me, and our night walks had become fused with tension, and I knew why. The damned mirror. I could have told what would have been in the mirror even if we hadn't seen it. How had I been so stupid? Why did I do it?

And suddenly, hot tears were spurting down my face, and I had to rush into the nearest classroom. I knew I didn't deserve him; Why had I tried? Why had I tried when I knew it would only end in heartbreak?

Even as I asked that question, I knew the answer. Because I was so damn selfish, I couldn't let him go and be happy. No. I knew it didn't matter to me if I was happy; I just wanted to see him smile. But then why had I done this? Why had I admitted to this? Why had I put my happiness above his own?

And it was sheer self-loathing that made me collapse upon myself and let the tears flow. I wanted to promise myself that it wouldn't happen again, but I couldn't say for sure.

After I sat there pathetically, breaking apart, I resolved to get up. But I couldn't find the means to. I was that pathetic. Harry deserved so, so much better.

Thus began the waterworks, once more. 

Someone stepped into the room. I knew who it was, even before I turned around.

But then I did, and almost began sobbing again as I saw the concern in his eyes. Why had I made that stupid bet with Pansy? I could never break his heart.

"Sod off, Potter. I don't need your sympathy." No use denying I was crying, so I decided just to be as offensive as possible. He stepped forward, unconsciously biting his lip, and I panicked.

"I said..." I started again, but he interrupted me.

"Malfoy, I know this sounds odd, but... It doesn't show weakness when you cry. It just shows..." he swallowed. "It just shows you've been strong for too long." he murmured. I couldn't take this. I couldn't. Him being nice to me when I, in no way deserved it. His lying, when he said I was strong. I didn't know what to do so I resorted to what I did best.

 "Rich coming from you, Potter. I bet you cry yourself to sleep every damn night-" I started, but was silenced by the most beautiful thing that happened to me. He kissed me. Harry Potter. Harry (fricking) Potter kissed me. And I did the stupidest thing I could have in that situation.

I didn't kiss back.

I was so surprised that I just let it happen. It should have been natural for my body to kiss him back, but... It wasn't. I felt like my body wanted to, but couldn't break a barrier in my mind or something.

I was so, so, so stupid, and I realized that when he broke away from me. I could almost hear his heart breaking. Why was I so... me? I saw that heart break again as he looked into my eyes; His heart was reflected in the sudden dullness of his eyes. Why hadn't I kissed back? Gods above, I knew I wanted to, so why hadn't I?

I may deserve this heartbreak, but not him. My heart could break, my soul could die, but why couldn't I leave him alone.

"I'm sorry," he told me, and I wanted to open my mouth, to say something then, but I couldn't. He walked away, and I knew it was the last time I would ever see his smile directed towards me, however few times it had been. The last time I'd be able to look at him without feeling a crushing sense of guilt.

The last time.

Yeah, that was short, and not very well written. But I felt so sad whilst writing it. This chapter is slightly shorter than the other ones, and I do apologize, but this just made me so sad to write I couldn't continue. The next part would be included in this chapter, but its a little bit separate, so I couldn't do that. Thank you all for reading this part, and have a great day!

-S